Daygame Mediocrity #5 – The Rock Star Lifestyle

October 13, 2016
krauserpua

Oooh, we’re gettin’ ready        Ow!!!
Here we go      hahaha!!!!!
I’m ready     Oooh!!!

My vibe, RIGHT FUCKING NOW!!!!!!

My vibe, RIGHT FUCKING NOW!!!!!!

Whats up guys! Welcome to another episode of rockstar life with me Nick “The Solution” Krauser. I just woke up at 2pm because of next door’s dog barking at the garbage collector truck, stoppnig my plan to sleep till three. As I lay in my bed I thought what would Axl Rose do?

Getting ready to rock
Getting ready to roll
I’m gonna turn up the heat
I’m gonna fire up the coal [1]

Rock-starring isn’t all cocaine-fuelled hotel-trashing parties with groupies you know [2]. Sometimes you have to put on your y-fronts, make some Weetabix, and sit on a chair watching Killroy. Tomorrow I plan to stay in bed until 3pm. YES MUTHAFUCKAS!!!! 3PM!!! I heard Gene Simmons would regularly rise after FOUR O’CLOCK the madman! That’s my goal.

Target LOCK!

Target LOCK!

I’m listening to AC/DC.

I’m a HEATSEEKER!!!!! BURNING UP THE TOWN! H-E-A-T-S-E-E-K-E-R!!!!   My state is so high and I DON’T NEED NO ONE TO HOSE ME DOWN

Right. Where was I? Right, the Weetabix is finished and I’m going to hit the TOWN. Right action means taking action that is RIGHT not WRONG. Because then it’s WRONG ACTION and you know who takes WRONG ACTION????

Chodes. That’s who.

Anyway, guys. I hope you found that lesson useful. Email me for ROCK STAR LIFESTYLE coaching so you too can live my life. Not my actual life – that would be weird. In fact, why would you want exactly my life? What’s fucking wrong with you, anyway? Are you the Talented Mr Shipley?

You gotta keep that woman firing
You gotta keep that serpent clean
You gotta make her sound the siren
You gotta hear that lady scream [3]

[1] – But not “burn the coal”, if you take my meaning.
[2] – which is just as well because I don’t seem to get invited to such parties right now. I need to increase my self-belief and freedom-of-intent to get those piling up.
[3] – Ironically after three hours of RIGHT ACTION in Covent Garden I made two little Portuguese tourists scream, and not in the good way.

Daygame Mediocrity #3 – Same Day Lay With Russian Supermodel*

October 9, 2016
krauserpua

The strongest frame wins.

There is no objective reality. We are all moist robots who are programmed to survive and reproduce rather than to see the world as it really is. A true master persuader can win every time if only he is in the moment and he lives through his intentions with freedom from outcome and a dailed- in nimbis for the Now to utilise his ultimate seduction model to a peak of tight game with kino-leading and forward stacking.

It’s simple stuff, people.

So here I present you with the most AUTHENTIC and real video to build your self confidence (100% HONEST) and become your AUTHENTIC SELF in the MOMENT and reach TRUE ALIGNMENT. Forget the Krauser Toolkit and all the other BULLSHIT that PUAs were selling you only yesterday. Here’s the secret about women:

They don’t have brains. They don’t have opinions.

Even if a girl is in love with her steady boyfriend, they’ve announced their engagement to family and friends, and she’s blissfully happy at the thought of marrying her true love – a man she’s admired for years, feels a close personality fit with, has bonded over shared experiences, and with whom she’s planned a life together.

IT DOESN’T FUCKING MATTER!

Women are IN THE MOMENT. You – a narrow-shouldered 5’6″ PUA of ethnic origin who is only in town for two weeks hitting on literally every girl you see despite not speaking her language – yes YOU can still get that girl if you do just ONE THING!

What is that ONE THING? What is the BIG SECRET? I’ll tell you.

You must simply get in the moment and be truly authentic with yourself and your separate personalities to project yourself as mindful of intent and yet free from outcome and then refuse to accept NO for an answer because this is beasting and so you hold her hand and do kino-leading and move her for the idate to build a domino effect or something that I can’t actually explain and then with a deep romantic connection she’ll be IN THE MOMENT and forget about that**

Why?

Because she’s a girl so she doesn’t have a brain, or preferences, or any ability at all to reject your ULTIMATE GAME.

*  Your experience of the video may differ. This was obviously a clear SDL opportunity but I decided to reject her because it was 12:55, I was a bit hungry and Coffee Shop Company stop serving ham and mozzarella panninis at 1pm. I was so free from outcome that I decided a pannin and americano were a higher priority. Still, because she would’ve totally fallen for my game – had I just idated her – I’m still counting it as a notch.

** Or just mute out the bit where you offer her a job, and the later bits where she asks about the job, and get a creepy friend to fill those spaces with audio analysis.

Daygame Mediocrity #2 – Krauserfoolery and the Street Swindle

October 5, 2016
krauserpua

The world is not how it appears. We have been brought up to expect a certain stability to the world around us, weened off dependence on our parents and onto dependence on the government and upon cultural tropes. There’s a set formula to dating now: install the Tinder app, swipe right, then hope you get picked. We are using machines to date.

Wouldn’t it be great if we could date against this machine?

I have conducted extensive research into the social world and I have a secret for you: many people are already living their lives against the machine. They are swimming against the crowd and hustling a buck here and there.

  • Con men are befriending elderly old women in end-of-life care homes then swindling them out of their life savings.
  • Double-glazing salesmen are cold-calling low-IQ housewives on owner-occupied housing estates and bullshitting them into buying expensive new windows.
  • Jewish hedge-fund managers are paying off backhanders to financial regulators to get inside information or forebearance to ignore the imminent collapse of their Ponzi schemes.

I ask you – the aspiring daygamer – what can we learn from these men? What can we learn from the world’s most immoral swindlers that we can then action in our own quest to swindle women out of sex they’d never freely give up to us?

Respect the hustle, yesterday

Respect the hustle, yesterday

Hi, I’m Uncle Nick and I’d like to introduce you to the Krauser Toolkit [1] that you can practice with your daygame. Each day you go out, I want you to do 300 sets and keep one of these tricks in mind:

Krauser Stop – This entails walking up to a girl, making weird “bee bop” noises and waving your hands like a retard.
Hand of Krauser – Shake a girl’s hand when you introduce yourself.
Pedo Eyes – Holding steady and slightly creepy eye contact with a girl you really don’t believe you are entitled to fuck [2]

Watch and learn, my trainee swindlers. Here is another set from Daygame Mediocrity.

[1] – Please, please, don’t actually take any of this seriously.

[2] – Really, don’t. I’m trolling.

Join the secret society – Citydaygame edition

July 14, 2016
krauserpua

I checked my pedometer today and realised I’ve averaged 15km every day I’ve been in Prague on my latest jaunt. No wonder my feet ache. It’s been a funny old time – I got a notch on my first full day, then maybe deflowered a virgin on the second (there’s some confusion over if I had my dick fully in for the relatively short time it lasted before she ran), got a blowjob off a 17yr old bisexual an hour after gutter gaming her, and there were a few lesser stories in the mix. It felt like I was in some kind of secret society. A tiring society. So tiring I can’t be bothered to write blogposts. In fact the only thing I can be bothered to write is a Pokemon Go style easter egg. So as I’m recently won’t to do, I tapped up the citydaygame boys for some content. This time Colombia-slayer Vaughn offers his thoughts on entering the Secret Society. Do check out their blog for lots of player’s journey stories.

Uni days, artist's impression

Uni days, artist’s impression

I was a complete loser with girls throughout my school days and at University. During Uni I was obsessed with three girls, one was the sister of one of my best friends. A blonde girl with big tits and blue eyes. She’d come up to visit her brother and fuck one of the popular guys in our group. I tried everything to get her to like me, and wondered what the other guy had that I didn’t. We’d all go out and drink together, she’d tease me, I thought I had a chance with her. I was deluded.

The 2nd was the first girl I fingered, I cooked her a romantic dinner to win her over, she was impressed. After dinner I tried to escalate, I had no clue, we were kissing in her bed I got my hands down her panties and rubbed her pussy roughly. That’s as far as I got, we didn’t meet again. She went off to Canada for a year, where she fucked a boatload of Canadian guys.

The third girl I had a thing for, was short athletic and pretty. One Valentines day, I made her a trail of messages, I remember making the clues and hiding them around our shared house. I wanted to show her how much I liked her. I cringe looking back now. I did “win” a pity date with her, which was just a way for her to get me on my own and let me down gently. She put me firmly into the friend zone.

I had no clue how to seduce any of these girls and all my attempts ended in brush offs or friend-zonings. Even the tried and tested, get them drunk and hope for the best didn’t work, at least for me. Looking back, I can see all the failures, failure to escalate them, failure to isolate, getting too drunk, over investment, pedestalisation. I had zero game, I didn’t even know what game was. What was worse I had no idea how to change this. In the end I did lose my virginity.

One night I was out in a club, a girl said “I like your hair”, she drunkenly kissed me, then a taxi back to mine, my first same night lay. She mounted me on my bed and took my virginity, I was 21, we dated for a while, I thought we’d be together for ever, we were a terrible match. I visited her after her first night at her new industry placement, she’d been partying the night before with her new colleagues., she was very hungover. I sensed something was different, she sat me on her bed and dumped me. She told me she’d kissed a guy the previous night, I was devastated. I’m still unsure whether she’d fucked the guy as well. Thinking back, of course she fucked him. I left her flat and actually cried.

Re-enactment with actors

Re-enactment with actors

Fast forward 15 years, the last girl I fucked was a cute Colombian air hostess 10 years my junior, one hour before I had to get my flight to London and 45 mins before she had to start work on her flight. It was a fast 25 mins of sex. I couldn’t find her place in a Bogota suburb, I was an hour late. Her two female housemates had just arrived home, she was rushing to get ready for her work and I had to get my flight soon. She was on her period too, this shouldn’t work.

I enter her room, 5 minutes of chat and 10 minutes later I’ve rubbered up and am banging her on her bed, she’s half dressed in her trolley dolly uniform and trying to keep quiet so her housemates don’t hear. I’m halfway through and her housemate calls her name, knocks on her door and asks her something in Spanish.  She motions me to be quiet. I pause, she shouts an answer. A quick exchange in Spanish, interval over. She’s back grabbing at my ass, pulling me deeper into her, I resume banging her, she’s still trying to keep quiet, she’s not doing a good job at it.

I calculate how long I have to get my flight, and realise I need to finish soon. I ramp it up, and fuck her hard, cumming as she gasps. We lay there for a couple of minutes, I pull the condom off and throw it on the floor.

She turns on the lights, the condom is a red bloody mess, I look at my groin and see the splatters of blood. I pull my pants and walk naked to her bathroom. I clean my cock in her sink and use the hand towel to dry it off. When I return she’s removed her uniform and is ready for a shower. I dress and sit in the lounge room, her two housemates eye me. I smirk and ask one of them to call me a taxi. The girl leaves the shower and dresses. my taxi is arriving. We kiss and she whispers “thank you”. I rush to the airport and just manage to catch my flight.

The younger version of myself wouldn’t have imagined that this pre-flight fuck was possible. I would have been disgusted with fucking a girl on her period. How things change.

Through months of cold approach and dates I’ve internalised much of the skill set (taught in Daygame Mastery) and tools used in Daygame and by doing this I’ve given myself the ability to act on opportunities with women when they arrive. You can come from really terrible to beginnings like me and still learn to slay pussy. I’m 36 and get more girls than I ever did in my early 20s. It takes time, effort, pain and applying the lessons but the rewards are worth it.

Daygame and cold approach enrich your life, they give you stories and excitement, it’s dangerous, dirty and fun. You realise what is possible and you can’t imagine a life without it. When the secret society opens it’s bloody gates and lets you in, you won’t want to leave.

If you thought that post expertly retold a daygame journey with dramatic flourish, you should see my old book.

The Hare and the Tortoise

April 26, 2016
krauserpua

I’m a logical, disciplined man reared on book reading and video games. I also spent a large portion of my adult life working in finance and learning martial arts. This encouraged me to develop an incremental linear meta-view of the world.

A meta-what????

Ask yourself this – how does one progress or achieve in life?

Most people of my fuddy-duddy generation were brought up to think we are tortoises rather than hares. The fact that parable is so well understood proves the point that it’s heavy in the zeitgeist. We have been taught that success is about plodding on with smart, persistent hard work and as you continually endure and overcome setbacks, you make your long march towards progress.

  • Work nine to five in an office and keep building up the experience and skills to earn that next promotion.
  • Study for your exams, learn formulae, answer practice questions under exam conditions and then you’ll eventually pass.
  • Hit the gym four times a week, do your reps, slightly increased the weight each time, and your body with grow strong and ripped.
  • Hit the streets three times a week for your 10 + 10 + 20 daygame sets and after enough grinding the lays come through.

But is this actually how we progress?

I don’t think so. Now, I don’t want to take the opposite end of that caricature and recommend the “lottery ticket” strategy or fatalistic Magical Thinking. There’s undoubtedly value in grim determination and persistence – even talents like Floyd Mayweather Jnr will put the hours into bagwork and jump rope. It’s a necessary condition but not a sufficient one. Real progress often comes down to two steps:

  1. Recognising a rare opportunity
  2. Jumping on it

[You could add an earlier step of “making your opportunities” too but that’s what targeted grindwork is meant to create]

Much of success comes down to smart decisions taken at key moments, when the combination of hard work and lucky fate throw up a bifurcation point. How many football games have been won and lost because one player spotted an opening, made the run, and was in the right place when the ball ricocheted off the crossbar? How many boxing matches have been won not due to a steady build up of jabs and body shots but by trapping the opponent into walking onto that one home-run left hook? How many battles have been won not due to steady attrition and tactics but by one innovation or one general’s courageous decision taken on the field of battle?

Me coaching by osmosis, yesterday

Me coaching by osmosis, yesterday

Most of the women you see on the street are not going to fuck you. Just not going to happen. They don’t fancy you, or they are taken, or they are in the wrong mood, or they are against meeting strangers, or everything works out great and then logistics intervene. Failure is the natural persistent state of Game. Players are really looking out for two things in a girl:

  1. She’s available
  2. She’s into you

Some guys have such high SMV and their ping range so wide that (2) is frequently satisfied. However blog readers are well aware I have no interest in looks-matched age-matched “game”. Even the David Gandys of this world have a narrow pool of available/into-you from which to draw if they are red-lining it towards the upper limit of their quality ceiling. Aiming high forces scarcity onto everybody.

So how does this relate to daygame strategy?

In poker you will lose almost every hand. You’ll fold most hands at the very first deal because your two cards simply aren’t any good to pursue. Even if you bet to reach the Flop, you’ll fold most flops. That’s the smart strategy because it costs chips to play a hand. If you’re always trying to get involved, you’ll just burn through your stack. An aspiring poker player must control his urge to play everything.

Compare this to a typical office, factory or service job. In those roles you have a linear relationship to each task. Maybe you process passport applications – you begin the day with a stack of them and then work through steadily, each taking approximately the same time and mental energy. Each incrementally earning that paycheck. Maybe you install widgets in an appliance assembly line – again it’s steady even work that steadily earns your paycheck. Same with serving diners or checking in hotel guests. It’s the tortoise steadily moving towards the finish line. Slow and steady wins the race.

Poker players do not incrementally increase their winnings. It’s feast or famine. There are a tiny number of hands where you can win big so you must identify them and play them perfectly. You lose often, so make sure you lose small. You win rarely, so you’d better win big and scoop a fat pot. A key skill in poker is to keep your losses small so that you still have enough of a stack to play the rare good hands correctly.

Daygame is poker. Almost every girl is a No, but every now and then you’ll meet a girl who is available and into you. That’s when you bring your stack into play.

It doesn’t really matter if you’re fucking 1-in-20 opens or 1-in-100. The important point is that even with fantastically (I’d say suspiciously) good ratios like 1-in-20 you’re dealing with the reality of 19/20 (95%) of opens being a road to nowhere. You need to identify these No’s early so you don’t whittle down your Vibe Stack on idates-to-nowhere, text-hell, and time-waster-dates. That’s the daygame equivalent of betting too long on a losing hand. Just like you can only bring so many chips to a poker game, you only have so much enthusiasm for daygame and it will eventually wear out and require time-off to replenish.

The whole time you are looking to identify that rare set that could win the entire pot. That’s a real skill. That’s how daygame is played at the strategic level.

This is why you should never spam approach. That’s like a poker player on tilt. A spammer is a blind idiot who bets every hand without checking his cards, running the maths, or watching his opponent’s betting behaviour. He’s not really playing poker at all, he’s doing a mechanical empty caricature of it with none of the craft. He’s pissing away all his chips on hopeless hands until his stack is gone. Even the most aspy nerd incurs emotional costs in daygaming and by spamming he is massively increasing the amount of failure.

The RSD school of "bet all-in every single hand"

The RSD school of “bet all-in every single hand” daygame

This isn’t the “every failure takes you a step closer to success” where you judiciously choose your sets and learn from them. This is more like “every failure takes you closer to a meltdown and giving up the game entirely”. When you give in to the temptation to spam you are switching off your brain and losing the ability to read signals. The sets just blur into one another as if they are more widgets or more passport applications. True art is not made by throwing paint at the canvas and no football team wins a World Cup by shooting every single time they get the ball.

You need to go out and you frequently need to grind, but don’t ever think that x number of sets will lead to y number of results. Sets are not widgets. Grinding just means you are sitting at the poker table, putting in your ante, and waiting until you get a hand worth playing. That’s when you really turn the game on, like the hare turning on a burst of speed.

Once overheard in a daygame set….

April 25, 2016
krauserpua

I’m walking past the theatre on Sunday evening in Prague, just around the corner from Palladium mall. A solo vulnerable-looking girl walks past so I open, hook and run my usual banter. Just another set in a holiday full of them. One thing that stands out in my memory is this conversation. It’s not verbatim, but as close as I can remember it.

Me: What do you do in life? What’s your thing?
Her: I work for an NGO. We help transitional countries become more democratic.
Me: I have no idea what a transitional country is.
Her: It means countries outside the First World which are maybe moving from a dictatorship. Places like Georgia, Albania. We are a European Commission NGO and we advise and coordinate with other locally-based NGOs to help them become more democratic.

I almost threw up into my mouth. An insiduous make-work programe for women to interfere in other countries on the tax-payer’s dime at the behest of the ((globalist elite)). I temporarily forgot I was trying to fuck her.

Me: Hang on a minute. Let me get this straight in my head. I’m no expert on NGOs but am I right that you’re telling me…. The European Commission, that is the European Union – the most anti-democratic and tyrannical organisation in all of Europe – has the audacity to tell other countries how to do democracy. The same EU that conducted coup d’etats in Italy and Ukraine? That’s sounds a bit rich.
Her: Umm…. well….

At this point I thought the conversational might get more confrontational than is conducive to seduction, so I changed tack.

Me: Don’t get me wrong. I’m not a democrat. I much prefer dictatorship, so long as I’m the dictator. In fact, I think I’d really enjoy being a dictator. Once I’m King of the World do you know the first edict I’ll issue?
Her: Umm…. what?
Me: I’ll make it illegal to wear silly pink hats [tug at her silly pink hat]. That will carry a sentence of twenty years’ hard labour. Yes, that’s right. The secret police will come for you and march you off. To the gulag with you!
Her: *giggles etc*
Me: Second thing I’ll do is have statues of myself in every town square, like Saddam Hussein. I’ll fill my garage with Italian sports cars and have a swimming pool of champagne. Everything in my palace will be gold. I’d be a good dictator. The best.

How I see myself

How I see myself

Unfortunately she lived with her boyfriend. Still, it’s always fun to spin out fantastical stories on the fly.

More Prague Diaries

April 6, 2016
krauserpua

I’m still beavering away on my soon-to-be-released new memoir. That means much of my creative energy for the “player’s life” writing is channeled into the book rather than the blog. Nonetheless I’ve had a pretty good five-day trip in Prague that just ended early this morning. Let’s recap how that went down.

Friday
I shuffle bleary-eyed out of Vaclav Havel airport and onto the 119 bus, a light drizzle greeting me. My usual landlady is waiting at her apartment building by Palladium mall in central Prague and she checks me in to a new place. It’s nice. Perfect location, nice lounge, good solid bed and most important of all…. a hot shower. I venture out for coffee and soon meet up with one of Prague’s resident daygamers. It’s still a bit nippy so I’m wearing my thermal under the t-shirt and a cardigan and leather jacket over it. We hit the streets. Mentally I’m fine but just lacking enthusiasm. The first few sets are quick blowouts.

It’s getting on the 6pm and my eighth set when I finally get a solid hook point from a girl who doesn’t have a boyfriend. Tall, blonde, twenty-year old Russian student. Spider sense is triggering so I take her to the patio cafe on the nearby Theatre. She settles in well and joins me for a beer at Chateau Rouge. Halfway through the drink it seems really on – she’s eye sparkling, gazing at my lips, allowing the kino. With smooth self-confidence I draw her in for a kiss.

“Come here” I beckon. She moves her face closer to mine.

“Closer” I command, and she comes closer still. I go for the kiss.

She suddenly short-circuits and pulls away. Denied. I try to salvage it with more comfort and a walk around the Old Town but she’s decided I’m not good for her. She wanders off without leaving her number. I wouldn’t call it four hours wasted – not with such a delightful girl – but it was most definitely frustrating.

Saturday
The sun has got it’s hat on and I’m coming out to play. A couple of Danish guys are in town doing daygame and a couple of travellers recognise me too and introduce themselves. All told, five different people stop me on the narrow strip from Palladium to New Yorker. I press on with my daygame and it’s going okay. Unfortunately I’m having bad luck – there’s always a boyfriend or husband or immediate flight home. I run diagnostics on the quality of my street game and I know it’s fine. Just need to keep plodding on. I’m very much focused on picking sets carefully, avoiding any blind opens. So all in I probably only do ten sets for the day. Mostly I’m enjoying the walk and watching with satisfaction as my pedometer app clicks off the kilometres.

Night cuts in around 8pm and I stop a cute Russian blonde on her way to a party. She’s visiting from Moscow to compete in an event and is now joining her team for an afterparty. They leave early the next morning. I try to get her to fuck off the party but no joy. So I street kiss close her. Haven’t done that in a while *

She takes her leave and I walk off with a smile. Less than fifteen metres and one minute later I stop a hot Russian student with flowing blonde hair. She’s keen and joins me for an idate. Unfortunately the clock is ticking because I’m meeting a Long Game virgin at 10pm. So I escalate the Russian a little in the bar and take her number. Then I rush to New Yorker to meet my evening date. The virgin stays over and wants to fuck. Unfortunately I just can’t get my dick in. It’s rather frustrating. I fall asleep.

Sunday
We try to fuck again in the morning but it’s just not possible – she’s too tight and sensitive. She goes off to study and I sleep in until 2pm. I wake up disorientated, knowing I have a first date at 3pm with a girl commuting in from her tiny Czech village. She was a number from my previous trip here. Village girl is on time and looking nice – a twenty year old. We have coffee at the same terrace cafe and a beer at the same Chateau Rouge. She’s only got two hours until her train home so I rush a bit trying to get her into my apartment. She refuses. So I walk her to a church and kiss close in the grounds then send her home.

Next is a date with the catwalk model I fucked on my previous trip. She’s been rather difficult to deal with over WhatsApp while I was back in Newcastle. My read is that she fancies me a lot but thinks I’m bad for her. She’s probably right. We go for a beer at a nice beatnik bar. She spends the first hour being difficult, breaking rapport, and acting like she’s friendzoning me. She spends the next hour with her tongue down my throat before rushing off to a house party.

I’m a little perturbed. That’s three hot twenty year olds I kissed today and no sex. I do a rage-open, my only set of the day, on a brunette standing outside McDonalds. Strangely she’s also twenty. She comes on an idate to Battalion bar where she tells me she used to do webcam masturbation for money. It’s going well until I ask:

“What do you like about me?”

“Nothing at all. You’re not my type” she says.

All of the sexual tension disappears and I realise she was just a time waster. I let her leave then I buy a Burger King milkshake and go home. It feels like Prague doesn’t want me to get laid.

Monday
I’m out solo for a while, deciding I should up my game a little. I still can’t find the right vibe or the right girls. One set goes great with a hot young blonde but then her brother comes over to cock-block. About seven sets in I’m thinking it’s just one of those bad days. Then I catch an IOI of a brunette and do a set that absolutely crackles with sexual tension. She’s looking at my lips constantly and I’m certain I could’ve kissed her there and then. But that would be dumb, so I take the number. I considered the idate but she said she’s going to meet friends.

For the first time all day my vibe is good and as I’m explaining something to my wing, I clap my hands in emphasis. A sultry brunette walking alongside me starts at the clap and glances my way. That’s my opener. After five minutes she says: “Are you going somewhere? We could walk a bit?”

We end up in Battalion bar again having a late-afternoon beer. Again the clock is ticking because I have a dinner date lined up with a regular for 8pm. So I have an hour to work and it’s going good. I figure the questions game is a quick way to move things along.

“Tell me a secret about you” I ask.

“I am a porn star” she says.

Oh.

As we finish our drinks she pipes up, “would you like to snort something with me tonight?”

We agree to meet at 11pm and I rush off to eat pasta at my regular’s house. I fuck her, shower, then rush back into central Prague to meet the porno girl. She’s on time and I walk her straight home. It’s a bit weird at first, she says “I’m only buying one bottle of beer, because I’m leaving in thirty minutes” but as soon as the coke is opened the mood seems to improve. I’m not telling you all the details. It’s enough to know I didn’t sleep a wink all night and I had an awful lot of sex with her. Including while watching her videos on the internet. That memory is likely to remain seared into my brain for years.

Tuesday
I’m an empty shell of a man all day. I stumble around, can’t eat, and just struggle with one hell of a comedown. I’m getting all philosophical, telling myself that I’m pretty sure that notches no longer motivate me, maybe I’ve fucked enough women, and video games look awfully appealing right now. Finally I go home and watch YouTube videos of 1980s pop songs all night. I need to be up early for my flight.

Lest you think this is my usual pattern, I’ll tell you now this was a rather volatile jaunt. Usually I get more steady results at each stage of the game, rather than this kind of feast-or-famine. Nonetheless, I’m pleased. Average age of girls I’ve notched this year is 20.5 which is exactly half my age. I doubt I’ll keep the average that low as the year progresses.

* Because it’s stupid flash game

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