For regular readers, Tom Torero needs no introduction. So I shan’t give him one. Take it away, fella……

The amount of cognitive dissonance for someone new to Game is seemingly overwhelming. It’s a nightmarish clashing of conflicting ideas from so many sources where you can’t see the wood for the trees.

This confusion does nothing to help a guy who’s getting into the swing of things and doing his first cold approaches trying to get the reference experiences under his belt. He’s probably watched dozens of online infields, browsed hundreds of forum posts and amassed an impressive collection of books, PDFs and products that he hopes will make his journey easier.

And then the mind-fuck begins: should he be doing day or night game? Is indirect or direct better? Should he try pre-prepared material or attempt to be natural? Should he approach as much as possible or wait for the girls he really likes? Is verbal or non-verbal more important? Is it essential to be the bad boy or the good guy? Should he make girls laugh or keep a poker face? Is attraction or comfort more important? Should he go for Same Day / Night Lays or master dating? When should he pull the trigger – quickly or slowly? Is it better to immerse himself in Game for a long period or balance it with other interests? Should he take up kick-boxing or meditation to help him on his quest? Should he buy Krauser’s “Daygame Nitro” or Tom Torero’s “Daygame” book?!

It all comes down to being confused about knowing how to reconcile wanting the girl (the “pull”) with not needing the girl (the “push”). How to walk the fine line between persistence and neediness. This forwards and backwards seductive dance is clumsy to begin with, but over time with massive amounts of repetition and practice, a balance begins to be struck. Conscious incompetency becomes conscious competency. The infield action taken internalises the theory, and out of structure comes freedom. Finally a Flow State is reached (unconscious competency) as the skillset is mastered. The sweet spot between pull (Badass) and push (Buddha) has been found. It’s a razor’s edge between the two that only a few will strike consistently, a narrow road between the traps of either extreme.

This table shows the components of both sides of the Badass Buddha:

Finding that sweet spot into a Flow State is what musicians call “freedom in the groove.” It’s what mountaineers talk about when they’re climbing on the razor’s edge between life and death. It’s what Ayrton Senna meant when he described his “tunnel vision” in Formula One. Having such a sensitivity to the sweet spot is what is meant by calibration, achieved through thousands of hours of refinement of the skill set through errors and corrections.

The Badass Buddha might sound like some New Age, Self-Help, Life Coaching bullshit but it’s quite the opposite. In fact, my aim with the concept is to ridicule and spotlight such mumbo-jumbo bollocks, internet marketing scams and chakra cleansing nonsense. I’m making the point that it’s ACTION that has to come first to achieve any kind of personal / psychological change. Not just action, but relentless action*. You can’t have the Buddha before the Badass. It’s like trying to put the cart before the horse. Therein lies the spiritualist crap. A fluffy motivational quote you post on Facebook means nothing. Logging off, leaving your house and facing your fears (such as talking to girls through cold approach) is everything.

To a beginner or an intermediate daygamer reading this, I’d therefore stress that you need to go through the Badass stage first, taking on all the alpha-like traits that feel alien right now. Go too far, be massively persistent, be direct, be sexual, escalate fast, pull the trigger hard. Over time you’ll calibrate yourself back towards the Buddha, with abundance in your dating life giving you the freedom from outcome that is so key. You’ll learn the importance of non-verbal game, of slowing down, of mastering dating, of letting go in the wider sense.

Karmic rebalancing, yesterday

Fuck self help. Get help from the girls right in front of you that will show you the way much faster than any Tony Robbins seminar.

Earlier this year I reached 150 lays (144 of them in the last four years). An egotistical “notch count hyena” statistic on one level, but massive deep level personal changes on another level. In the last month alone I’ve had 5 new lays with the top-tier of girls around the world from London, Spain, the Baltics and Russia. 2013 was the year of really leaning into my edge, finding flow and hitting that sweet spot consistently. I know Krauser’s had an outstanding year too, as I’ve had to listen to a lot of his escapades through rattling apartment walls we’ve shared.

With dedication and practice, the cognitive dissonance becomes clarity, the conflicting ideas distill into essences. The narrow road is there, hidden underneath the brambles and weeds of procrastination and confusion. Cut a path for yourself using the razor sharp blade of action, which alone will provide the answers you’re looking for.

* Could those of you planning to take relentless action please not do so anywhere along the route from Primark at Marble Arch, along Oxford Street down Regent Street and ending at Trafalgar Square. Thanks  – K.

I recently likened the Player’s Journey to a tiger raised in captivity being released from his cage into the wild. When an animal is raised in a zoo a routine and structure is imposed upon it by the zookeeper which removes risk such as through regular feeding (starvation risk) and controlled lodgings (exposure and predation risk) while also severely constraining the normal development of the animal. The animal’s socialisation is retarded. The tiger doesn’t get to roam the wilds, engage with it’s fellows, absorb the sights, sounds and fauna of it’s natural habitat. It’s a house cat. It reminds me of a quote I heard on a boxing telecast twenty years ago. To paraphrase:

There’s no such thing as a good boxer I don’t know about. To get good you must fight good opposition and if you’re fighting those guys, I’ll have heard about you.

The idea that there’s a talented well-developed fighter hidden Kung-Fu Panda-like deep inside an unknown prodigy is ridiculous. It’s the very process of building a career against diverse progressively stiffer opposition that creates the fighter. Without the process, there is no fighter. The journey can’t be skipped. The zoo-bound tiger is denied that process of growth and then suddenly released into the wild without the seasoning to compete. Freedom combined with skills is liberating. Freedom without skills is terrifying.

The Saturday Sarge

Prisoners and long-term hospital patients can suffer from institutionalisation. Humanity’s greatest evolutionary advantage is our ability to adapt to new environments and modify our behaviours, thoughts and emotions to fit in. This becomes dysfunctional in periods of lifestyle upheaval as we clutch at lifelines of the old routine. The daily grind of an institution, be it prison, an LTR or the office, conditions us with certain expectations, partitions off other potential thoughts and behaviours and puts us into a comfortable well-worn rut. The normal pattern of modern social life functions precisely this way because modern city life is atomising. If you spend your whole live aboard the Blue Pill Express you have no control over the destination. Your life is merely passing each station in turn until the end of the line. Work, relationships, entertainment, socialising…. it’s easy to passively accept the artificially narrow bounds upon which society has mapped out your life and to surrender decision-making.

This is why I call the Player’s Journey an emotional rollercoaster – you break out of the zoo. A chode’s life is constrained by social conventions and office routine. Usually his day is planned quite literally to the minute.

• 7:00 – Alarm goes off.
• 7:10 – Put on coffee pot, eat Quakers Porridge with semi-skimmed milk
• 7:20 – Shower
• 7:35 – Open closet, pull out shirt, suit, shoes in that order. Hang them on back of door-frame.

I’ll stop there. Most people’s lives are extremely routinised. It’s efficient and psychologically comforting. There’s a spot for the long term girlfriend in that safe routine and by following social conventions we are deluding ourselves we have escaped the rigours of the sexual marketplace. Just because you ignore a risk, doesn’t mean the environment isn’t risky. Routine is a buffer.

Destination: 7 lifetime lays

So you step out of your gilded cage and into the wilds of Game. What happens then?

You realise your whole life is your responsibility. The zoo-keeper isn’t feeding you or temperature-controlling your cage. It’s all on you now. Sex is something you have to go out and get. The nature of the relationship is for you to determine. Pretty quickly you realise girls are only part of the picture. Everything else is yours to determine:

• your fashion
• your body
• your work path
• you friends

Your life is a project to be managed not a series of orders to follow. Your happiness is your own responsibility. It’s both liberating and a psychological burden. Like the tiger released into the wild you must catch-up and learn all those coping strategies that you should’ve learned as a cub. You can only learn by doing.

It’s the very process of following the Player’s Journey, with its myriad highs and lows, that builds character. Adversity makes the man.

You must go out and live the life. This is why you can’t hide yourself behind internet forums and manosphere chatter. You can’t just buy some cool clothes and VIP tickets. You can’t just inject TRT/HGH and call it confidence. You can’t just reality-weave yourself to strong inner-game. Unless you’ve actually gone out and done the real work the house is built on sand. Your ego will push you back into the gilded cage. Be ready for it. It’s a natural response to the extreme emotional duress that Game places you under. Common traps include:

• Lionise a long term relationship with a “quality woman” and announce your exit from the Game. Fall back into the feminine imperative’s frame and assume all the old chode-risks while telling yourself you have “won”.
• Delusional ramblings about having become alpha / self-actualised, above the mere minions around you.
• Disappear into “value-building” hobbies that require no compliance from the world but give the illusion of moving forwards.

All three of the above are both buffers to patch up a delusional reality and ease away from the psychological rigours of the Game, and also (in rare cases) potentially pleasant end-states for men who have actually arrived there at the end of the rainbow. You really have to know the man to know which it is. Usually it’s a buffer. The lady doth protest too much.

You’ll become a better man by enduring the hardships, the introspection, the identity change and forming the mindsets and habits to cope in the Wild. It’s tough. You must learn your lessons the hard way. The temptation to return to your gilded cage will be strong.

While on a recent trip I formularised a new little frame/tease to throw into sets. Nothing groundbreaking or conclusive, just nice spiking and framing. Allow me to share. One girl I’m working on long game has bright purple hair. Rid all images of face-pierced shaved-temple tattooed feminists from your mind. This is a delightful slim beautiful young Russian art student who is feminine in every respect….. she just happens to dye her long hair purple for aesthetic reasons. While on a short first coffee date:

Me: You know, I’ve just realised [chuckling to self]…. when you walked in I knew you reminded me of someone famous but I couldn’t remember who. Now I’ve got it!

…. tap tap tap into google image search on my phone….she’s in rapt anticipation…

Her: aaaaahahahahhahahhahaaahahaaaa!

A bit later on she’s telling me about her art college in a different town.

Me: I imagine it’s a very different atmosphere over there having all those art students in one place. Here in Krakow it’s quite traditional. Probably when you walk down the street with that purple hair old grannies tut and little children point. But I’ll bet that in Lodz girls like you are ten-a-penny.

Her: Haha etc

Me: In Lodz you probably feel like when a girl who goes to a party and sees another girl in the same dress. There’ll be all these purple-haired girls walking past and you’re thinking “bitch”. You don’t feel like a special unique snowflake anymore. You’re just common.

Thinking about this gave me an idea that this is a repeatable routine on any girl’s deliberately affected quirks.

• Step 1: Identify a quirk. Perhaps it’s her hair, or subculture fashion (punk, metalhead, goth etc), or other affectation.
• Step 2: Compliment her that it’s nice
• Step 3: Playfully sympathise that it must be hard in tradtionally-minded towns. Use the tutting of grannies and pointing of small children.
• Step 4: Contrast it with how utterly common and non-special it is in her imagined chosen environment (town, social group etc).

This tease works because you are bouncing from opposite sides of the spectrum – she’s both a misunderstood rebel and an utterly conformist bore – while giving her a playfully unflattering frame at both sides. You’ve got her bang to rights and women love being called on their shit in a non-angry way. You can generalise the theme further. Imagine you’re chatting to a catwalk model. Obviously it’s important not to be overawed by her job and presumed lifestyle. So run this pattern.

Me: Catwalk, eh? Hmmmmm…. interesting. I suppose it must be quite a contrast in life. Here you are on Oxford Street striding down the street like an angry cat. Very pretty and stylish. You’re the tallest girl here, like Gulliver being in Lilliput. All these other girls seem like oompa loompas and you’re a giant, having to duck when you walk through shop doorways…. and then you go off to a casting and suddenly the whole room is full of giants. You’re just another tall girl in a whole sea of tall girls, all scratching and biting to get the contract. That must be really difficult to get used to, going from being a unique snowflake to just another pretty girl.

You can always find a way to use a girl’s unique high-value attributes as a playfully-framed negative, whether it’s her large breasts, long legs, thick hair, big eyes, great fashion. Creatively invent dual scenarios where the attribute begins as a blessing and ends up as a curse.

You are either the chooser or the chosen. This holds in life generally and also in any given interaction with a girl.

• Chosen: Girl already fancies you and quite likely has already decided to sleep with you before you’ve even initiated the interaction.
• Chooser: Girl doesn’t know or care about you until you make her want to sleep with you by running tight game.

So much of the apparently contradictory advice in the community straightens itself once you ask yourself “Is this Game tip for choosers or the chosen?” Let me give you some examples. My friend “Mark” is a 25 year old tall muscular good-looking guy. He’s so good-looking that he does lots of catwalk shows as a male model. He’s had a few amateur boxing bouts so he’s no Hollister Fag either, he has functional muscularity. His Game is quite simple…. dress cool and walk into a nightclub. Stand around with a chill vibe scanning the crowd, waiting for the horny girls to IOI him. Then he walks over with a cocky smile and rapid escalates each girl in turn to filter out the timewasters and figure out which girl he’s leaving with for an SNL. This works well because he’s The Chosen. There was no attraction phase.

A Hollister Fag, yesterday

Conversely consider another friend, Tom Torero “Bob”. He’s a 34 year old teacher of average looks and physique. His game is to hit the streets and build good vibe, usually getting a bunch of blowouts as he’s warming up until some girls hook. Then he runs the model to build attraction with teasing and challenging, rapport as a street intellectual, then takes a number. After a handful of numbers he sees what comes through the funnel and sets up a Day 2. This works well because he’s The Chooser.

It should be pretty clear that both guys are playing to their strengths and doing what they have to do to make it work. Mark isn’t much of a talker and he doesn’t need to be. Tom Bob isn’t much of a looker and he doesn’t need to be. They are not playing the same game. Let’s break it down further.

The Chosen is any guy who is pre-selected before he opens the girl. The top DJ who has a line of girls waiting for the afterparty, the pro wrestler with his adoring ring rats, the NBA star with his girl in every franchise city, the small-time Indie band bassist with name recognition with the local hipster crowd, the cool party guy at the university hall of residence, the well-connected fashion photographer…. these are all The Chosen. Some are chosen because of their looks, some for their social status, some for their role as gatekeeper to scarce rewards but ALL are able to get laid without Game. And there’s nothing wrong with that. Game isn’t the only way to get laid.

Building an eco-system, yesterday

Chosen One Game is by far the more efficient, assuming you enjoy the lifestyle and work required to build the little eco-system upon which it relies. Consider the rock guitarist at his concert. There may be 500 fans in the audience of whom 250 are females under thirty. Of those 250, perhaps 200 are in relationships they are happy with or simply don’t fancy him. Of the 50 who are available and fancy him, maybe only 20 are hot. Of those 20 maybe 5 are horny and slutty.

A comprehensive filtering mechanism has taken place before the rock guitarist has even looked at the girls.

Those 5 horny and slutty girls will come and find him. They’ll eye him up from the crowd and then hang around backstage waiting for him to notice them. It’s only at this point that he begins the interaction. It’s the warmest of possible opens because the only girls who enter his field of vision are girls who have already passed every filter:

• Fancies him
• Available
• Up for it
• Logistically convenient

Consider this screening mechanism for my friend Mark in a nightclub. He isn’t working an environment quite so favourable (he has competition from other men, cockblocks, crappier logistics, less pre-selection) but most of those conditions are at least partially met. So long as he is alive to the IOIs he’ll naturally filter his interactions so he only needs to open single horny girls who already fancy him.

Now let’s consider The Chooser game.

When Tom Bob hits the streets the girls are unfiltered. They are just normal girls engrossed in their normal daily activities. There is no natural filter so he must apply his own. Look for the girls who are walking solo, or looking dreamy, or dressed to indicate horniness. Look for isolated girls such as tourists. Ultimately there’s no reliable filter except opening itself – flip the stone and see if she’s a Yes, Maybe or No girl. Most of the girls will be filtered out at this point by not hooking, indicating they aren’t available or aren’t into him. Of those remaining there may be mild interest which can be amplified by tight game. Sometimes a girl is so hot you aren’t filtering her at all – you are putting out your best possible game and just hoping she likes it.

Chooser game is incredibly inefficient. But if you’re not The Chosen you have to become The Chooser. Or else you don’t get laid much.

Oxford Street, yesterday

I think of Chooser game like putting together an offensive drive in American Football. It’s a series of plays designed to move the ball down the field / move the girl along the courtship ritual. At every step her instinct is a defensive line. The rule of nature is the male intitiates and pushes while the women reacts and resists until she’s finally overcome. The male needs to create something out of nothing whereas the female can simple break up the plays and swat the ball out of the air. The Chooser needs Game.

In contrast The Chosen is in the “hot girl position”. The female is trying to make a play on him. This is why Chosen game can be aloof and full of assholery. You can barely invest and just let her chase because the script was flipped before you said hello. The Chooser begins from zero. He must first establish a beach head (the opener) and funnel his value through as quickly as possible (the assumption stack) until he has an anchor in the interaction. It’s only after this he can start to flip the script and become The Chosen.

Chosen

+ Easy. High lay count. Almost entirely positive responses.

– Doesn’t travel outside the eco-system. By definition your value is higher than the girl’s. Girls are banging the image of you rather than you. Not possible for most men.

Chooser

+ Travels everywhere. Choice. Quality. Authentic connection.

– Inefficient. Hard work. Flakes. LMR. Mostly negative responses (too many for most men to stick with it).

I don’t recommend one over the other, just be aware which path is being addressed when you hear pick-up advice. Realistically you can do both at the same time. When a website is telling you to get jacked to improve the raw attractiveness of your physique that’s Chosen game. When you’re scoring a table behind the DJ in a status-whore club that’s Chosen game. When you’re using social skills to move a girl’s emotions that’s Chooser game.

Even in daygame you get both paths. Most of the time you are in Chooser mode but occasionally a girl simply IOIs you – when you jump on that it’s Chosen game. Don’t waste your time building attraction and winning her over because you already have an immediate hook. Instead you can screen hard and escalate fast.

Here’s a short video I did on my last day in Riga talking about an analogy I used with our student between Game and your favourite sport. Imagine a guy first developing an interest in boxing. He doesn’t really know what he’s watching aside from the really obvious stuff like a knockdown. He’s only capable of recognising the biggest most obvious signals. As he watches more fights (and even better, trains in a gym) he’ll start to pick up on all kinds of weaker but crucial signals such as:

• One fighter is throwing lots of fast flashy punches everytime his opponent comes near but he’s not setting his feet. This betrays his fear and lack of confidence in his power.
• The more aggressive fighter takes a hard counter right hand. His legs don’t wobble and his face never changes expression but he suddenly stops coming forward. That one hurt.

As you intelligently learn your chosen sport you begin to see what others can’t. For example, I’m told that Aussie Rules football is a deep technical game whereas to me it looks like one big fight with a football thrown into the middle. Guys who know the sport can see those subtle ebbs and flow that determine the game. So it is with The Game. The longer you spend in set, the more face-time you have with women, the more chances you take to provoke feedback…. the more you utilise your brain’s inate pattern recognition system.

So to summarise the video, there are likely three reasons why you can’ read the signal:

1. Entitlement: You don’t believe a girl like that would be attracted to and have sex with you, so you can’t process her signals telling you that’s precisely her intention. You look for over-confirmation.
2. Calibration: You are too logical and too clueless, or perhaps too drunk. You simply don’t know what you are looking for and how to distinguish the signal from the noise.
3. Model: You haven’t been properly taught the technical progression of an effective seduction model. Perhaps you’ve been sidetracked with charlatan YouTube videos or the blind-leading-the-blind of internet forums. You don’t have an expectation of what signals are thrown out by the girl and when so you aren’t receptive to them.

I’ve been writing my book of late, trying to pull all my little ideas out of my mind and get them onto paper. There’s two principles I’ve been following. Everything I write must have a monkey-see-monkey-do application, and it must be what I actually do myself. So it’s been an education. You don’t really know something until you can teach it and many ideas that seem fully-formed in your mind simply aren’t once you try and write them down. Writing definitely refines my Game.

So I recently finished the section on Attention. How to use body language to manage the attention you give to a girl so as to make her chase and keep the tension on the fishing line in the sweet spot as you reel her in. Seeing as I’m with Tom on holiday right now we’ve been talking about stuff, trying stuff out and he needs to churn out vlogs for his website.

So he roped me in and here’s some of that chapter.

The manosphere has locked itself way in an isolated wood cabin deep in the forest, introspecting deeply. Roosh recently declared it lost. Danger & Play is taking out the trash. Vox is tired of the attention whoring. I suspect there will be a purge and reboot that takes the manosphere back to the male-only space it was a couple of years ago. For my own part I have no tolerance at all for women speaking out of turn nor whiny bitch men and internet alphas. I keep my blog on-message and that means improving your life and making a dedicated effort to bang more fine young fillies. With this in mind I’ve sought guest posts from two guys who actually fuck hot women. Surprise surprise you don’t see these men menstruating all over the internet about how women are bitches. Steve’s post is here. Now let’s turn to another 150+notch self-made man to offer an outsider’s view of the manosphere….. These are words from a man who banged three new girls in the past seven days (I was next door for two of them)… Take it away Tom….

All-time great defender. All-time great striker.

There’s a good reason why top sports commentators are ex-pro sportsmen themselves. Years on the field, in the ring or inside the scrum have made them masters at their sport through ridiculous amounts of repetition, muscle memory, direct feedback and internalised technique. They’ve won their trophies, they have replaced skill with art, they’ve slaved at the coal face long enough to deserve their diamonds. Success tastes sweet precisely because of the hardships endured and lessons learned to get there.

Now take a look at the Manosphere. Blog after blog, comment after comment, by guys who’ve swallowed the red pill but complain that it tastes bitter. A painful divorce, a difficult run of relationships, one cunning girl who exploited provider tendencies – any of these things and more can trigger men to grab the medicine bottle and shove the red pill down their throats. What they didn’t do was read the health warning on the side of the red pill box:

WARNING: for this pill to work, it must be swallowed with a plentiful supply of action. Failure to take action will lead to the following side effects: bitterness, anger, keyboard jockeying and hate.

Roissy, circa-2009

Action means having to be “in it to win it.” To learn how to play tennis, you could read every book on technique out there, follow every tennis match on tv and learn past statistics for every tennis match ever played. But until you, yourself, pick up a racquet and face an opponent on a court, you won’t be able to play. A serve hitting you in the face is going to hurt. To be good at a skillset you need to fail. Lots. Again and again. It is this direct feedback that produces the muscle memory. A true understanding of Game can only come from “on the field” – it’s an experiential subject, much like a sport or a technical skill. That means thousands of hours of face-to-face interactions with women, usually over the period of one or two years. Not blog-to-blog hypothesising and debating with other bitter men online.

I’m not bragging when I say that I didn’t know what the Manosphere was until after my 80th daygame lay. Krauser’s blog introduced me to the concept and I was intrigued, although alarmed at how much online negativity and hate was involved. Same thing for the online PUA forums where keyboard jocks not only failed at taking real-world action, but amplified their woes through flame wars and bickering. An academic understanding and interest in Game is a comfort blanket, a shelter, which however leads to a sense of frustration about not playing it. Disappearing up your own arse in hypotheses and online debates is just another form of avoidance to taking action (which usually comes down to approach anxiety).

Log off. Close your laptop. Disconnect from your online life and hit the streets and bars to learn how to be social. The girl in front of you is a mirror to how you’re doing – her reactions are feedback that is worth a million times that of a commentator on your blog. Actions speak louder than words. Right now as you’re scrolling through post after post, there’s guys dragging hot girls into parks and toilets. The litmus test to whether you’re Sigma or Gamma is simply: do you spend more “Game” time offline or online?

The Gamma Manifesto, balling it with dimes

But Krauser has a blog? You write for a website? Isn’t that hypocritical? Remember the 90-10 Rule. 90% action (interactions with women) and 10% theory (blogging, commenting etc.). Any question you leave on a blog should have already been field tested by you at least five times. The reason Krauser and I don’t blog more is that we’re always outside, refining and tweaking our skillset on the streets. That’s not blowing our own trumpets. That’s a kick up the arse to get you doing the same.

When swallowed with action, the red pill becomes delicious and life-affirming. Its magical effects are beyond my wildest geek boy academic dreams. Read my journey from Oxford nerd to street seducer in my book Daygame. 100 lay reports, 464 pages, paperback.

One of these days I’ll write a proper treatise on text game just so my name gets etched into the annals of history alongside Einstein, Copernicus and Shearer. My text game fucking rocks. But before that moment comes to pass let me just talk a little about the concept of ping texting. After taking a girl’s number its usual to send out a confirmation / feeler text. The idea is to initiate a text chat which will result in setting up a date. The basic pattern goes like this:

You: feeler

Her: response, encourage

You: acknowledge, stack

Her: response, encourage

You: acknowledge, seed date

Her: response, encourage

You: logistics time

Her: accept

You: logistics place, hoop

Her: jump

That’s extremely vague so here’s an example. Bear in mind it’s your job to initiate and to move the conversation along until its natural to invite her on the date. You are leading in a particular direction. Don’t get hung up in endless chit-chat. The aim is to get a little playful momentum and proceed to the date invitation as soon as is natural.

You: So this is the crazy French girl with crazy big hair. Nice meeting you, hon 😉

Her: Hahaha, what’s so crazy about me???

You: Everything. I’m scared. My mum warned me about French girls.

Her: She’s a smart lady!!!! Haha, be careful of us!! )))

You: I shall. I wonder if you are capable of drinking an English tea like an English lady. Hmmmmm

Her: Hmmm I don’t know about that. I can try but usually I drink coffee.

You: I guess we can try. Tuesday 6pm is good?

Her: Yes, that’s good. Where?

You: Piccadilly Circus. Dress cute, so we match 😉

Her: I’m always cute! ))))

This is assuming a Yes Girl giving full compliance which of course is only true for a small proportion of numbers. Realistically she’s going to throw at least one spanner in the works be it mild (unavailable first time, suggests alternative) or strong (shit tests). That’s where the craft comes into text game and one tool in your box is the ping text. I use it under the following circumstances:

1. The hook wasn’t very strong and her reply to my feeler was non-committal or tardy. I feel its too early to push towards a date and she hasn’t picked up on my thread.
2. She replied very late, such as a few days after my ping
3. We had momentum but then she dropped off and didn’t respond.
4. She was too hard to pin down for a date either by declining the logistics or declining the date without giving a firm No.

So the ping text is a way of forcing yourself back into her mind without coming off needy and over-invested. Girls are creatures of the moment so if she’s got alot on and you aren’t a high priority then that number can go cold. So you ping her a statement about what you’re up to and you don’t ask a question. Just throw it out there. Examples:

• “I just saw a man walk into a lamppost. I thought that only happened in comedy shows”
• “Just saw a cat that walks like you… weird”
• “I’m lying in my hammock, sipping Pims. I love summer!!”
• “Don’t ever join a queue behind a group of Italian tourists. Jesus, what a fanny on!”
• “There was a little girl sitting next to me throwing a tantrum. I gave her a stern look and she just stopped. I don’t know if I’m a good or bad guy now.”
• “There’s a dog following me home from the shop. He’s really big and shaggy. Cute.”

If a number goes cold throw one of these out to see if she responds. If it’s still blank give her a week’s roll-off then try another. If that doesn’t get a response, she’s just not into you.

It’s a small world out there. I’d estimate there’s maybe ten guys in the whole of London who go out regularly and have consistent repeatable success at daygame. Guys sexing up genuinely pretty women who learned daygame in the PUA sense of the word. Sure there’s a bunch of non-community guys getting laid off meeting girls in the street (naturals, good-lookers etc), a bunch getting one-in-a-million Hollywood moments but not consistently, and of course a bunch of extreme number farmers with little skill but high workrate. Oh, plus the PUA charlatans and the noobs.

However if you narrow the field to guys who have real daygame skill, can get laid regularly with desireable girls and actually choose that lifestyle then its a small world. And we all know each other. Here’s an interview with the latest guy to join the club…..

If you haven’t already then watch this infield first. That’ll clear up the “who is this guy” question.

I probably didn’t press Sam enough to bring out the hard facts but the TL:DR version is this: 19 year old virgin does a bootcamp and then commits to daygame. After six months the daygame lays begin to trickle in. Eighteen months later he’s banged eighteen girls and is dating a catwalk model.

I remember back in 1998 when I first lived in London in a zone three houseshare one of the lads moved out and we put a classified ad up to replace him. One of the couples scoping the room was from Croatia. The dude was a normal guy. Tall-ish, slim, fairly well dressed. Nothing special one way or the other, seemed pleasant. The woman was stunning. Proper drop-dead gorgeous. At the time I wasn’t envious. It never even entered my brain I could compete for a girl like that.

An exaggeration, yesterday

More recently (post-game) those girls have been in my sights. Since clambering up the fuck ladder from 6s, to 7s, to 8s I’ve been looking at the hotter girls of God’s green earth feeling like that’s what I ought to be dating. And occasionally I have. Sometimes, however, I’d see normal couples walking around where the girl is hot and I’d get a little pang of envy. Even if I’d fucked six girls of equal quality already that year I’d look at her, look at him, and get a bit narked. That’s not good.

So my mind turns and I think about these couples. Mostly I realise this: when you see a fairly nondescript guy with a hot girlfriend you are seeing him at his peak. That is the hottest girl he’ll ever fuck. He’s probably hanging onto her for dear life, terrified that if he loses her then he’ll never get such sweet pussy again. I’m talking about normal chodes here, not guys who clearly have their shit together. I know this because I was that chode when my ex-wife was a clear two points higher than any other girl I’d fucked at that point.

When we do game we are giving girls a proposition they wouldn’t normally entertain:

• Talk to me, a guy you don’t know from Adam, for a while and give your number
• Come on a date, maybe two…. then fuck
• And I promise you nothing

That’s a mighty big ask. Sure, it’s well within the realm of biomechanical parameters but it’s still a big ask. And we expect to pull it off once or twice a month with the youngest-hottest-tightest girls that we meet. We are paying peanuts and expecting princesses. Sometimes we pull it off.

Now put your Blue Pill glasses on and look at the price the typical chode pays for his girlfriend:

• Exclusivity
• Berated for looking at other girls
• Buying her stuff, meeting her family, going to Ikea on Saturday afternoon
• Putting up with her shit, and her insufferable friends’ shit
• Letting her keep her own frame
• Spending all of his precious finite life with her

He’s not doing her in the ass while slapping her face and calling her a bitch. She’s not overwhelming him with thoughtful affection and favours. He’s on a leash. That’s the price he pays for his pussy. When you learn game there are simple metrics that measure your progress.

More girls, hotter girls, less work, less drama.