Evolution 1: Frustrated

Part One of Four: The Plateau I’ve Reached And How I’m Tackling It

There’s a progression to a man’s formal acquisition of game that goes something like this: First you don’t have the balls to approach, but eventually you start barrelling in and mostly can’t hook. Next you start getting conversations but the girls won’t give out real numbers. Then you get numbers but no dates, then a bunch of Day 2s but no kisses and the girls don’t call you back, and often when they do you’re LJBF’d. Eventually you hit the stage where you can proceed all the way through from approach to sex with a reasonable consistency.

The point is that it’s a linear process. You get good at A1, and that gets you the opportunity to start learning A2 and so on. In the background is your ongoing inner game work which raises the tide for all stages. I’m trying to break out of the “day 2s that lead nowhere” problem. I’m banging some girls but nowhere near as many as I should. To give an example by summarising my past ten days:

Saturday: Two approaches as a demo to student on a bootcamp. The apocalypse doesn’t stick but the normal indirect-direct does and I get a Facebook. Good interaction but goes nowhere on the follow up.

Sunday: Three approaches. One Facebook (turns into a Day 2 a week later) and one instant date with consequent number close and Facebook add. This latter girl then deletes me without comment (and before I did any follow up) and it’s a dead end.

Wednesday: Five approaches. One Facebook where I’m currently doing light comfort and attraction over the chat function. One Facebook where she added me but no reply to my first teaser mail. One kiss close that I never saw again. Two conversations that went nowhere.

Saturday: Three approaches. One instant date and one number but neither girl returned my two follow up calls. One conversation with no close.

Sunday: Day 2 with the Lithuanian. Two long phone conversations with two targets I’d Day 2’d a few weeks earlier.

Tuesday: Day 3 with a girl who had done the instant date and Day 2, then deleted me from Facebook, then called me up unexpectedly and asked for the date. I get an unexpected series of texts from another girl who I’d assumed was a dead end as she’d never agreed a day 2.

So the total sarge score from this period is: Seventeen approaches, twelve number/FB/kiss closes, six insta-dates/day 2s, no sex. Or to tabulate it:

1. Lithuanian barmaid: Facebook, follow up, day 2, seems to be going cold.
2. Russian model: Number, dead end.
3. Russian student: Number, insta-date, Facebook, dead end.
4. English girl: Facebook but not accepted the add, dead end.
5. Italian waitress: Facebook, follow up, potential day 2
6. Jordanian shots girl: Facebook, gone cold
7. English student: Kiss, dead end
8. Colombian student: Insta-date, number, seems to be going cold
9. Black girl: Number, Facebook, day 2 and 3, dead end
10. Aussie fashion girl: Number, Facebook, day 2 and 3, still in play [update - just kiss closed. Hot lead]
11. Taiwanese hairdresser: Number, insta-date, Facebook, day 2 and 3, still in play [50/50 I'd guess]
12. Polish student: Number, Facebook, many texts. Warmed up a little

Lest I convey the wrong impression, I’m not unhappy with my progress. Every single one of these girls is hot (four of them smoking hot) and I’ve essentially been able to create twelve prospects from seventeen opens which is an extremely high hit rate for such quality stock. The problem is I’m then fucking up / failing to capitalise. Anyone who’s read this blog from the beginning will have a good idea what these success barriers / inner game issues / skill gaps are.

It’s frustrating as hell. I know it’s a plateau and I know that when I look backwards I see a long hard trail that I’ve already walked and needs not be walked again. That’s all behind me, the progress is locked in. Just one year ago, even in my wildest dreams never would I have thought I could go and rack up a prospect list like that in less than two weeks / twenty approaches.

But damn, shouldn’t I be fucking at least one of these girls?

NB – This was written three weeks ago. Follow up posts coming soon

Definitely not sarging tonight

I get a call from Subzero cos he’s back from Tokyo and wants to go out. I tell him I’m in no mood for sarging – we’ll just go to a bar in Old Street and have a drink. Chat, catch up – be like normal people. My mood is good and we’re sitting back in the beer garden when a fairly cute waitress comes over to take our drinks order. Hmmmmm. Reflexively I start teasing her about her accent and then do a few interesting rapport exchanges. She forgets about her job and chats to us for ten minutes. I file away the interaction and remind myself I’m not sarging. An hour later the sun goes down and we head inside to sit on some sofas. I open a pair of unremarkable Aussies next to me.

Krauser: ‘cuse me ladies. Just a quick question. When I say to you the word “hazing” what images does it conjure up?
Girls: Ummm. Hazing? Er, I’m not sure.
Krauser: You see me and my friend were discussing it and it makes us think of initiation parties and broom handles.

They laugh, chat for a minute then I say thanks and turn away. I’m not sarging, remember.

Fun girl

The waitress comes over and Subzero orders a round while I’m having a piss. As I sit down to my new beer she comes back with the change. I tease her again and she’s IOIing me. I let her go but there’s a crowd of people in the way and as she asks two chodes to move they start hitting on her. Really needy embarassing stuff. It’s happening about four feet in front of us and she looks uncomfortable. They give up after a minute but she’s still standing there trying to plot a route through the crush. Fuck it I think. I lean over and whack her on the back of the thighs

Krauser: C’m ere!
Waitress: *smiles, comes over, bends over to get eye-to-eye, brushes hair behind ear*
Krauser: This road trip I’m planning. Where was it you said I should go?
Waitress: [her hometown]
Krauser: Thanks. Mind, if I don’t enjoy it I’m gonna hold you personally responsible. What’s there to see?

Another few minutes and I add her to Facebook. A few days later we have a follow up chat. We are getting bored sitting down so me and Subzero stand in the middle of the bar. Four asian girls walk past a chode crystal and the bravest chode taps a straggler and says hello. The girl pauses awkwardly then keeps walking. Fail. As the girls walk past us I whisper to Subzero “this is how its done”. I grab the straggler by the elbow and yank her over to me. Her friends look back, shrug and leave her to me. My opener?

Krauser: C’m ‘ere!

The boat she's fresh off, perhaps

That’s a nice ten minute set with some kino escalation, DHVs and so on. A cute Japanese girl fresh off the boat. We swap Facebooks and I walk out, it being home time and I’m not sarging tonight. Once we get to the platform at Old Street station the noticeboard informs us it’s over five minutes till the next train. I see a short English girl waiting next to us. Unremarkable but cute in her own way. I stare at her until she notices me and gets self-conscious.

Cute

Krauser: *shakes head ruefully* I don’t like your dress.
Girl: *realises I’m hamming it up, giggles*
Krauser: Yeah, you’re kinda cute but it’s not helping you.

It’s a beautifully orchestrated sarge with the right helpings of DHVs, teases, light kino, compliments and so on. There’s a young couple behind us who watch the whole thing like live entertainment with the dude providing a running commentary to his girl. I take her Facebook and have a chat with her the next day but I won’t pursue it because I’m not sarging. Me and Subzero get on the train and there’s two girls standing in front of us chatting animatedly about their night. The unremarkable blonde is doing most of the talking and her much cuter Indian friend is holding a kebab in a polystyrene box. I’m just chatting with Subzero about the last UFC until finally after five minutes I feel compelled to open:

Krauser: Excuse me ladies. If you’re not going to eat that kebab can I have it?
Girls: *laughs* It’s rude to cadge people’s food.
Krauser: *to blonde* You’re a yank aren’t you
Yank: *faux-outrage* That’s so rude.

I take the Facebooks of both girls then go home and sleep. Sometimes I really enjoy a normal night out with no pressure to open sets.

Chimpanzee game with the Japanese

I’m convinced I’m a fucking chimpanzee. I’ll explain. It’s a commonly quoted statistic, true or not, that we humans share 95% of our DNA with our long-armed hairy tea-making brethren (and no, i don’t mean Johnny Wisdom). So why is it that humans built civilisation, landed on the moon and have tiny plastic devices that send words and images around the world whereas chimps are sitting in cages flinging their shit at each other. Or wearing suits and making cups of tea?

Krauser on an instadate

Clearly the 5% of DNA we don’t share is of paramount importance.

I think that’s where I am with my game. The fundamentals are there, the behaviours are there and I’m doing essentially the same thing as the top day gamers when I’m in set. However, I’m not banging anywhere near as many girls as I ought to be. I’m metaphorically just flinging my shit around. So I have to figure out that remaining critical 5% and integrate it. Thus I’ve booked in a 1-on-1 with a guy who is touted as London’s best pick up artist. We’ll see how that goes.

The missing 5% really smarted on my day 2 with the Japanese 2 set. I did a ten minute pick up last Saturday but more or less wrote it off when they said they were going home a day later. I get lucky and a volcano erupts in Iceland covering Europe in a blanket of dust. I swear there wasn’t this much dust over Europe since the Jews were hiding under floorboards. So the girls’ flight is delayed. On Tuesday at midnight I get a call from Sakae saying she wants to meet (that’s the one on the left in the video with the hair tied back and no fringe). Hmmmm. They are doing a day trip to Bath on Wednesday but we make a date for Thursday evening. She asks if she can bring her friend Midori and I say I’ll bring along Suave. They will fly home on Friday so this is looking 50/50 for a lay.

I put on my best clobber and meet them on Oxford Street at half six, with Suave turning up later. Language is strained because they barely speak English. Fortunately my Japanese carries it and I lead them off to the milkshake bar. Things progress nicely as I DHV, tease and put them at ease. We move on to a nearby pub and I give some statements of interest to Sakae and get them to spin around while I rate their fashion out of ten. Like the delightful Japanese girls they are, they are giggling, batting eyelids and doing a show of demure girlish femininity that far outpaces anything an English-speaking girl can manage. I’m reminded why I went through a ten-year stretch of banging nothing but Japanese during my twenties. As much as I’ve been discovering the delights of Eastern Europeans and Mediterraneans I’ve definitely still got the Japs at number one on the world bangability rankings.

We move on to a nearby pub and by now I’ve clearly shown different eye contact and vocal tone with the target. Suave shows up and within five minutes he’s sitting hand in hand with Midori and she’s touching him and giggling with that heady exuberance of a girl in the presence of a man she believes is her superior. Despite sitting next to them, Sakae and I are in isolation. We’re also hand in hand, her leg is thrown over mine and the eye contact is crackling with sexuality. I’m thinking this is close to a done deal. We bounce to a members bar (where the staff must be really wondering about me, cos I show up a couple of times a week with a different hot girl every time). I have Sakae on my sofa and Suave has Midori on his. We might as well be in different venues. I kino escalate on Sakae while across from me Suave and Midori are overcoming the language barrier with childish magic tricks and other body language. It’s cute to watch because Midori is loving it, desperate to fuck, and turning on all the girlish charm she can muster. I get Sakae out into the lobby and try the kiss close.

Krauser, recently

Rebuffed! She apologies, says she’s got a boyfriend in Japan (true – I saw photos of them as she was skipping through her digital camera). I try to defuse it and try again. Still rebuffed. The forebrain/hindbrain conflict is going on because she remains hugging me, shows no sign of wanting to disengage, pupils dilating, but she just won’t kiss. I walk her back into the lounge and Suave has kissed Midori and they are now oh-so-subtley rubbing each other’s crotches underneath a cushion placed over their laps. We stay there another hour and I get rebuffed on another two kiss attempts but its all good natured. Finally at 10pm they leave cos they are getting an early flight. We walk them back to the station and that’s that.

I think if my game had been a little tighter, or if I’d had one more date, then this would’ve been an f-close regardless of the boyfriend. Her forebrain was only just barely holding back the roar of her pussy tingle and her self resolve was fading minute by minute. Oh well, live and learn. I’ve got a Day 2 with a different Jap tomorrow evening.

Wimminz be deluded

I remember being in a statistics class at university. The lecturer stood there in front of us he demolished our self-images as special snowflakes. Quoting figures with actuarial precision he looked around the room and said x% of you will marry a work colleague, x% will emigrate, x% will die of a self-inflicted ailment and many other aggregate predictions. I put my hand up and said “If 4% of men are gay and there’s fifty men in this room, which two are they?” He responded that any individual life is difficult to predict but aggregation imposes a predictable pattern onto social groups. Whatever, I was just trying to be the smart-arse.

The point is this: There’s a limited range of common life trajectories, and most people conform more or less to pattern. This is inevitable. We have hard-wired biological impulses that drive us in certain directions, we have social institutions that make a narrow range of paths the easy option and all others difficult, and then we have a limited range of cultural archetypes to aspire to. People just aren’t very different.

While reading this attention-whoring wail of toe I was reminded of a specific case.

The Enemy of Man and Woman

Feminism has created it’s own female archetype, which I call the Bitter Twisted Harpy, the pioneers of whom are now entering their dotage. The trajectory is thus:

The Pure
Age 0 to 15: Progressively absorb the cultural Marxism and vagina-entitlement of Western society without realising it, but be forbidden by society from acting out upon it.

The Trainee Slut
Age 15-18: Experiment with boys, who you still like, test the limits of your freedom and have a great time while being held back a little by natural impulses against bad behaviour and a poorly-formed self esteem.

The Useful Idiot
Age 19-23: Acquire a conscious intellectual sense of entitlement (feminism), manufacture a resentment against teh patreearchee, live a soft life parasitical upon parents and taxpayers, and build an enormous edifice of haughty arrogance to hide the fragile ego within. Obtain considerable validation from men and begin to overcome the instinctive constraints on slutty behaviour.

The Whore
Age 24-29: Full-on alpha-chasing and sport fucking while holding down a worthless paper-shuffling non-job in the public sector or a joke industry (HR, advertising, non-profits etc). Increased divergence between perceived and actual sexual market value based upon conflation of sexual value with relationship value. Growing resentment at being pumped and dumped, decreased ability to pair bond, gnawing fear grows towards terror at the vacuity of such a worthless existence.

The Sobering Drunk
Age 30: Baby rabies hits hard. Last gasp attempt to snag an alpha.

The Femo-Cultist
Age 31-34: Suspension of reality and retreat into denial via Sex and the City, Bridget Jones Diary, Cosmo and internet dating. Various rationalisations of having a successful career, having high standards and liking the person that experience has made them. A renewed dedication to go out partying and find a man. Much desperation and making a fool of oneself ensures.

Female. Aged 34.

The Cornered Animal
Age 35: High speed collision into The Wall. Absolute panic. Choices now reduced to (i) a skin-crawling beta and his wallet (ii) IVF intentional single-motherhood (iii) paternity trapping a careless player or worst of all (iv) buying cats and writing a feminist blog.

The Condemned
Age 36-40: A sustained period of regret, despair and hollowness. Compulsive sharing of one’s story while abjectly failing to learn the lessons thereof.

The Witch
Age 41+: Gradual withdrawal from social life and resignation to occupying a similar social rung as the Omega male.

None of this is inevitable but at each stage the woman is acting upon delusions of her own self-worth and with a painful lack of awareness about the ensuing stages she is commiting herself to. As my gift to the young women of our decadent collapsing society, allow me to offer the following advice.

The Pure – Follow your creative and positive impulses to like those around you, to listen to daddy, and to be wary of the bad girls.
The Trainee Slut – Remember you feel dirty and guilty after sex for a reason. Don’t let your friends bullshit you that you a stuck up loser if you don’t co-sign their bullshit. Boys will like you more if you don’t have sex.
The Useful Idiot – Recognise that life never gets easier than this and it will never be this easy again. You are riding the crest of a wave and should look to lock-in the best man you find. It’s downhill from here.
The Whore – Don’t come near me you disgusting skank. Ok, if I must offer advice here it is: accept you are nowhere near as fabulous as you think and these guys are just sport fucking you and that’s why your relationships don’t last. Each passing year you lose more of your eggs and the quality of man you can retain reduces. Learn to settle – you might still get a good guy. And learn some fucking wife skills so he has a reason to spend time with you that doesn’t involve fucking.
The Sobering Drunk – Stay off the bottle. You are in the last chance saloon. Grasp the moment.
The Femo-Cultist – You have now become my enemy. Fuck off. If you want to step off the juggernaught before it hits the wall you need to reconcile yourself to settling for a beta and popping that first kid out as soon as possible. Remove other Femo-Cultists from your life – they do not want you to be happy.
The Cornered Animal – You are officially fucked. You will never achieve the happiness and contentment of a passionate pair-bond with a high quality man who loves you, nor will you raise happy well-adjusted children. The best you can get is a guy ten years older than you who is equally desperate for kids.
The Condemned – You primary goal is to avoid disgracing yourself in public and driving all of your friends away from you. You are already a leper, so try to be a polite one. Develop life skills such as intriguing conversation, cooking and dependability. If you are useful and agreeable to those around you then you’ll not suffer ostracization. Avoid at all costs the various panic plays: a round-the-world cruise, a Spanish waiter, mistressing to an old businessman, cougardom.
The Witch – There’s no way back. Nothing you can do.

Lest this seem harsh readers should remember there is a far better, far easier life trajectory available to 95% of women which up until forty years ago was called “normal”. It still exists in the mythical fantasia called Nonanglosphereland:

Grow up, be nice. Have tentative relationships with boys you like. When you’re about 22 declare your fact-finding period over and start evaluating all future boyfriends for their marriage potential. Junk the careerist bullshit and focus upon getting a ring through a process of (i) being a woman a man would want to marry and (ii) screening out men who aren’t marriageable. Commit early and ease into the housewife / mother role without a fuss. Enjoy the fruits of a long stable relationship with the most important man in your life.

Seeing as most Western women seem incapable of comprehending such a plan, much less actioning it. Here’s a bullet point list in simple language

  • Don’t get fat
  • Try to look pretty
  • Be nice
  • Don’t put out until at least the fifth date
  • Develop wife skills
  • Avoid bad boys
  • Avoid bad girls
  • Don’t fuck more than one man a year
  • Never ever fuck on the same day you met the guy under any circumstance
  • Don’t pursue a career

I’m on a roll!

Last Friday I did five sets and number-closed / facebooked four including a hired gun. Nice work when I only meant to go out to see a friend and not do any approaches. I might do a post on that. I wake up on Saturday to more glorious weather and I’m feeling good. I stop by the corner shop to buy a packet of Tootie Frooties (my weekend treat) and sit down on the Underground train to eat them. I notice the hot Persian girl next to me varnishing her nails. She shakes them dry.

Krauser: You know it looks like you’re trying to talk to deaf people.

I hear they prefer anal

She laughs, hooks immediately and starts shaking my hands in the air. Good indirect set and I take her Facebook. I walk into town to meet Suave and Shammers. After a quick coffee we head into Covent Garden for some daygame. My state is fantastic and I start tearing it up. The following videos show every set I did that day, except one (a thirty second 1-set that went nowhere).

What does gaming greatness look like?

Successful game fundamentally comes down to a simple equation:

Alphaness + Experience + Courtship Navigation = Game

Let’s break it down.

Alphaness.
Most men are sackless losers. It’s an unpleasant reality we are anaesthetised against through massive social conditioning that both programs us to become sackless losers and coos placating noises to us that this is a natural desirable state of affairs. It is the male side of the universal law of gender parity, namely, across every epoch the men and women of a given culture deserve each other. Western men are sackless losers, western women are vile animals. I’m talking trends, not absolutes.

To achieve success with that rapidly-thinning herd of pleasant, pretty, feminine women a man needs to be worthy of her. This isn’t supplication, because a woman so described is also working hard to be worthy of such a man. You must be able to answer the question “why should she like you?

Classically taught outer game is avoiding this question by teaching routines and fakery as a shortcut to a woman’s bed. There’s some success to be had there. In fact if you really excel in such trickery you can bang a bevy of skanks and even the occasional hottie. Unfortunately you’ll remain the same sackless loser you always were, and thus always be pissing into the wind every single set unless somewhere along the way you start working on the alphaness. Most aspiring PUAs do eventually tumble to this truth. It would be a lot easier if it was commonly accepted and thus we could just start from that point and get on with the grunt work of the Beta2Alpha transition.

Incidentally, I think that’s why most naturals are hostile to and dismissive of “gamers”. They see the latter avoiding the question entirely and building up the shell of fakery. Because many naturals already have alphaness they also know they are above gamers in the male domination hierarchy.

Experience
Kevin Rooney (Leg-Iron Mike Tyson’s first trainer) said it takes a fighter ten years before he truly learns to relax in the ring. There’s an analogous process in game in which it takes 1,000 approaches to truly relax in set. No amount of alphaness will score you consistent girls in and of itself, nor protect you from their predations. You still have to get the airtime, hit the roadblocks, fail a lot, try new things, get yourself calibrated. You can’t learn to swim without getting wet. Until you get the comfort born from experience, the natural alpha will be inhibited through unfamiliarity and your brain will be spinning wildly so you mix up your courtship navigation.

Naturals and alphas (not quite synonyms) have usually accrued lots of experience since sexual maturity and thus it’s easy to conflate them but experience must still be sought through dedicating time and energy to approaching. You can spend as long as you want in your Power of Now cave dialling in your nimbus but you’ll stumble like a new-born foal for the first few hundred approaches regardless. Book learning and introspection aren’t enough. Cool clothes and a fighter’s body aren’t either.

Courtship Navigation
This is the principle advance of the Mystery Method. A girl might really like you, you might be extremely relaxed and confident, but you must still proceed through the linear stages of the human courtship ritual to get her legs at quarter-to-three. Therefore you must develop strong pre-approach and opening, stack and transition well, engage in interesting conversation that invests her and demonstrate higher value. Recognising some IOIs you can progress to comfort, close, then proceed to further comfort and seduction. Classic game. For historical reasons there is an inordinate focus on this element at the expense of the others. Thus the common site of PUA buzzing beta bees doing the dancing monkey routine on girls and just looking plain weird.

Alphaness + Experience = Natural game but little control over the process so lots of girls who seem strongly into you seem to flake out and go nowhere while others jump on your cock. It’s never clear why the same behaviours lead to divergent outcomes.
Alphaness + Courtship Navigation = Girls hook and give you the airtime and IOIs but you feel like a social robot. The connection is not comfortably made and the girls sense some weirdness. You have to railroad the girls through the stages and anytime the contact is broken, so is the spell.
Experience + Courtship Navigation = Lots of hookups with low quality women and a constant uphill struggle to work work work every set. The girls never seem to come to you and you’re constantly in a chasing frame (while projecting practiced aloofness).
Alphaness + Experience + Courtship Navigation = Wham bamn. Girls hook easily and you slide consistently through the stages to regular sex with women worthy of your time.

The above is talking about standard vanilla game from cold approach to an LTR, which is the skill set I most covet. There are other ways to skin the cat that are more attuned to difficult to reproduce peculiarities of the guy in question. For example a big young good-looking guy can just eye-fuck and then escalate while cutting out all the other stuff (Moran, I’m talking about you fella!) but not many PUAs have that option on the menu. A stripclub owner could work his employees like a band member can work his groupies, but what use is that to most guys?

Further options open up if you are willing to fuck club skanks, fatties and cougars. Each to his own. I am talking about a skill set that a genetically average (and perhaps older) guy can use to obtain regular sober sex with the highest quality women (7s to 10s who don’t ride the cock carousel) in the prime of their sexual market value (18 to 24 years old). That’s a tall order and requires an extensive skill set that brooks no short cuts.

Taiwan Day 3

I’d written off this target because while she’d accepted all the kino up to handholding on the way back to the station on Day 2, she had refused the kiss. Actually, she’d stood there with lips pressed tightly together and accepted a weird 4th Grader peck. DLV.

There were also some other things that meant I really didn’t feel the reward justified the costs. I’d go into them, but they are kinda private for her – she really opened up to me about the details of her life so I guess I should respect that privacy. As I bid farewell at the tube station at the end of Day 2 (about midnight) I told her to send me a text that she got home safe. I always do this – shows a protective spirit.

Starting to grow on me

HB 12:57am: I’m home safe Krauser. Thanks took me to the relax place, made me want to be a member too! Night x
Krauser 7:50am: Cool. I had fun too.  Some detachment after failing kiss close.

I decide I should probably at least try to progress so I wait a couple of days and pick up the ball again:

Krauser 1:28pm: I reckon a bit of food next time. Implicit invite.
HB 2:02pm: Lots food even better.
Krauser 7:19pm: Just don’t go stealing food off my plate, ok? I’m free Monday evening
HB 10:36am: I’m only free on 13th April the Tuesday afternoon [over 2 weeks away] She’d said how busy she is but is this just a shit test?
Krauser 11:49am: I’ll be at work in the afternoon. Till six.  Just the facts ma’am.
HB 9:18pm: Hi Krauser, maybe we can have dinner after you finish work, without try lip kiss and hold hands, just like a normal friend so you can relax and no need to try anything on me, if that is ok for you. I’m fully booked before I go back home, so this will be the only time I can offer so far. I hope you well. God bless you.

Sounds like quite a brush off. I wait three days then respond:

Krauser 11:15pm: Yeah, could be fun.
HB 11:21pm next day: Your reply was on the apple fool day. So yeah means yes or no really?
Krauser 11:41pm: Oh, I didn’t realise. Yes.  If the connection is still there, no reason to break it.
HB 11:42pm: Where are we going to meet up? I will arrive Waterloo in the afternoon.
HB 11:43pm: How are you? Saw your Facebook about you handed the notice, anything that I can pray for you?
Krauser 11:44pm: No rush, not meeting for another 10 days. I’m great. Very happy to be quitting.  Positive and unconcerned frame. She’s already decided I’m a player so I should act congruently with that.
HB 11:45pm: Keep happy. Night x

What the hell do I make of this? She’s an ex-party girl with a finely tuned player radar and thus strongly responsive to alphaness, yet she’s also tried (and failed) to settle down and then turned to god and thus wants a stable nice guy. The classic front brain / hind brain conflict. So I figure my overt stance should play to the nice guy while the body language and subtext is bad boy. She seems a nice girl but probably too much hassle, so I’m thinking I’ll treat her like a crash test dummy – meaning I will try a higher risk strategy because I don’t care if I fuck up.

Don’t get me wrong – this girl has a lovely tight ass and will be a fucking raging demon in the sack – I do want to fuck her. There’s just only so much I’m prepared to invest so I leave it at that. She deletes me from Facebook – only the third time it’s ever happened. And then, April 13th rolls around and as I’m walking to work my phone vibrates:

HB 8:31am: Morning stranger! Are we still doing the dinner thing or milkshake thing today then? Have a good day  She’s investing and bringing the energy. Qualification.
Krauser 8:35pm: Yeah, I’m in.  Nice words, bad boy subtext.
HB 8:36am: Haha so how we going to meet?
Krauser 8:37am: What time can you get to Piccadilly? Direct. Don’t waste words.
HB 8:38am: 2ish
Krauser 8:38am: pm?
HB 8:38am: Ya
Krauser 8:39am: I finish work at 5. How about we meet at St Paul’s Cathedral then? Meet me on my terms.
HB 8:40am: OK :) have fun at work!
Krauser 8:40am: Ok. See you soon :) Reward her good behaviour.

A normal exchange but what’s the subtext? Why delete me from Facebook, see me show no attempt to rebuild the connection, and then suddenly show strong commitment to seeing me again? Is there a time-delay pussy tingle detonating? Later that day:

HB 1:05pm: Which is the station near by the cathedral?
Krauser 1:06pm: Haha. Guess. It was a retarded question so I’m being nice here.
HB 1:06pm: Liverpool station.  Retard.
Krauser 1:07pm: St pauls
HB 1:10pm: I know but there are few same name when I serch it, just tell me please. Such player!  Oh, sounds like a little banter is being struck up. Shift to attraction game…
Krauser 1:12pm: Central Line. Shall I send a limousine to pick up the princess?
HB 1:15pm: Hahaha, I don’t like them, old English mini will do :) central line which station?
Krauser 1:20pm: Ok – St Pauls station, central line. Do you need GPS coordinates too?  Subtext = she’s a retard and I’m just about tolerating it. Playful.
Krauser 1:21pm: Btw, wear something nice. I’m dressed like a tramp and one of us needs to look good. Pull her into my leading frame, make her qualify to impress me, underline that I don’t give a fuck about stuff.
HB 1:26pm: I think I look nice hahaha
HB 1:36pm: I wear something like Spartan, hope is nice to you.  Yeah, interesting.
Krauser 1:37pm: Cool. I’ll wear red Speedoes.  Worked for Gerard Butler.
HB 1:38pm: Check you out, I will kiss you if you do! Nice one  Interesting that she brings that up. What’s the maxim in Game – “If she’s talking about sex, that means she’s thinking about having sex with YOU”?
Krauser 1:41pm: Heh. That depends how sexy YOU look. I look AWESOME in Speedoes. Like Borat Run with it, force her to think of my in underwear but release the tension with a push/joke
HB 1:48pm: Awesome! I love borat. I’m not sexy type btw, more like Taiwanese type. “I’m not a party girl anymore, even though I obviously am”
Krauser 1:52pm: Yeah, Taiwanese are not sexy. A nation of librarians and lawyers. Push her away, screening frame – but playful
HB 2:03pm: Shame, can’t do kiss then. Beta bait.
Krauser 2:05pm: Maybe just some light touching and shy smiles. I’ll call you and raise you.
HB 2:09pm: The weather is awesome.  Not sure about this. Is she banking that little bit of escalation (a good thing) or snipping the thread to avoid it (a bad thing)?
Krauser 2:13pm: Like summer. Squirrels running up trees, geese wandering around the lake. I love it.  Positive imagery. No questions.
HB 2:14pm: Hmmm, such a waste because you work and I am going to enjoy it! Tease to regain her superiority
Krauser 2:20pm: Take a few photos to show me. Try to catch a squirrel.  Put her into her place as trying to impress me.

I meet this girl and she’s dressed nice. For the first hour or so things are slightly awkward because I’m trying not to show interest and she’s being a little sassy and guarded. We walk down to the South Bank and to an old school pub. I’m having to carry the conversation and gradually she loosens up and invests until by the end of the pint she’s really into it. Before showing up I’d already made the decision that either she chases me or nothing happens – I’m not gonna kino escalate – so I settle into a strong alpha frame and the DHVs are all subtle. I’m not even sure what my goal is (obviously I’d like to fuck her, I just don’t want to jump through any hoops to do so) but I sort of settle on befriending, entouraging, and then letting her come to me over the course of the next couple of months.

We walk on to Pizza Express and things really change. She’s IOIing like crazy including an almost comical wanking of her glass of water – over and over again for about ten minutes. She pinkens a little, changes her posture to be more alluring, suddenly gets itchy around her neck. All of the classic non verbal signs. It helps that I keep dropping in casual conversation about fucking.

As we walk out she’s grabbing onto my arms and doing the whole doe-eyed please-protect-me little girl stuff (which I love) and as we say goodbye at the tube station she’s in a deep hug with me, face tilted up to me, lips almost touching. The kiss close was there for the taking but I’m thinking “no, you rebuffed me last time, this time I rebuff you”. She wants to come out again on Saturday.

When I get home she re-adds me to Facebook and messages. I accept and we have a one-hour chat session (while I’m also chatting with the Aussie and Italian). That gets more overtly sexual and it’s clear that she’s seriously turned on while trying to hold herself back. The classic forebrain-hindbrain conflict. The whole time I’ve made it clear I’m a player and pick up girls. Much of the Day 3 conversation was about technical aspects of game and me telling stories from actual sets. It kinda solidifies that central tenet of game – it’s the hindbrain that determines the lay, and preselection helps trigger it. Doesn’t much matter if her forebrain thinks you’re a womaniser, its pussy tingle uber alles. I’m kinda pleased to get this girl back in play.

This is what entitlement looks like

Readers may be aware of this girl I’ve been gaming. She was a night-time street game close and followed up with two dates. I found her difficult and unimpressive except that when the banter got going I found it was lots of fun and made the interaction worthwhile. The subtext was her demanding she be the prize and that I supplicate to her. Not only do I refuse out of general principle, but she just isn’t all that. Too old, and pretty but not especially hot and not especially my type.

A practice set.

We’d had a couple of phone calls in the past week and then I get this mail over Facebook. I’ll try not to pre-frame it. Just read for yourself and think what it shows about me, her, and her perception of reality and her place within it. Extrapolate that attitude into the likely trajectory of her life. Consider the assumptions she makes about the relative value I do or should place upon her, and the position she expects me to occupy.

To make it easy, I’ve underlined all insults. Not banter – plain mean-spirited insults. I’ve also italicised shaming language and bolded historical revisionism. Take it away darlin’……..

Hi thanks for the invitation it looks good Krauser but I won’t be there on Saturday.
Krauser I’m going to be completely honest with you….. after our conversation on Thursday night towards the end mostly, I found very uncomfortable and the way you responded towards me when I mentioned the way I see myself and the kind of guy I like to date, I found your comments thought provoking I was disappointed.

What I would say on a good note would be that the other times we have chatted by email, text and the first time on the phone I found you engaging and fun to talk too, but you also appeared to lack gentleman qualities (I have been meaning to have this chat with you I guess now seems to be the right time)

When we meet in Oxford ST, for the first time you took me to get something to eat, the first thing you said to me was not how was your day! or you at least trying to make me feel comfortable, instead the first thing you said was IM ONLY PAYING FOR THE MILKSHAKE AND THE REST YOUR ON YOUR OWN that was scatty and undignified … and if you thought that was bad you did not exercise any courtesy when I was choosing from the menu you told the waiter that I’m indecisive. At that point I was about to leave in 10min. Never in my life have I experience something quite like that. However I was meeting up with friends later so I decided to stay and if it got worst I was going to leave. Lucky for me I was in a good mood that day and I did not leave my house thinking this was a date so I was shocked when you told me a few days later that it was. When we went to [members club] you some how unexpectedly redeemed yourself a little, the conversations was better and you came across as some one who has depth to him and the cube thing I found quite interesting. (But know doubt I am sure you use it all the time) if I’m completely honest that was the only reason why I agreed to meet up again but on my terms as friends.
However between that time until Thursdays conversation I felt we kind of got along conversation wise as friends, we shared some good banter and I found you in some way a little fascinating, so its disappointing how you represented yourself in our talk that night you came across like a Jerk once again. Krauser I don’t wish to spend my time with a guy who views pretty women as scoring boards, as opportunities to getting laid. But someone who respect and even likes women and who values relationships and friendships.
Base on all I have said, I think its best we don’t meet again.
I wish you all the best and hope the next time you meet some one nice you treat her respectfully because if she is special, then the first few things you show her counts in her eyes and if it works out, believe me you would not regret it because you would of found something precious.

Take care
HB Entitled

Ok, now stop for a moment and reflect upon what she just said. Consider how she feels as she clicks the Send button to let me have a piece of her mind. What was motivating her to write these words? Why didn’t she just ignore me and move on, or politely disengaged? What made her feel compelled to reframe our interactions and what made her feel justified in telling me how I should feel and in stitching together a tapestry of insults and put-downs hung onto a skeleton of disarming politeness?

What is it she wants from me to validate her? I believe she wants the sanction of the victim. She wishes to position herself as the prize, as the chooser, and the empowered woman who can do everything she wants like an urban goddess. Knowing that I have added 25+ hotter girls to my Facebook since I met her she wishes to recover the special snowflake position so she can then dismiss me. She wishes to get under my skin, hurt my self-esteem and hopefully trigger a long impassioned response in which I defend myself against her charges and perhaps prostrate myself in rebuilding rapport. She certainly wants a response. So I reply:

ok. Thanks for the note.

Full disclosure: As I typed my response I was sitting in a nightclub with my date, surrounded by five beautiful women. I had just closed ten girls that afternoon (post and video coming soon) and four the night before (likewise).

Daygame Motivational

Here’s a little weekend present for those of you just getting into the idea of approaching girls during the day time. The most important thing to remember is this: Day game is fun – for both you and the girl. Knock ‘em out.

Some Product Reviews

Months ago I envisioned this blog would be papered with product reviews and all my insights gleaned from them. It never really happened because I tend to pull useful ideas from many sources and then roll them all up together into a system I’ve made my own. Thus I tend towards think pieces and synthesis when not just doing the usual field reports. To correct this omission, here’s a quick rundown of the products I’ve used in the twelve months since I first started reading. Purely personal, so if I trash something that has worked well for you don’t be sore. In no particular order

Good (i.e. useful knowledge to retain and integrate)
Undercover Sex Signals (Leila Lowdnes): A mainstream US dating coach goes through a series of 40 or so posed photographs of women explaining how to recognise each signal as an IOI. Her principle is to identify the women that show a subtle interest in you and then sarge them. Theoretically sound signals and I do watch for them.

Blueprint Decoded / Jeffy Show (RSD): While I’m wary of the cult-like RSD organisation and their insane price structure, I still think they have the very best DVD material out there. More than anything else this has driven me away from the trickster-gamer towards the natural-player.

Man Transformation (David DeAngelo): This dude really needs to learn concision because this series could be shrunk to a quarter of the size without losing an ounce of insight, but it’s still very good stuff. My approach is all about making the Beta2Alpha transition and this series is loaded with inner game concepts and direct activities that facilitate it.

How to become an Alpha Male (John Alexander): As a literary piece its raw and disorganised but it gets a lot of clear direct advice into a single volume. It doesn’t fully explore the alpha concepts like DD or Roissy, nor does it nail down the theoretical underpinnings that orient you, but as a first foray into B2A it does the job nicely.

Alpha Immersion (Carlos Xuma): I have no idea about the guy’s personal credibility, having never seen in-field footage. He somehow manages to be alpha and herb at the same time. The series is good for patiently and systematically treading over the nature of alphaness without all the disconnected rambling and too-clever-by-half aphorisms of DD.

Carpe Diem (Bad Boy): I haven’t finished this but I like it a lot. The dude is a hardcore alpha in a loser’s body and shows just how it’s the former that overshadows the latter. It’s also the most visually interesting lecture series because of the varied locations for his piece-de-camera.

How to Speed Read People: Sometimes you read things and find yourself nodding your head in agreement, other times your bullshit detector is flashing. This book did the former. Once I’d done the exercises to find out my personality type (INTJ per their jargon) I read the personality description and thought “that really is me”. I then did the “cold read” test of reading some descriptions of other types and thought “that isn’t me”. So I’m convinced. Some direct practical advice too. I really ought to go back to this book and integrate it.

Atlas Shrugged (Ayn Rand): What’s this doing here? If Tyler can get away with banging on about Tolle, then I can get away with banging on about a far far superior book that constructs a shining model of the perfect human mind (John Galt). This book is long, turgid and crawls along at a glacial pace but it’s never dull and the periodic character rants are exquisite.

Make Women Hot (Ross Jeffries): Eye-opening stuff to see Ross sitting on his stool talking in a relaxed manner, barely kinoing, and the girl is going red, squirming, and breaking out into a hot flush. I’ve done this stuff in-field (both direct application of his routines and my own inspired by this DVD) and it definitely works. It’s pure verbal escalation. It won’t work unless you’re already doing some decent attraction work.

Deeper Than Game (Assanova): This was only on sale for about a month and is gone now. Assanova is funny like that. When I loaned it to Jambone he said “this is the book I tried to write”. It’s a slim concise merging of natural with mechanical game carried off with an anti-game flair. Not much “do this, then do that” but gives a good frame and principles.

Bad (or more correctly, of limited use but perhaps worth a read)
The Game (Neil Strauss): Not actually a bad book and was great to introduce me to the various ideas of game but it’s just a shameless self-promotion exercise and the high points of elite game are entirely unremarkable – number close a Playboy model and get nowhere later? I’ve done that (and Burto actually fucked one), number close an HB10 in a club that ultimately goes nowhere? Done that. Live with a drugged up attention-whoring cougar slut? Wouldn’t stoop so low. The methods are all outer game and Strauss seems to finish the book as the same beta mangina he started – just more successful with club skanks. Still worth a read.

The Lay Guide (Tony Clink): A pivotal book for my own progression because it was the first Game material I saw and thus the “gateway drug” to where I am now. It does give a broad overview of the community as it was in 2005 and there’s plenty to work with. But theoretically it’s all over the place and it’s mostly shamelessly ripped off the work of others. Definitely worth a read at the fiver or so it’ll cost you.

The Power of Now (Excart Tolle): What a fucked up warped crazy loopster. I actually enjoyed the book so far but it’s a slog with all the new age mystic nonsense. Cut through that and there’s some penetrating insights on how to be at peace with yourself, but fucking hell pal – lay off the crack pipe.

Paul Janka: Haven’t finished it so the jury is still out. However his daygame ebook is basically a logistics manual masquerading as pick up advice. His “game” seems to be talk to lots of girls, ask for numbers, call numbers, meet girls, fuck girls. With a massive drop-out rate at each step and no control exercised over the process. The only game here is a numbers game. There’s no attraction, comfort or seduction going on. She’s either into you or she’s not – in which case what is there to actually learn?

Hypnotica: Not yet sure about this dvd set. He looks uncomfortable speaking, talks too fast, and qualifies too much. It’s easy to assume whatever success he’s having is more due to his buff look and stripclub ownership than any actual game. I’ll give it more time – it’s certainly got a good USP.

Body Language (David DeAngelo): Far too long-winded. It’s an endurance test to get to the value within. If you know nothing about body language, give it a go. Not bad per se, just your typical DD padding.

Global PUA Summit 2007 (various): I haven’t watched all of this but I really liked the long haired Asian dude who deconstructed daygame. It’s as good a daygame talk as I’ve ever seen. Thundercat was meh, trying to reframe AA out of existence and only getting halfway there. Johnny Soporno was extremely interesting but lacking credibility – I just don’t buy it. A couple of the other guys had little to offer. A mixed bag.

Sexualised Daygame (Sinn): I really enjoyed this and took a lot from it but I am as yet unconvinced it works. Let me define “works”. Sinn basically says you have to do hundreds of high-risk sexualised approaches to get a handful of lays, and without any quality benchmark. That’s just too much work for too little reward, a glorified numbers game. I learn game because I want to get the girl I want, not just whatever girl will have me. I refuse to fuck ugly girls, no matter how easy. In this sense Sinn’s method doesn’t work by definition. However, I think lots of his concepts and attitude can be extracted, refined and used to turbo-charge a normal daygame set. That’s what I’ll experiment with.

Ugly (just totally worthless)
How to Pull Women (Ed West): Some hack writer for Nuts magazine (an AFC weekly supplication magazine) got the assignment to teach fat loser “new lads” how to score tottie. He fails miserably. I accidently bought this book twice. Ouch. Totally worthless.

Get the Girl (Mehow): This is the epitome of worthless overpriced overhyped bullshit from a guy with no game whatsoever. If a teenage virgin started his own pickup company he would look like Mehow and release this snake oil. Basically it’s Mystery Method in new clothes but having lost all of the insight. The infield “successes” Mehow deconstructs are totally non-sexual go-nowhere sets with low quality girls. Why anyone would want to model the dorky, uncalibrated, excruciatingly boring and fake, camp, faggy Mehow is completely beyond me

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