First date with the new black chick

March 30, 2010

This was a spur of the moment street pickup and then after some Facebook teasing I got her out to an entourage night – though due to a mix up she couldn’t get in. As a general rule I don’t apologise to women because being the bloodsucking harpies that they are, the typical woman will treat your first apology as an open sore to be picked and scraped until it’s a large festering wound. My calibration told me otherwise in this case – I had, after all, persuaded her to get all dressed up, to bring a friend, and then she’d been standing outside in the cold unable to get into the club. So I apologised on FB chat but made sure not to beg forgiveness. My reframe went like this:

Krauser: I’m so sorry. I just checked my messages and realised you’d called on Thursday
HB Black: [immediate response]. Yes. We were really cold.
Krauser: I couldn’t get any reception downstairs. If I’d known you were there I would’ve come out to get you.
HB Black: It was awful. We talked to the doormen but they didn’t have a Krauser on the guest list.
Krauser: Yeah, we were there on [model girl]’s list.
HB Black: I didn’t know that.
Krauser: Look, I feel like I’ve been a prize arsehole. I’m thinking of how to make it up to you.
HB Black: I am thinking.
Krauser: OK, I’ve got a plan. I’ll take you out for milkshake. I know the best milkshake bar in London. Proper stuff from ice cream and served in big metal flasks. It’s like warping back to the 1950s.
HB Black: Sounds nice 🙂

So we meet outside a bar in Oxford Circus and I immediately bounce her to the milkshake place, walking arm in arm to begin the kino. She’s done herself up very nice in an understate non-slutty manner. We sit across the table in a booth.

Deceptively big funbags

The conversation goes well and she’s actively contributing to it and asking me lots of questions so I’m thinking she’s screening hard for a potential LTR. I have decided to put on a relaxed nice-guy alpha pose (rather than, say, douchebag game) because she seems quite educated and most of what she says has the subtext of “I’m not a ghetto whore”. I heard educated black chicks have a real chip on their shoulder about their slutty sistas but it’s the first time I’ve seen it.

I bounce her to my favourite members bar and we have soft leather sofa chairs in the upstairs lounge. It’s quite busy so we can’t choose seats – I’d have gone for side by side on the sofa – so kino would be awkward. To compensate for lack of touching I work more on strong eye contact, soft slow voice tone and an alpha slouch. She comments favourably several times on how relaxed (and relaxing) I am. She’s qualifying to me a lot but subconsciously. It’s clear that in her forebrain she thinks she’s controlling the frame but I can see the IOIs and her emotional engagement beginning.

My calibration tells me this is a slow burner. She’s so determined not to look like a ghetto whore that I think fast escalation would provoke defensive reactions. I lean more towards the intellectual side that usual and I rely on NLP routines to build some heat. It’s going well and I progress to handholding towards the end when I lead her around the venue and then walk her out. She’s meeting friends later (after midnight) so I get her to wait with me for my late night bus. I want to pull her in as we wait but it’s not quite there and forcing it feels wrong. Already the look in her eyes is the classic forebrain/hindbrain conflict where her rationalisation hamster is saying “slow down” but the pussy tingle is saying “let’s get it on!”

I continue on the next day (Sunday) with texts

Krauser [12:29pm]: Mornin’. I hope you found your friends ok
HB Black [3:00pm]: Hi Krauser, I did find my friends thanks, we had a good night. Hope your enjoying to sunshine.
Krauser [Monday 8:45pm]: I’m keen on Japanese next. Can you handle sashimi and agedashidofu?
HB Black [9:51pm]: Imm… is this your way of asking me out on a real date Krauser?
Krauser [10:16pm]: So what’s the technical term for Saturday?
HB Black [10:39pm]: Well for me Krauser it was very different to what I call a date. I guess I saw Saturday as two people meeting properly getting equated on friend level. Hand holding happened at the end, but its not something I normally agree to do! And your views r?
Krauser [10:44pm]: Then let’s get acquainted more on a date. How is Wednesday for you?
HB Black [11:14pm]: I tell you what Krauser lets get acquainted over a drink as friends and I will tell you if you have made it to the next round (date).
Krauser [11:21pm] I do drinks. I don’t do auditions.
HB Black [11:38pm]: Darling, you’ve already auditioned last week. And this week is your second audition, I’ll let u know if u get the part lol Wednesday will be fine. What time? 🙂
Krauser [Tuesday 10:15am]: I reckon 8pm. Central London. Good for you?
HB Black [4:54pm]: 8pm sounds good. How about outside [venue]?
Krauser [7:11pm]. Ok

Fuck me that was hard work. See how she’s trying to control the frame with her as the prize and me presenting myself for her approval. Fuck that. My instinctive reply to her 11:14pm text was “Nah, I don’t do auditions” so I typed that in but left it for five minutes while I had a piss and then decided she needed more velvet over the steel. As a general rule I’d recommend this text game strategy:

Always type your instinctive reply to a text message immediately, but don’t send it. Allow you’re rational mind to mull over that instinct. The message you do send will be 80% instinctive and 20% refined by strategic thinking.

As you become alpha, your instincts are usually to be trusted. They’ve kept millions of generations of your genese alive after all. An instinctive text is a pure authentic response and usually vibrates with the bottled power of your character. In contrast, I long thought-out text is stale and usually “gamey”. My strategy straddles both.

The second date approaches. I’m standing outside Angus Steak in Leicester Square and she texts to say she’ll be ten minutes late so I open a young French girl who is reading a book next to me. Very cute. I tease a bit and get her Facebook, then I see my date approaching so I wait till she sees us then say goodbye to Frenchie. We go to a nearby pub.

The vibe this time is really playful. I’m teasing and negging the shit out fo her and before long the educated pretense drops and she’s giving it the head roll, finger circle and “whateva” ghetto talk – and hating that I can rile her up into doing it. It’s lots of fun. We have a few drinks, then it’s done. I’ll probably see her again.


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  2. Agreed about the texting. Rule 2 is to not play by their game in terms of when to respond. A girl I’m texting right now takes 4-5 hours to respond to every message. Normally I’d take that as an indicator of disinterest, except she’s trying to set up a date. Anyway this really fucks me off so sometimes I’ve been switching up the delays, texting straight back one time then waiting a day to reply with another.

    But you always need to leave the sms on ice for a bit and come back with a fresh pair of eyes to see if it’s ok.

  3. Her reframing is sick. Typical western woman deluded sense of self worth shit. Well done for resisting the impulsive ‘fuck off’ reply, I couldn’t have stopped myself.
    Just store away that little memory and in a months time fuck her up the arse and dump her. Then see who’s frame is strongest.

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  5. I agree with Dan. I have little tolerance for BS. Pump n dump. Looks like it might be too much work for a 7 at the most though.

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  7. Black women, no offense, esp if they bring their “hood talk” are just terrible and a waste of time.

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