I know I’m labouring the point but it’s important to repeatedly stress the benefits of leaping from the K-selection ladder to the R-selection stratosphere. They are two different worlds with completely different rules. There are a couple of good bloggers who live the international man of mystery lifestyle. I like what they are doing. They’ve unplugged and are giving detailed advice on how to follow in their footsteps. Sometimes their material is downright inspirational.
But I think it confused r/K somewhat. What they recommend is different to what I do. So allow me to split some hairs and explain the difference*
I’ve spent one month in a pleasant FSU city, all of it in the Old Town. That’s a small place where you constantly run into the same people over and over. I’m constantly bumping into girls I know while another girl is on my arm. Let me list them chronologically**:
- Jelena is a long-term rotation girl who I bang every time I visit, since mid-2012. She doesn’t have a boyfriend and is focused on her new career, so I’m the sex guy she comes to for a rogering that won’t otherwise upset her life pattern. First night I arrived in town she came round and I took her anal virginity. A week later I fingered her in a cafe.
- Anya is a Russian I closed in Estonia last November. She flew down the first weekend of my trip for a three day visit. She’s back home now, pestering me for the next trip.
- Jovanna is a folk singer I closed December 2012 and has been something of a primadonna since. On a whim I messaged her when I arrived and she was in town so we had coffee and made out. A week later she’s back in town so we fuck. I’m now her sex guy when she’s in town.
- Milicia is a young student who I opened in my first week. She didn’t reply to my feeler text until I’m walking through a park with Anya and bump into her sitting on a bench with her boyfriend. Now she messages me, we have a date a couple of days later, and a booty call one day later. She’s now a fuck buddy.
- Bojana is a young girl I opened last year on a residential with Tom. Occasional FB chat because she likes me but has a boyfriend of four years. I get her on a date and bang her within an hour. She’s since bumped into me when I’m with Natalija and Vedrana. She doesn’t care, still wants to see me.
- Dragana is a thirty-year old girl who has barely had sex. I open her this trip, escalate hard on the date, and booty call her next date for the close. I told her I’m a player and she’s still pestering me for casual sex.
- Natalija is a 19 year old fashion model with a long-distance boyfriend she met when she was 16 and her only prior sexual partner. I banged her on the second date and now she’s a fuck buddy. Last time I fucked her she said “you should give my boyfriend sex lessons”
- Radmila is a 26 year old girl who dated me three days before going on a one-month holiday with her boyfriend. She said she’d had sex a couple of days before our date but I still took her home that night. She’s asking if I’ll still be here when she gets back.
- Vedrana is a 22 year old virgin I met on the same 2013 residential with Tom. She was scared but let me take her virginity last week. Before that happened, she bumped into me while I was with Anya.
- Marija is an 18 year old who I had on my bed sucking my cock on the second date. Three hours before the booty call sex date she messaged me “I can’t see you for a while, my boyfriend found out”. We are still messaging, waiting for it to blow over.
I have a tendency to preen on this blog but note some key points.
- Four of these girls had boyfriends and step out on them to fuck me. A fifth is highly likely. They all talk like it’s matter-of-fact and no big deal.
- Three of these girls “caught” me with other girls and didn’t complain. Twice it was before the sex and they came to me anyway. One of those was a virgin.
- All of these girls are using me as their “good sex guy” and don’t make any demands on my time other than the sex.
- I’ve been here one month. I haven’t been clubbing, I don’t have any local friends or “connects”.
This is completely different to the K-selected idea of an MLTR. I don’t have to tell lies to any of them. I make it clear I’m a player and then don’t rub their noses in the details. There are no dinner dates, walks around the park and except for Anya I never hold their hands in public. I’m not installing these girls into apartments like mistresses, buying them iPads, or establishing a position in their social circles. I’ve not met a single friend or family member of any of them. The entire relationship is a one-on-one discreet secret. We share affection and connection – we have true moments of the Love Bubble, it’s not “empty sex” – but it’s not a boyfriend/girlfriend thing.
It’s okay to have K-selected MLTRS, it’s just that for my personality type it’s such a……. ball ache. If you can communicate from the very first seconds of the street stop that you’re the Lover then that’s the track you’ll stay on the whole time. Girls have a severe disconnect between Lovers and Providers. Don’t mix the signals. Project R-selection and then you can cut through all of the bullshit that surrounds a K-selection relationship.
Just imagine…. no more time dicking around learning the local language, no social circle obligations taking you away from CounterStrike, no stupid salsa nights, and no looking over your shoulder in case one girl busts you on a date with another.
So decide what you want. If you want a long-term boyfriend-girlfriend / sponsor-moll / daddy-girl relationship then go the K-route and do not feel ashamed of it. That route give a certain experience that can be very fullfilling, especially if you’re a man who prioritises affection needs. If the lifestyle I just outlined is more your thing then you must go the r-selection route.
To learn how to meet girls on the r-selection path, consider my textbook Daygame Mastery
* and if I’ve misconstrued your message, feel free to correct me in the comments.
** names changed, obviously.