Failure stories #4 – The Saudi virgin

November 19, 2013

I’m walking down Oxford Street near Selfridges in the summer of 2012. My approaching has already started to wind down after gorging myself in a month’s tour of Yugoslavia. I’m relying on autopilot to push me along but it’s still pleasant. I see a tall African girl dressed elegantly with a colourful headscarf.

Hmmmm. I believe in going after Unicorns. This means girls who are completely outside of my normal catchment demographic but of such rare and unusual beauty that I really ought to give it a go on general principle. I don’t have any expectations of how they’ll react or how well I can get them. Just push the comfort zone and chase the beauty.

Drop a point

Drop a point

So I open this Muslim telling her I love her stylish fashion. Probably I compare her to a giraffe. I forget. She loves it. Her accent is posh and measured, her dememour very classy…. she’s just adorable. Sharp intelligent eyes, a free easy smile. Yummy. My humour is free-flowing and Im’ feeling good:

Me: I’m Nick

Her: I’m Afaf

Me: Haha… [laughing]

Her: What? Why are you laughing?

Me: That’s not a name. That’s the noise dogs make. Afafafafaf

Later when telling her friends they love it and make dog jokes when she tells them of dates. I keep a general “woof woof” theme of callback humour going throughout the dating. So I take the number and get her out a week later. I thoroughly stumped as to how to proceed. She’s a proper five-prayers-a-day Muslim virgin of Somali background but grew up in Saudi Arabia. Culturally we are from different planets. I’m in my head about it.

Day 2 is a walk around a small park near Russell Square, sitting on a bench and later a coffee in Costa. I’m too freaked out to escalate, the headscarf and virginity giving me a mental block. We finish in a pub but she doesn’t drink alcohol and I overtly tell her I have no idea how to proceed. She’s nice about it but I’m expecting to LJBF myself through incompetence. I’m puzzled why I don’t feel the usual drive to just run the escalation model and push towards sex.

Day 3 is a nearby cinema to watch Judge Dredd. I hold her hand like a nervous teenager and then as we leave the darkened screen I kiss close her. Great, she takes it. She leans up against me in the bus stop and I send her home. From now on things are more like a normal girl but she’s got this massive virginity block.

Tepid Escalation

Tepid Escalation

We go to parks, eat in restaurants, have coffee. She comes round my house several times to watch movies and sit in my bedroom. It’s the closest thing I’ve had to regular dating all year. I even take her to a friend’s birthday party in Notting Hill. I’ve got a girlfriend. I like this. Autumn has come and I really don’t feel like generating new leads through the street grind. I want to hibernate and just close off my remaining leads which at this point are:

One of the Russians drift away after a solid Day 3 kiss close while both Croats fall off the radar. It’s a shame because all are solid 8s but what can you do? I’m just happy to knock over four of seven. Autumn passes into winter and I’ve now been dating my Saudi once a week for about two months.

Every escalation is painfully slow. First time I kiss her it’s soft. Second time there’s tongues and a bit of groping. First time I get her home she cuddles up to me on the sofa but won’t come to my bedroom. First time in the bedroom I get her tits out but no touching up downstairs. Later I finger her to orgasm through her jeans. Later again she wanks me off. Later again I get her face exploring around my dick but she won’t put it in her mouth.

Weirdly, I’m not too upset about the slothlike pace of escalation. I like her company. She tells me I’m the first man to ever take her beyond kissing. Yes, at age 26 she has never had a man mash her tits, touch her pussy or wrap her long fingers around his cock. I feel like Captain Kirk exploring a new planet. It doesn’t feel like failure. It’s nice having her adore me.

Then things go suddenly wrong. I’m at the next push for escalation in my bedroom unbuttoning her jeans. She’s so hot and horny I very nearly get her jeans off. She’s on the edge of the cliff, one tiny step from going all the way over the edge into full sex. We both sense it. She shuts down. I have to back off. At the bus stop I give her a nice kiss before she waves goodbye and I shrug my shoulders – only a matter of time now.

She doesn’t reply to any more texts. Complete radio silence. Unadds me from skype. She’s gone without explanation or goodbye. A year later I’m out with Jabba in Selfridges cafe when she walks past with a friend. I see her, she sees me, she knows I know she knows I’m there. She completely blanks me.

I’ve since experienced similar behaviour from other chaste Africans. Their body pushes them to hot horny sex but their mind resists. Eventually they reach a moment where they know one more step will put them over the edge. They cool off back home and realise “if I see him again I’ll end up fucking him”. So they cut contact. They can’t trust themselves not to get roped back in and deflowered. It sucks for me. If I’d figured out the solution to this puzzle I’d have had virgin flags fro Saudi Arabia, Ghana and Equitorial Guinea. Harumph!


  1. So close, K. Do you ever try extreme role play with such girls? Example:

    K: Hey Saudi Babe, we’re married now (*hand her a fresh coconut*). Here’s a symbol of my temporary affection. Time to consumate!

    Saudi Babe: !!!

    K: Don’t resist. I’m your loving, chode husband.

    Who knows, though. She could have gone crazy and removed your member afterwards, mate. Don’t you worry about such things?

  2. Great story. I like these recent posts. I’m going through a terrible time after breaking up with my gf. I’ve been gaming other girls but it’s just a slog. My inner game is shot and I’m wondering “is it me???” Then these posts are reassuring in some sense that this is not a permanent state but something that needs to be managed.

    I like the theme here. I was seeing a tall, slim very hot girl last year. We hung out, went to shows, I was making out with her, she was all into it.

    She invited herself to my place and I fingered her to orgasm and she wanked me.

    After that I never heard from her again. She stopped replying to texts.

    A short time later I see her on the street with a total local Hong Kong herb.

    Then on FB i notice she recently married Herb. But her posts are all about getting drunk and apart from wedding photos he’s not really mentioned in any posts.

    So with me, she was kind of up for exploring. With this guy it’s total beta provider. The photos of the two of them have him leaning in and wrapping his arm around her like you see kids doing with Disney characters.

    There is a weird thing with some girls that they suddenly just shut down and then that’s it.

    • SOMETHING really similar happened to me this year, I met this this girl trough facebook, a friend of a friend, she opened me first, slim, dark ballerina girl. We chatted for a little bit, and I asked her out for some drinks, it went pretty well, we had a beer, we started making out, we went to the beach at 2 am (don’t ask), she gave me a blowjob while driving, I was fingering her trough the ride and I ended sleeping with her at her house, she couldn’t believe it. Even days later she kept asking me “Who are you?” like she couldn’t believe how fast it went. We dated for 4 months, I was having a great time and so did she, awesome sex, she chatted with me whenever she had time, we had great chemistry, and then one day while we were together, she told me I was a really important part of her life, I didnt know what to say, at the time, but it didn’t matter she really liked me. After that, radio silence, she was ignoring me, she had a lot of work as I did, but even before, with full schedules we had time to meet even at 3 or 4 am, that wasn’t the issue. I tried to chat with her, but she always had “something” to do.

      Fast forward to now, 7 months later. I find out trough a friend that she is 7 months pregnant, obviously I entered panic mode. I really freaked out, i cried, yelled, everything, I was really feeling like shit, tried to contact her, but didn’t have her phone anymore, so I sent her a message trough FB, she accepted my friend request but didnt give me an answer. I got her phone number from a close friend of ours, that knew she was pregnant but didnt knew we dated, so he was kinda surprised too. Well, I phoned her the next day, kinda awkward conversation, and told me the kid is not my son (Don’t worry, is not going to be a billy jean joke). Well, to make the story short, she told me several times before that she had a weird womb illness, that could develop to cancer if not treated right, and the doctors told her is now or never, have kids or you won’t have the chance later. So she went back to her ex-bf, the one she dated for 7 years, the one she told me she didn’t feel attracted to him anymore, the one she told me “I hope he finds someone else that could love him back, and give him a family, cause I can’t”, the one she told me it was more like a brotherly relationship. She went back to him to have a baby, for him to provide to. That’s what he wanted, he even proposed to her while we were dating, and she said no.

      So in the end she chose the provider, to give her a baby. Not because she loved him like a man, but more like, I don’t have a lot of options, i will choose the man that I know would say yes. Of course she didn’t include me in her plans, because I never gave the idea that I wanted to be a provider. But feels weird, that I was her last adventure before settling down, I really liked her, and I support her decision, but still feels weird.

  3. Good advice to push yourself to approach girls past your normal demo. Here in California it’s a must since hot, east Europeans are like unicorns and Asian and Indian girls are more plentiful, it’s starting to get old though.

    Do you have girls that you date regularly in London? I’m sure the girls you meet and visit on your trips are higher quality, but it’s always nice to have something close to home on a regular basis. On a related note I wonder if you go into long form dating in your book. I’d be interested to hear how you approach dating multiple women and how you frame the relationships to them.

  4. virgin-till-marriage girls are often ok anal

    • I think that’s only true if it’s a long term thing. But yeah heard plenty of stories from living in Asia for nearly two decades that suggest the butthole is used before marriage to preserve virginity.

  5. With real prudes, like virgins, I would think pushing hard for sex until they either give in or stop contact is the best way to go, or else you get caught up in this long chase and investment builds on your part before the inevitable. Better to find out sooner than later if she puts out than waiting, unless you don’t mind waiting.

  6. i’m “dating” a virgin girl now. I went for the lay about a week ago and things were going really well–had her shirt off, had her straddling me, then I went for the jeans and she wouldn’t go for it. Tried some more with trying to put her hand on my dick but it was like trying to get a cat to take a bath and i didn’t want to rape the poor girl. SO here I am a week later baffled as to whether or not to go hard for the sex again. I figure if I go hard this time and she leaves at least I can say we simply weren’t compatible, obviously.

    • I was dating a girl in Poland for a while who’d only had sex with her one, long-term boyfriend. Two or three times I got her down to her panties, but it was a hard stop for anything beyond that. I think she was trying to entice me to commit to her, since I told her previously I wasn’t looking for a monogamous relationship. The last time we saw each other she’s the one that jumped on me, but once I got to the roadblock where I knew she definitely wouldn’t go further, I gave up and ended up telling her we shouldn’t see each other any more.

      With virgins or girls like these you might eventually make it happen, but I believe it was Rollo Tomassi that said that when a girl makes you wait for sex, it’s never worth it. You have to be more patient with some eastern European and Russian girls, but endless dates are counterproductive, even if you think she’s special. If you’re not trying to make her your girlfriend it’s also not worth her getting attached and going through emotional pain afterwards.

  7. Question: When you reached out afterwards and encountered radio silence and found she deleted you from Skype, did you ever ask “What’s wrong?” or “Why’d you delete me?”

  8. This is one of the best things about this blog

    Not just that it’s a failure story but that you approach girls of all races and religions when other guys would take one look and say it’s not going to happen

    Can’t imagine trying to fuck a abstinent hijabi Muslim girl, it just seems pointless and impossible

    But you came close as fuck and iirc pulled it off before

    Shit like that that makes this my favourite blog

    • Love how everyone’s giving Krauser “advice” and missing the point of him sharing these failure stories.

      It’s not so you paper alphas can DHV with your words of wisdom.

      It’s to show that even the best of the best “fail” which is what makes them great. Feedback not failure. Part of Game is high risk, high reward. By going for it Krauser showed how far he’s willing to push it.

  9. Krauser on Twitter fire

    Paul Krugman has plenty of Integrity: for his own Tribe

    He is willing to be intellectually dishonest because Alpha is doing “whatever it takes to Win”

    White Gentile Males need a little less “honest to a fault” and a little more “eyes on the prize” [Did a quick search on Krugman. Can’t find any evidence of alpha or sigma. Seems pure gamma. All gammas have an “in” and his is being a professor to try to pull students into his web. He’s also a malignant Ellsworth Toolly type frame controller which is also gamma. His second wife is plain and only 6 years younger than him but very post-wall. Couldn’t find photos of the first wife or any mistresses. An alpha with his fame would be killing it with co-eds and liberal fangirls. K.]

    • Yes he is Gamma.

      But he acts as his Tribe acts – to “win at all costs”

      No one fights their fire with fire

      And when the Alpha tribe doesn’t stop the Gamma tribe… guess what

      The Gamma Tribe WINS.

      The Gamma becomes Alpha

  10. ” I’ve got a girlfriend. I like this. Autumn has come and I really don’t feel like generating new leads through the street grind.”

    Some women still give a buzz, I think searching for that buzz is often the motivating factor.
    Contrary to most of the manosphere philosophy they ain’t all the same.
    As always thanks for posting.

  11. Nah, when you’re about to take off her jeans, you say, “I just can’t do this.” She’ll then become the aggressor and eventually go for your Johnson. Aloofness, always aloofness. [Sure, pal. Sure. K.]

  12. You should be happy that you did not end up adding a virgin flag to your flag bucket. It would be the first and last sex for her and probably the last one for you if her parents were a bit too nosey. Saudi Arabia is the most conservative in Islamic world. I am sure you did not wanted the girl to get stoned and smashed down to the hot sand in Saudi Arabia. I have been there and I almost know every little detail about these girls.

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