As JJ, Toe and I sip whiskey and smoke cigars in the Hemingway Suite at Chateau RSG, the discussion moves away from political philosophy and back to girls. It’s our favourite subject. JJ reclines on a green leather chestefield sofa, puffs out a stream of smoke and opines:
“The problem with bar game is that high value people don’t go to bars”
We nod. For a moment the light jazz sounds from the gramophone fill the silence. Toe leans over to relight his cigar. All three of us are excavating memories of our highest-value girls to determine if they liked bars and clubs. Surprise surprise, they didn’t. Maybe JJ is onto something here.
“RCM hated clubs. She’d only go when she was paid. Usually she liked to just cook for a dinner party with friends, or read a book” I add. “Painter isn’t a bar rat either.”
“I met Playboy Model in Jewel bar, though” says Toe. “She was the hottest I’ve fucked.”
JJ meets the counter example with “Yeah, she was hot but she was a slapper. Fake tits, relentless gamesplayer, and you said yourself she wasn’t even a good lay. She was counterfeit – looked like a million pounds but not worth a penny.”
I think of the girl I’ve been dating the past two weeks. She’s a famous actress in her home country, well-educated, far richer than I am, and an all-round delightful person. When I asked her how she likes to spend weekends she tells me she goes to restaurants with friends or walks in the park. I think JJ is right – bars and clubs are barren wastelands if your goal is quality women.
“Bar game is just weird. Why try to pick up girls in an environment designed to take two points off a man’s attractiveness and give them to women?” comments Toe.
“It’s an accident of history. In modern Western society bars are the societally-approved places to meet girls. And then Mystery happened to like bars so his method was all about night game” says I. I know JJ isn’t going to accept a mischaracterisation of his beloved Mystery Method.
“No no no. Mystery just said bars are a good place to practice because of all the sets. His method isn’t specific to bar game – it’s universal”
We agree, but bootcamps got run in bars and everyone practiced in bars so very quickly people forget the universality of Game and just stay in bars. Once the blinkers are on they tend to stay on.
“Bars also help the men, in their own weird way” I offer. “Just as most women are low value, so are most men. Bars inhibit most avenues of displaying value. They pretty much force you to focus on good looks, grooming and basic body language. They force you to act like a hyperactive bell-end to compete against the various distractions. It’s just not conducive to showing real wide-ranging value. So low value guys can better pretend they are high value.”
The conversation moves on to men. What is a high value man, and how do they differ from the mass of society. JJ interjects again.
“We’re not trying to get good at picking up women. We’re trying to be better men.”
I think of the books I’ve read, the countries I’ve visited, the career I built, the expert systems I learned. Yes, most of my value to a girl is from the type of man I am rather than the Game I spout.
“That’s why most pick up guys don’t bang desirable girls. It’s one thing to sweep up dizzy club tarts but another thing entirely to date, and secure the love and affection, of a top class woman.”
“I’d rather have a ten minute conversation with a ten than bang a seven” says JJ. He’s racked up over 150 lays so he’s speaking from a position of strength. “It’s about the romantic radar.”
“True. I’m not much fussed about the sex. I never got into game for more sex with mediocre birds” says I. “The most satisfying part of this month wasn’t banging that Romanian seven. It was with the actress, when I realised I was on her romantic radar. She’s a ten who can pick and choose who she spends time with and she wanted to come out on dates with me. She is extremely high value and she has decided I have the value to be in her life, romantically. That’s more satisfying, and says more about how I’ve lived my life, than SDLing some lost tourist off Oxford Street.”
October 15, 2011 at 1:51 pm
F*** bars, nightclubs and any other venue that requires you to drink alcohol and stay up past midnight, acting like a hyperactive clown or james bond caricature in order to attract (and heres the hard part) hold the attraction of some dirty ADD bar skank. The most wonderful and together woman I know, my mum, has never set foot in a bar after 8 PM in her life.
Lets do a simple test here of how much you like night game. You’re rolling solo tonight and I tell you that tonight in your city, its men’s night at all the bars and clubs in the city, all the women are at home, would you go, even though its friday/saturday?
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October 16, 2011 at 12:00 am
“The most satisfying part of this month wasn’t banging that Romanian seven. It was with the actress, when I realised I was on her romantic radar. She’s a ten who can pick and choose who she spends time with and she wanted to come out on dates with me. She is extremely high value and she has decided I have the value to be in her life, romantically. That’s more satisfying, and says more about how I’ve lived my life, than SDLing some lost tourist off Oxford Street.”
Thats utterly lame to me. In my opinion, the greatest men are greater than the greatest women. This guy is letting himself be valued by women. In the context of sex there might be some objective spectrum of value which states you are of lower value than her, but thats just sex. There is more to life than sex. There is more to objective value than sexual market place value.
[If you read the blog, you’d answer your own questions. For example: this post about value of men and women. K.]
October 17, 2011 at 1:14 am
You’ve opened a can of something with this post Kraus.
I never actually looked at the bar scene this way before.
But I can’t recall ever meeting a quality chicc from the bar.
October 17, 2011 at 8:29 am
The entire environment in a bar is set up for the bar owner to make lots of money, i.e. for you to buy lots of drinks. It is for this reason that bars are so loud. when it’s loud, you can’t carry on a conversation. All the nuances, the subtleties of tone, of bodylanguage are lost. If you can’t talk what do you do? That’s right, you drink. I usually meet the birds for a day 2 in my neighborhood bar where you can actually seduce a woman with words and exhbit all aspects of your personality. I notice that we nurse the same drink for about an hour. Why because we are so engrossed in each other’s company. the alcohol adds to the conversation. In a bar, in that same hour, i usually guzzle a couple pints and a few shots. Why? there is nothing else to do but dance like a monkey. Fuck bars! they are not designed for you to get laid. They are designed for the propreiter to make money.
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June 29, 2014 at 7:50 pm
In my limited experience the same principle applies to the dating market as to business marketing: The “media” that you create for yourself potentially have a far greater return on investment than the ready-made media that you buy from a salesman. So, bars/clubs/internet dating sites are like the yellow pages, while day game is like dropping in on a business prospect, handing him your card and giving him your elevator talk. The cost of the ready-made media rises to just below whatever pain point would stop anyone from advertising there (due to every Tom, Dick and Harry using it), while the self-made media are a (scary) wilderness with much less competition for attention.