I bang my first 23yr old Yugoslav dancer

October 16, 2012
krauserpua

I’ve held off writing this report because most of the seduction has been covered in other posts, and because I have some regrets over getting involved with this girl. When I initially got into Game / PUA I had relatively undefined goals. Mixed in with my general desire to make up for lost time (having been in a relationship 9 years and a serial monogamist for most of my adult life) was a more existential desire to bring my love life under my locus o control. In early 2009 I felt powerless and at a loose end, thrust back onto the dating market without any skills to compete. Just go back to my very early posts to get a window into what a low ebb I was at. The Mighty Krauser of today is utterly assured around hot young women and pretty damn confident that a good portion of them will fancy, flirt and fuck him. The Lowly Krauser of 2009 would’ve been happy with 30-year old table scraps. The journey changes who you are and what you feel entitled to.

What I’m entitled to

If you were to roll up my goals and desires in 2009 you’d find a seething tangled toxic mess of desperation, neediness, bitterness and powerlust. Ok, I exaggerate but I had a negative frame and was easy pickings for the siren voices of the Dark Side. My first eye-opening realisation from summer 2009 was that I could start and hold conversations with precisely the pretty young girls that I fancied. That motivated me to keep plugging away through wind, sleet and snow. As summer 2010 arrived I was dating a sweet 22 year old Thai girl that Bhodi probably still fraps off to (if only he had my extensive sex video collection of her :) ). That relationship ran on 8 non-exclusive months while I also had a concurrent relationship with an even sweeter 19 year old French girl. Not only was I getting regular sex with girls who one year ago would’ve seemed forever off-limits, but I had a second eye-opening realisation… these girls were madly in love with me. I’d discovered my natural gift for soul collection deep conversion.

This was a sweet realisation because all my power-hungry fantasies came true. I guess I still had some abandonment issues from my divorce, these issues constantly reinforced in my forebrain by all the MRA websites I was reading at the time. I was seriously mistrustful of women both in the abstract and in person so I built a hard shell around myself as protection and also deliberately screened for young niave girls with limited sexual experience. The Thai had one previous sexual partner four years before meeting me, and the Frenchie one partner a few month earlier. So I developed my Soul Collection theories (and even a six hour presentation on how to do it) and set about a one year reign of terror amongst women’s hearts. It’s well over a year since I last ran amok with these powers and I’ve tried hard to manage girls’ expectations to prevent the kind of destructive heartbreaks I left in my wake. I firmly believe that every time a girl gives herself to a man with love, she gives a bit of her heart. Her capacity to feel niave blissful love for the next guy is permanently diminished by that extent.

It would appear my enduring character traits still steer me towards deep conversion, as my new Yugoslav girl showed.

While touring the former Yugoslavia in July I’d ended up walking down the main promenade with Robusto doing some half-arsed daygame. I pick my girl out a crowd despite her lack of makeup, tightly-pulled ponytail and loose-fitting gym clothes. I just know from her walk, figure and facial structure that she’s my kind of girl. It’s the genuine DNA-tug I discuss in my book. The stop hits well and we idate in a nearby cafe for an hour. She’s hit all my tickboxes:

  • introverted
  • intelligent
  • bookish
  • long legged
  • exotic look, especially high cheekbones and cat-like eyes
  • sexually inexperienced

There’s something bubbling under the surface, a hot spring of sexual energy waiting to be unleashed. We meet again the next night and I get my kiss close and some really good deep rapport. I use her reading of Fifty Shades Of Grey to handle my verbal escalation and sexual naturalisation. She comes to my room but won’t bang just yet. Next evening I finger her in the cafe to give her a Fifty moment. She begs me to stay but I have to go off to another date / lay. Our relationship continues on Skype.

I’m fully expecting to make this girl my new girlfriend. Not exclusively, she overtly confesses she doesn’t expect or require me to stay monogamous although she will, but I’m giving this girl real affection and building an emotional connection I expect to maintain. Quiet whispers from my subconscious are conflicting me but they are so weak as to be easily ignored. I want a girl in Belgrade so I’ll damn well have one. Things progress until we are talking openly about sex, she’s masturbating to text chat, and also she does a video striptease. Things are proceeding swimmingly. We agree for her to come visit me in London for a week (at my expense, she’s a student) so she begins the visa application. She’s thrilled. Not only has she totally fallen for me but she’s never travelled outside Serbia before and London is so so shiny to her. Unexpectedly, a ten day window opens up at work so on a whim I decide to go visit her. My doubts and conduct are discussed here so I’ll not repeat it.

I close her.

A real one, this time

The next evening when I tell her my feelings have died she is mortified. I can read in her eyes, almost see an image of her future crashing down about her. I feel awful but I’ve painted myself into a corner. Her previous (and only) sexual partner treated her like shit, apparently, and dumped her hard. She once told me if I did the same to her she’d break into little pieces so please don’t. I want to let her down gently but that’s like kicking her to death while wearing slippers. There’s only two ways to transition a girl out of a deep conversion:

  1. Patiently over several months allow her emotions and forebrain to disengage from you of their own accord. This requires reducing the frequency of contact (much easier when in different countries), refraining from gathering anymore heart strings in your grasp, reframing towards being a big brother rather than a boyfriend (so she still feels cared for and inside your reality but with diminished sexual energy), and logically clearing her to feel attraction for other men without feeling guilt. Doing this requires months of paying attention to the girl and even then it’s not a smooth ride for her. For a few girls I’ve been more than happy to do so because I retained not just a strong affection for them as people but also decent levels of sexual interest.
  2. Dump her hard and fast. The important cruel-to-be-kind point is that you crush all hope immediately so she has nothing to cling on to that will inhibit the grieving process. So tell her your feelings have died and they won’t rekindle, cut off contact (meaning don’t keep inquiring to her wellbeing or trying to be friends), and leave well alone. In these cases expect the girl to have a traumatic three-week purging process of tears and pleas for reconciliation. Maintain a stony-faced disengagement. Suddenly her feelings will turn and she’ll be over you.

I had zero interest in my Yugoslav girl after the first lay. I think my mind was made up halfway through, actually. I just felt a revulsion to her. It’s a really weird feeling because logically I could see she was still the very pretty girl I felt uninterrupted strong desire for the preceeding three months. Her behaviour was impeccable. There was literally nothing she could’ve done differently to keep me. It must be so frustrating for her. My mind made up I just had to sack up and tell her. Timing is important. Having sex with a girl triggers a cascade of hormonal and emotional responses in her that are not present prior to sex. Players are well aware of the sudden dramatic shift in power in a relationship after the initial lay. The effect is doubly pronounced once you’ve banged her three times as the oxytocin addicition takes over and her final barriers crumble. An old pre-game maxim of mine is bang a girl three times and you own her.

So if you’re gonna cut a girl off hard, do it as soon as you realise that’s the outcome. I did it after the first time. That doesn’t make it painless but considerably less so than if I’d strung her along the rest of the holiday. As a postscript, I’ve heard nothing back from her at all. I think she’s wise enough to know it wouldn’t help her recovery. I feel chastened. My own progress is less advanced than I’d come to believe if I’m lacking the self-awareness to know when I’m deep converting a girl I don’t wish to keep. Perhaps my hunger for power blinds me to the warnings of my core.

35 Comments

  1. I tend to cultivate women by making it clear from the outset that I am NOT looking for anything long term, or any type of commitment. Of course, women see this as a challenge and will convince themselves that they can change you, and you’ll be different for them. Just keep making that message clear, and you can tap them whenever you are in the mood, or the fates make is so that you’re horny and they are available. I’m a firm believer of “any port in a storm” so like to keep my “docking privileges” up to date…

  2. I guess you were in love with a fantasy of her not what she really was in the end.

  3. Your pangs of conscience are there for a reason; ignore them at your own risk.

    You rot your soul away a little bit more every time you treat another human soul like so much refuse. [You misread me. There was nothing wrong with my intentions or behaviour. The problem was my self knowledge of how I'd feel after banging her. K.]

    • Oh yeah,

      just send her also the video. I am pretty sure she will be happy seeing herself in Internet. [Seems like you've already started that WhiteKnight haterquest on your own. Might want to turn the spotlight on your own inner game. K.]

  4. LOL. Yes, Krauser still wants to go to heaven. He wants all of you to like him; he’s still a nice guy, you can trust him. He wouldn’t game you, you’re special.

    The gods don’t abide the lukewarm. Choose light or dark and collect the profits or losses. This middle of the road crap has to go. You may be able to fool women and your fanboys but you will never fool me. [solipsism. K.]

    Show some honesty. You screw up these women for life, and you know it fully.

    This is what you should write:

    “My intention was for her to give me her most precious gift that she will ever give. And after that, I will leave her and never see her again. If a man did this to my sister/mom/daughter, I’d be very upset. But its A-OK that I do it.”

  5. Haha, props on actually posting the video

  6. “And here’s a video of me fucking her.. heh!”

    Fuc*ng legend indeed! Well played son – in the inimitable words of Mr Rooney: The big man is back.

  7. I wonder if you are self aware enough to introspect on exactly what was it that turned you off so quickly about her.

    Obviously 3 months of anticipation and hunting culminate in bringing the quarry down and some of the excitement naturally wears off post bang, but i’ve rarely gone off a girl i’ve previously liked so quickly after first time sex – unless she did something really bad in the sack, like doing an impression of a dead star fish or trying to cut off my knob with her blunt finger nails.

  8. Krauser, you write above “The problem was my self knowledge of how I’d feel after banging her.” So you knew from the get-go that it would be just one bang and done, or did you only realize that after you’ve banged her? It doesn’t sound like you led her on to believe that you would be happily ever after. [I thought she'd be an LTR and I ignored the conflicting feelings I was getting, until they came out after banging her. I wasn't deliberately pumping and dumping. K.]

    Ryu, Krauser is not approval seeking, and I don’t think he’s a “nice guy,” whatever that is, nor does he want us to think that. I think you’re projecting. You wish that nice guys could do this. Obviously I wouldn’t want Krauser to do this to my sister, but that’s because she’s my sister. You are using feminist logic of projecting a special case onto all women.

  9. The guy produces video

    Must be a first for the Manosphere

    Fascinating about the low ebb in 2009. I can relate to the feelings of “desperation and powerlust” not too ago

    A girl gives away a piece of heart… but only to a rare Alpha, (if she even happens to meet one in her lifetime, many girls never do)

  10. Props for posting a video.

  11. Waaaaaay too dark side, Krauser.

    I am not a fucking White Knight, but you have just broke another girl and she’s going in slut direction… Well done – you are THE REAL PUA.

    Maybe try London’s sluts for a change – at least they are used to PUA.
    But those are not so naive & easy anymore, right?

    Technically you are superb, mentally like 6-years old kid, who got new toy – “damage not important as long as I have fun”
    I am also INTJ, we are very integrated psychologically – what the hell did you with your beliefs to be able to something like that?

    • Most funny thing – I though we are similar and learned a lot from you (verbal escalation, very good body language, projecting high value, tracking ovulation, etc…)

      But you know, right now I am just disgusted.
      Getting poor chick all way to London just to break her like that – can you fell good after that? If so – your inner game must be pretty fucked up.

      I am out from there [And take your poor reading comprehension with you. K.]

  12. Completely agree with you that being straight up and breaking up is the best way to do it… I’ve learned that from hard experience.

    As I wrote when I first started my blog, “Breaking up with a girl

    If you see it’s not going to work, be straight up. A tendency for some guys is to put gradual distance between the two of you, but this often drags it out and hurts her more.

    Man up and at least do it over the phone. Not via sms. Have some respect.”

    Hard experience taught me this was the right thing to do.

    http://3rdmilleniummen.wordpress.com/2012/07/18/ways-to-get-over-a-girl-part-3-of-3-breaking-up-and-moving-on/

  13. Reminds me of Zagreb, and that was pre-lay, after months of preparing her for the moment of sabotaging her ass furiously, as soon as I saw her all attraction from my end just went. I still have no idea why

  14. Krauser you really are a naughty man! An ex bf got me into reading your blogs and as a woman it’s a fascinating read! You scallywag you! ;) xx [IOI. K]

  15. She seemed … muscular, in the vid. I’ll just attribute it to vid quality. [Yeah, misleading. She was smooth. K.]

  16. I 100% vouch for the picking her up and throwing her onto the bed routine. I do it with a 20 meter walk in between my sofa and bed. Make sure you have good fitness to pull this off or you will look weak.

  17. I would suggest there is a 3rd way, to act super beta when you are with her until she stops being attracted to you. Break eye contact first and look at the floor, fail all her shit tests, say only boring things & stop being interesting, be submissive and not dominating, give her hand in the relationship, perform badly in bed, tell her she is like a goddess for you, etc. [True, but the problem is doing this is nauseating. K.]

    The point is that its all an act to break up the relationship while causing her the minimum of damage possible.

    If its a girl who’s cut off from your social circle you can do this easily with no repurcussions on the rest of your social life, especially if she is in another country. It shouldnt affect your inner game if you are just acting it out like a role and it doesn’t happen often.

    • Sure, but less so than permanently damaging a sweet silly young girl. It depends on one’s priorities. [Won't be permanent damaged, girls are more resilient than that. She's 23, she has a vote. Doesn't mean I should deliberately mistreat her, but she needs to take responsibility for what she gets herself into. At no point did I tell her lies. K.]

      • To be clearer, I was talking in general, not about this girl (I don’t know enough to have a proper opinion about this case), and more as an open ended line of thinking for seduction/game rather than pointing blame at you. But re a girl’s responsibility you’re contradicting yourself since I think you’ve stated before women are more like dogs and children, and shouldn’t have a vote. [Yes, and until they give up that vote they'll be treated as adults. K.]

      • You’re still contradicting yourself. [piss off. K.]

      • Cognitive dissonance. Maybe take some mushrooms again, you were on a roll for a while. In any case respect for the blog, I’ll still be reading.

  18. I think this is an honest and beautiful post.

    A friend of mine and I call this time “lopping off heads.”. And we follow that up w/ “even the torturer is tortured.”. Been there.

    “I firmly believe that every time a girl gives herself to a man with love, she gives a bit of her heart.”

    Love that… “vampire syndrome” – once you cross the threshold, you have new wisdom, but can never go back to full-hearted naivete. This is the risk that comes with experience and growing up…

    Viva el Krauser. Game needs you man. You’re smart/thoughtful. Keep going.

  19. Maybe you felt like you did with the girl halfway through the act because of one or both of the following:
    1. You are jaded and cold-hearted because of your hateful attitude of sexual exploitation of women.
    2. You lost respect for her because you were able to game her into bed without making a life-long commitment.

    Maybe 2 is like a fitness test. I’m patriarchal minded, and maybe you can say I’m redpill. That first comment is not from a feminist minded guy. It’s from a man who thinks women should stay virgins and under their fathers’ care until marriage. You are going around hurting girls–especially if you find virgins and strip away their innocence. You can ruin people’s lives. Do you have any kids running around growing up fatherless because of your being a cad?

    You need to get some better role models than the sex predators who prey on adult women and brag about it on the Internet. Why would you aspire to that? [You need to read Dalrock. K.]

  20. Five days and the video’s gone already. Is that a record?

  21. Pingback: LIGFY – Oct 21 | Society of Amateur Gentlemen

  22. Pingback: Manosphere: Advice For Women On How To Keep A Man (or how not to get Pumped and Dumped) | 3rd Millenium Men

  23. “I had zero interest in my Yugoslav girl after the first lay. I think my mind was made up halfway through, actually. I just felt a revulsion to her. It’s a really weird feeling because logically I could see she was still the very pretty girl I felt uninterrupted strong desire for the preceeding three months. Her behaviour was impeccable. There was literally nothing she could’ve done differently to keep me. It must be so frustrating for her.”
    … she was too beta! Failed a major shit test.

  24. Pingback: When deep conversion goes wrong, it does so dramatically « Krauser's PUA Adventure

  25. Nothing’s more pathetic and unmanly than a man with so low selfesteem, he has to use sex and women, and brag about it to his online friends, to feel worthy. I read your blog just to laugh at you, and to feel disgusted. It’s fascinating to read about someone who has sunk so low. What kind of women would be tricked by a slimebag like you? I guess this must be why you don’t respect them. It’s hard to respect someone who falls for a low quality man such as yourself. Luckily, most men are not like this! I don’t like unmanly beta men, but no one is more beta than the man who measure his value in how many lays he can get, and brags about it. Like you have nothing else to brag about. LOL.

  26. Pingback: I bang my first 23 yr old Serbian singer « Krauser's PUA Adventure

  27. hahah you are so insecure…as a med student who regularly dates girls, gets laid by hb7-10, I’ll say you have deep rooted issues to just use girls for sex. It’s a void in your life that causes you to seek this; whether it[s a lack of affection from family, lack of successful career, or lack of good looks/selfassurance. But this is pathetic. I like self improvement but not at the expense of someone else’s feelings, what goes around comes around…take care my friend [A guy banging 10s does not talk like that. Nice try. K.]

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