Evolution 2: Stasis

May 1, 2010

Part Two of Four: The Current Structure of My Game

Each time I go out I have something new I want to work on – a little tweak in technique or attitude, perhaps a different opener or DHV story. While my conscious mind is focused on that, there’ll be a whole bunch of other internalised behaviours (good and bad) which are expressing themselves without much conscious direction from me. So I thought I’d try and step back and analyse what factors I’m employing in one of my standard daygame pick ups.

Pre Approach
-Babble endlessly with my wing about whatever is interesting me, which is usually about 50% game related and 50% whatever. Poor Suave is usually on the receiving end of this prattle. The purpose is to get outside of my head, socially lubricated, and not allow AA to fester.
-Constantly scanning the horizon to sort girls into the three categories of approach, maybe approach, and invisible. Usually I’m looking for single girls ambling aimlessly and displaying strongly feminine presence. I also keep an eye out for other demographic niches such as tall bitchy Russians, timid colourful Japanese and dusky brown Mediterraneans. I always avoid the blonde Essex types.
-When a target gets close, I tell my wing I’m going in, click the spycam on then will either (i) run my two-second NLP state building routine or (ii) mutter “fuck it, let’s get blown out”. Both are pre-frames to minimise the emotional impact of rejection.
-As I jog after the girl I’m more likely to be laughing at the ludicrousness of dodging through traffic to get to her, or thinking where is the best spot to open where there’s a lock-in post near.

Opening and Stack
-I’ve got a few basic opening types and usually don’t make my mind up which I’ll use till I’m a second or two away. I go through phases where I’ll use one type for several sessions in a row. It used to be direct, now it’s more indirect-direct. Apocalypse openers are usually for when I’m in a funny mood, the girl has barely beaten my approach quality threshold, or there’s just something about her that is far from my usual type.
-I always without exception command her attention in a strongly dominant manner, so much so that six months ago it would’ve felt extremely intrusive. It’s taken hundreds of approaches to build this basic confidence. It’s the single biggest reason why nearly all my sets hook.
-My eye contact is very strong now. I try to mesmerise the girl and use my eyes to glue her feet to the ground. My frame is usually “this woman will hear what I have to say.”
-The stack is usually a comment about her appearance that immediately becomes a colourful story showing imagination and confidence. For example I’ll describe the fantastical world where she’d fit in. It’ll contain a tease that is partly flattering and partly makes her self conscious.
-When then thread is about half done I’ll switch to a question on what she’s doing today and be ready to pick up the conversational slack with a story on what I’m doing, which will contain a mild DHV. That will be the jumping off point to ask mild screening questions and go off onto whatever tangent she provides.
-Every single set is different. Even when I’m working on integrating a particular story, things get juggled and personalised to the girl. I’m trying to project naturalness and making it a real conversation tailored to the girl.

-After a minute or so I look to lock in. First I’ll turn her by sidestepping around her while I keep eye contact and talking. I don’t do it during a gap in conversation – always when I’m in midflow of an interesting sentence. If she doesn’t follow I nudge her round.
-Then I do the “shameless Suave lock in”. I lean back and work on steadfast alpha body language. By this point I’m pausing more and letting her carry the conversation. This is the momentum shift into her qualifying for me.
-I’ll be kinoing and laughing more by now, having implicitly agreed that she was worth the effort of approaching, even if I’m not sold on whether she’s worth seeing again (this is just the frame – obviously I only approach girls I do want to bang).
-I’ll now be working rapport and comfort, throwing only light hit and run DHVs of a sentence here and there. Usually it’ll be a cultural / geographical observation prefaced with “When I lived in Japan…” or a “My girlfriend at the time used to….”
-I’ll really amp up the emotionally evocative language and use my words like paint on the canvas of life. The love bubble is building and I’m taking her out of the humdrum of mediocre life and into the fantasy world of pleasant emotion. All anchored with kino, of course.
-I’ll be seeding the bounce. My favourite is the childhood sweetshop story.

-I should’ve gotten a good feel for her mood and logistics by now so if neither of us is time constrained I’ll start to work the bounce. It’ll normally involve a leading gesture and then start walking with the implicit assumption that she’ll follow. If it fails, I’ll immediately go off onto another story as if it never happened – I want to obliterate the memory of her refusal before it’s had a chance to enter the historical record.
-Lately I’ll begin the close with Facebook. I’ll throw a mild qualifier (“I was right, you really are fun”) then go for the add usually assuming the sale (“Ok, I’ll add you” then get out the phone).
-While taking the Facebook I soften and distract by starting a new thread even if it’s AFC stuff about the nice weather today.
-I transition to the number with a “There must be hundreds of you with that name. If I can’t find you I’ll text, here” and hand the phone. Not convinced yet how effective this is.
-Talk some more so it doesn’t frame the entire action as being about me trying to get her number. If she’s still relaxed and enjoying the interaction I’ll try for an instant date again.
-When we do say goodbyes I’ll give an oblique statement of intent along the lines of “You know, I think I’m going to like you.”
-As I walk away, turn off the camera, grin widely, then say something positive to my wing about what I enjoyed about the set so I lock in a positive reference experience.

Now that I’ve written it out it seemed awfully mechanical for “natural game”. Hmmmm.


  1. Pingback: Weekend Link Fest – French Pop Tart edition « Seasons of Tumult and Discord

  2. Wow this is a really good post into how your game works and how your thinking works.
    Might use this as a reverence.
    Unfortunatly i do agree with your last statement

    “Now that I’ve written it out it seemed awfully mechanical for “natural game”

    But surely there must be a method to all this game madness

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