Health Indicator Tracking

February 11, 2021

Reading that Lifespan book, there was a particular paragraph that inspired me. Sinclair predicted a near future in which we can wear bands or sensors that will monitor our heartrate, blood, and sweat in real time to feed the information into computer analysis that will then provide early detection of imbalances, illness, and life-threatening conditions. “That sounds like an easy way to keep on top of your health markers” I thought.

The next day I walked past an electronics shop that had Fit Bands in the window. Oh, right. These things already exist! I remember seeing Tom Xants wearing one a year ago and chastising him for the obvious faggotry when he could’ve had a chunky r-select watch instead. Well, 2021 is the Year Of Krauser Faggotry as evidenced by my use of Vitamin C facial serum and an almost total ban on alcohol [1].

I investigated.

It quickly became clear there were essentially two types of fitness tracker bands: watch-like expensive ones by recognised high street brands, and cheap band-like ones by dodgy chinks. Naturally, I favoured the latter. At least until I get a better idea of what info I want. It seems they all do basically the same three things: pedometer, heart rate monitor, sleep tracker. It’s the last of these that interest me most now that I’m currently reading Matthew Walker’s Why We Sleep. He lists so many health ramifications of poor sleep that I felt I was developing Type 2 Diabetes and Insomnia just reading it.

So, 2021 is the year Krauser optimises his sleep.

I bought this slanty cunt

After comparing all the chinky slant-bands on the internet and by Serbian shop prices, I settled on the Xiaomi Smart Band 5 for a tidy £35 [2] and it had upgraded features from the Smart Band 4 (namely it can differentiate sleep types) and it matches my phone, a Xiaomi Mi Somethingorother. I slapped the bastard on my wrist, synched to the Mi Fit app and watched the magic happen.

Here’s my sleep data so far (open to get higher res image)

Fairly promising in terms of being in the better half of my peer group and getting just about the recommended 20% REM sleep and 15%+ NREM deep sleep. I also have the right profile, of getting most of my deep sleep early and the REM sleep later in the night. It seemed rather odd to me that a wrist band can track such things based on your wrist’s pulse when scientists such as Walker use an ECG to measure brain waves to detect the distinctive signatures of REM, deep, and light sleep. Is this device accurate? Here’s a dorky kraut who actually compared my band to the readings given by scientifically approved instruments:

His conclusion:

  1. Pedometer is very accurate
  2. Heart rate monitor is accurate for everything except short bursts of frenetic activity, such as weightlifting. This is because it only measures every minute rather than continuous, and thus can miss much of the short spike in heart rate [3]
  3. Sleep tracker undercounts REM and NREM Deep sleep. This is actually great news because it means my sleep is even better than the Smart Band registers.

The hun said he’ll do another more detailed comparison based on a much longer sample size in a few weeks so I’m keen to see his results. If the band is consistent in it’s sleep tracking error then I can easily adjust for it. If, however, the errors are erratic then it’s of limited use.

As for heart rate, I’m doing just great. My resting heart rate is around 50bpm which puts me in the athlete level of fitness according to experts [4]. The graph below shows a nice steady low beat when I’m sleeping and then nothing too excitable when doing hard training – though with the proviso that this Smart Band apparently fails to capture some of the higher spikes.

High value, scientifically measured

So, everything looking pretty good so far but I wish to optimize. I’m already looking into a few tweaks that I can talk about later

Nothing optimises daygame better than my Daygame Overkill video instructional series available here. It contains ten in-field recordings of me pulling hot skirt and detailed analysis of what you see in them.

[1] Not to mention shagging.
[2] £26 on Amazon but you might as well be buying a lottery ticket with Serbia’s postal service.
[3] That spike is indeed short on a fit cunt like me.
[4] A chart I found by Googling.

NOTE: in case you’re wondering about the stress levels, I’m doing just great, thanks for asking.

Cool chill alpha vibe, yesterdau


  1. Might want to look into reducing caffeine for better sleep. N=1 but since I swapped to ~2 cups a day or one and an espresso based drink and not after 3pm my sleep improved substantially and I got to sleep faster too. [Yep, I started a post-4pm coffee ban three days ago based on the book’s advice. Seems to help. K.]

  2. What’s rarely mentioned is a mattress that suits you. If custom made and fitted for you mattresses were available, it would be a game changer.
    Mattresses seem to be like shoe fit and comfort – everybody is different.

    • How exactly do you fit a nice mattress into the ‘true PUA lifestyle’ TM? That usually involves booking on AirBnB where sub-letters are usually renting out to dozens of short term tenants, usually by cutting every corner they can in the process. That results in you getting the worst mattresses to sleep on)

      The only solution I can think of which admittedly doesn’t sound great is to train yourself to sleep like the Japanese on a tatami (mat) placed on the floor. I suspect that its better for your back (if you sleep on your back) if a little unconventional.

      I think the PUA brain trust needs to put their collective minds to finding a solution to this tricky problem. No point trying to learn fancy game if you are so tired that you cant even remember what you had for lunch the previous day). Perhaps you could offer a prize (including everlasting PUA glory) on your blog to someone who comes up with the best solution to this problem?

      • I’ve made it a point over the Years when I’m staying in a hotel and the mattress is particularly good – I’d roll back the sheets in the morning and take pictures of the make and label etc.
        One American Air hostess I was banging and staying with in various five star Hotels all over Europe thought it hilarious 🙂
        Biggest surprise? It wasn’t the most expensive Hotels that had the best mattresses, I swear to f*k the “brick” of a mattress in the Ibis hotel beside Luton airport is the best!

    • @Romeo, On Ibis, yes Ive noticed their mattresses are really good, in fact I believe some years back the company made this one of the primary USPs. I think you are right that upmarket hotels dont necessarily have the best mattresses (although they are never terrible from what I’ve found). Ive found them to often use overly soft ones, because I guess there is a customer perception that softer is more comfortable and luxurious.

      On the ‘true PUA lifestyle’ hotels aren’t really favoured though, so what do you do when staying in apartment rentals? [Back when I was corporate, I found five star hotels like Hilton, Sheraton and Inter Continental had fantastic beds. K.]

      • @Zatara grin and bear it, a few places have crippled my back. Anybody tried Mike Lindell’s mattress topper? or any of his stuff? I’ve tried that Emma mattress with the 100 day trial – soft as shite that crap.

      • @Krauser, Def thought Hilton had the best of that lot.

      • Yes your right that Emma mattress which is advertised all over is pointless. A good topper if we can find one isn’t a bad idea if you can take it with you as an additional piece of luggage although probably have to check it in. Still worthwhile doing if you are going somewhere for some time.

      • @zatara Buy a cheap topper locally off an online aggregator website. Boom, I solved it. Wheres my glory?

  3. Totally recommend to quit coffee. I just fall a sleep at midnight after 5 minutes in bed, with some boring podcast.

    I have lamp on timer, so I wakeup at 5:00 to bright light. Sometimes I wakup 3 minutes yearlier and just wait for lamp to switch on.

    I am fourty, no coffe for 5 years. My sleep is like clockwork for past 3 years. [You get 5 hours sleep a night, regularly? K.]

  4. I was into the health tracker craze with the most recent purchase being an Oura Ring. Despite the hype and supposed accuracy, I sent it back after 30 days because I found monitoring all this minutiae shit pointless. Best way to track my health is to notice at the start and end of every day “how do I feel?” And tweak things from there.

    Bit tired? Extra sleep, wind back the intensity of the gym. Feeling stressed? Meditate, hang out with friends, hike and interact with nature. Feeling depressed? Do something for someone else, make sure the diet, sleep and health boxes are ticked, and/or do something radically different to challenge the mind.

    All the health trackers did were stress me out when I’d get up in the morning and it would say, ‘better take it easy today – don’t push it too hard, your sleep was shit etc” whereas I’d be feeling on top of the world. Fuck that noise, you don’t need it.

    Get blood work done regularly and you’ve got all the info you require, really.

    • Have to agree with you there Shawn, there is a massive danger of over analysis with this stuff.

    • I agree, I think the health tracker business is just an extension of wearables/apps trying to commercialise new areas. Just as social media tech is a replacement for natural socialising, so this health tracker business is a replacement for listening to your own mind and body for wellbeing. In fact I believe if you build a reliance on such devices you will over time lose the ability to sense your own wellbeing. An example is that I stopped wearing a wristwatch to tell time about 7 years ago. I can now tell the time to within about 20mins, usually much less, without looking at another clock for most of the day. Probably comes with subconsciously being attuned to judging light and dark outside. When I wore a watch for most of my life I was unable to do this.

      The only instance I would use these health monitors was if I a) had a health issue eg heart problems, sleep dysfunction etc b) was an elite athlete and could spend a great deal of time and energy behind analysing and optimising the output of the data to work out exactly how much and what type of training, diet etc gave some fractional advantage in performance. Otherwise this is a recipe for neurosis.

  5. No fucking dink trinket is going to tell me how to behave

  6. You might really enjoy reading Peter Attia, he is all about longevity.

    His blog is pretty cool, i subscribed for awhile.

  7. Pingback: My Sleep Stack: Everything I Throw At The Wall For Better Sleep And Why – Thomas Crown PUA

  8. Hey Krauser, have you tried virtual reality yet? You love gaming, and it’s got to the point with the Oculus Quest 2 that you can have really good workouts in there. I stopped playing video games in the 90’s, but I burn over 500 calories a day in ‘Thrill Of The Fight’, as well as it being more fun than shadow boxing.

    Oh yeah, did you see this?

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