Since I made the conscious move towards presenting myself purely as the r-selected male, I realised that many ideas that used to trouble me just slipped away into the category of “meh!” So much seduction community advice is unwittingly targeted towards k-selected chumps and thus will create cognitive dissonance (and mixed signals) for the man walking our path. As a self-diagnostic tool here are some giveaways that show you haven’t yet made the leap. If these describe you, you’ve got inner game work to do.
- Men give love for sex. Women give sex for love. This is a standard sexual relationships trope that is completely wrong. Women have two types of sex – transactional and validational. They are either fucking you to get something (k-selection) or because they actually enjoy it (r-selection). So this trope is basically a condensed aphorism of the k-selected male’s mindset. He thinks he has to trade something other than his own sexual value in order to fuck the woman. Once you believe deep down women are fucking you for the sheer pleasure of it, you’re “getting it”. And if you’re not sure, watch what happens when you try to come on her face. If she dodges it, she has you in the “doesn’t get it” box.
- You get angry that women cheat. This just means you are the guy they cheat on rather than the guy they cheat with. The k-selected guy is pumping his time, effort, provisioning and protection into the relationship in order to build a comfortable nest for his mate. Therefore any time she flies the nest, such as a foreign holiday with her girlfriends, he is instinctively frightened. Whether his ego will recognise it or not, his gut feel knows she’s likely to cheat. The r-selected male absolutely loves the fact women cheat because that’s the narrow window of opportunity that gives him so much sexual gratification. He’s happy to send her back afterwards to another guy’s nest. If hearing “I have a boyfriend” cause your hear to sink, you’re k-selected. If you think “great, she’ll fuck much faster”, you’re r-selected.
- You divide women into Good Girls and Bad Girls. When I see a girl slink past showing a navel piercing, dyed black hair and a bitchy expression I don’t think “slut”. I don’t rule her out or demote her because I’m not interested in a relationship anyway. I look at the sexual vibe oozing out of her and think “she’s up for it”. Likewise when I see a slightly stiff modestly-dressed girl glide past carrying a library book I don’t assume she needs several dates of wining and dining. She’s just as horny and just as up for it fast, if I do things right. So if you find yourself ruling out “sluts” (mainly because their awareness of their own sexual power scares you) and thinking Good Girls are going to be harder to fuck, you’re still k-selected.
- You believe in God. I see this all the time in the manosphere, especially in the US. Men will recognise the intellectual fact that women have a dual mating strategy and then write reams of self-righteous vitriol about how these women are in rebellion against God and thus tearing down civilisation. Now, I’m not saying this is incorrect. The problem is faith is a monumental cockblock in seduction for the same reason it is a barrier to technological and societal advancement – you are hamstringing yourself to an ancient code of conduct that may (or may not) be relevant in the here and now. Just as Muslims will never create advanced productive societies for as long as they base their social organisation on a 7th century system (e.g. forbidding charging of interest and thus mispricing the time value of money), religious Christians will never truly let themselves jump into the Secret Society whether it be due to a genuine moral opposition, or just a trumped-up rationalisation to weasel out of actually doing the hard work to get good at women. So, if you’re joining that tedious status-jockeying comment competition on Christian blogs over who is the most alpha head of household for his fat housefrau and insufferable children, you’re k-selected.
- You argue with feminists. The key goal of feminism is to remove all limits to women optimising their hypergamy. The march of time has gradually constrained k-selected male’s sexual options while freeing the women to alpha-chase (r-selection). Being angry about this is a giveaway that you identify with Team K-Selection. Just like the previous point I’m not saying the “angry at feminists” thesis is factually incorrect – it’s the fact you’re angry about it (rather than emotionally detached) that gives you away. It means you’re hankering for the white picket fence / pillar of the community 1950s American Dream where you work hard then come home to a hot dinner cooked by your loving wife. Feminists are fucking with that, so you fear an r-selected world both from personal preference (civilisation is, after all, rather pleasant) and an instinctive recognition that you can’t get laid without the beta support structure.
To boil this all down to a simple heuristic, just look deep into yourself. Identify the emotion you feel when considering successful players, loudmouth feminists, and general civilisational decline:
Anger and a personalised sense of loss = you’re k-selected
Indifference and a personalised sense of opportunism = you’re r-selected