Back when I was a scrawny teenager trying to find my way in the world I attended karate class with my brother. This was in 1991 and thus pre-UFC and the whole MMA revolution that followed. We’d all line up in the sports hall and throw crappy punches into the air, which seems rather quaint now. There was a guy in the class called Dan. Since continuing my martial arts education I’ve encountered lots of “Dans”. They have some combination of the following:
- Late thirties or older
- Strange obsesso hobbies such as urban cycling or creating minimalist music
- Functioning social skills but rather bristly about doing things their own way
All classic gamma identifiers but not limited to that rank of the socio-sexual hierarchy. The reason Dan amused us so much was because of a predictable ritual that would happen every single class like clockwork.
- Teacher shows us a new move or kata then patiently walks us through each step.
- Teacher starts counting out ten repetions of said movement with class following along as best they can under teacher’s eye.
- Class continues to count out repetitions while teacher mingles with class to observe each student’s technique in turn, making corrections or giving praise.
- Dan is always doing it wrong, in some weird idiosyncratic manner. Teacher corrects him and Dan starts doing it right.
- The moment the teacher turns his back, Dan goes back to his “I know best” weirdo-style.
Unsurprisingly Dan made zero progress in the six months it took me to realise karate is shit and to ditch it. I’ve now encountered Dan’s brethren dozens of times in every martial art i ever studied. Game is full of Dans and this is the problem
They think they know best.
Dans display donkey-like stubborness and refusal to change. They may pretend to listen and follow instructions while under your watchful gaze but it’s a sham. They have no interest in learning. Attending your bootcamp is just an elaborate reality-weave to convince themselves they are doing something about their lack of women. Deep in the dark recesses of their mind they think they are better than you. Who are the worst students on a bootcamp? Who is least likely to show up on the second day?
Funnily enough its not the five foot tall indo-chode. It’s the white Euro guy who is pretty successful in another area of his life.
Normal men can take a telling. They can put their ego aside, recognise doing what they’ve always done will only get them what they’ve always gotten. Beta males are a pleasure to teach. Gammas / Higher betas / Dans are often a nightmare. They’ve acheived something in life (unrelated to women) so they stubbornly cling to the I know best frame:
- They’ve climbed Mount Everest
- They’ve built a successful business
- They have a ton of money
Whatever it is, these guys are Dans. They are a sub-set of the Perma-Chode family. This is the family of chodes who will simply never get it. No matter what you show them, how you drill them they simply don’t have it in them to become cool. Some are too short, too dumb, too anxious, too Indian or whatever. Some of them have all the physical and intellectual tools necessary but simply cannot face reality – They are Dans.
December 10, 2013 at 2:53 pm
I know a Dan or two. Article puts things in perspective
December 10, 2013 at 4:03 pm
This reminds me of the tombstone which says “I had the right of way”.
These pitiful guys are clinging to some source of egotism like it’s a matter of life or death.
Interesting how an egotist typically has lots of self-loathing too.
Realistically moderate self-respect is the most liberating choice,
so you’re free to try things and risk failure;
knowing you can shrug and keep trying; move on…
December 10, 2013 at 6:28 pm
December 10, 2013 at 4:45 pm
This blog had me laughing quite hard, I’ve witnessed quite a few Dans in other area’s of my life. Within a certain context they are pretty funny. The only thing that frustrates me about them is that they waste everybody’s time, that price is just a bit too big for me to be able to constantly tolerate them. In a way, their existence is just a massive joke.
December 10, 2013 at 4:59 pm
the Dan’s need to read the Tao and practice it. but they don’t, and then there is one less man to mount a challenge to my agenda.
December 10, 2013 at 5:01 pm
Just playing devil’s advocate or whatever – Could it be that they can’t learn something unless they know WHY it works rather than just accepting that it does? I know I grasp lessons far better if I know the why. I have learned far more from this blog than others who merely discuss game ‘technique’ because you also go into the theory underlying it. [I agree. My experience of Dan’s is that explaining the whys doesn’t help. It’s not rational for them. They are responding emotionally to patch up their delusional reality. K.]
December 10, 2013 at 7:12 pm
Krauser, what advice would you give to someone who realizes he has gamma traits in himself / has been a gamma (with all the horrific implications) until now? [The most important obstacle is realising you are gamma. Once you have that self-knowledge, read up as much as you can on gamma (e.g. Alphagameplan – he both writes about gamma and ironically is still deluded, thinking he is no longer gamma) and then be mindfull of how it applies to you in each area of your life. K.]
December 10, 2013 at 8:09 pm
Hey K, why do you think Vox is still a gamma? [I probably shouldn’t badmouth him because he’s a very good blogger. Just try reading his posts with an eye to his self-image and how he handles feedback rather than the actual logical content of his posts. In particular look at his initial series of bust-ups with John Scalzi when they were both contesting the election for the SFWA about a year ago. K.]
December 11, 2013 at 1:13 am
One of the key traits of a Gamma is he has a hard time looking at himself as he really is.
December 11, 2013 at 4:03 pm
TY for your kind reply.
December 13, 2013 at 7:25 pm
First ive heard about vox being a gamma. hopefully this creates a shitstorm. that said, ive read posts about you criticising and generally not accepting of negative comments on your blog [Everyone can go fuck themselves. K.]
December 10, 2013 at 9:30 pm
It’s been 9 months since I done my bootcamp with daygame.com and I also did a 1-1 in the Summer!
I was wondering if you give 1-1 lessons in London?
It would be a pleasure work with you !
December 10, 2013 at 10:48 pm
Krauser, is having a ton of money really unrelated to women?
I mean if we are speaking of “a ton of money” then that mean having no need to earn a wage, that mean no longer have to be a beta 8 hours a day, etc.
Do you think that the different areas of life are that compartmentalize? My vision of life is more holistic : when you improve one area of your life then the others will improve too.
For example the day your net worth rocks, then you become better with women (not because beta game but because you are a happier/more confident/more autonomous human being).
Do you think I am wrong? [IMO yes. I’ve seen plenty of rich chodes in the City who can’t fuck hot women. K.]
December 11, 2013 at 2:36 am
That is very true, a very successful local real estate agent, not a bad looking guy objectively, resorted to the “carry cute dog to bar/club to gain positive attention” nonsense. Cannot imagine more Gamma behavior then doing so.
In his head, he could not understand why women were not just tossing themselves at him, despite the large $$$ in the bank.
December 11, 2013 at 3:02 am
My opinion on this…
You don’t need a ton, but you need some level of extra money.
Good logistics, good clothes, admission to clubs, dates, etc. will cost some money.
For example, I went out in a city that’s far from where I live. Met a girl in the club, pushed for SNL, came close but didn’t get it. Exchanged numbers and set a date for the next week. I had her meet me in a hotel bar in that city. Things went good, I suggested we get a room. Banged.
Game did all of the real work, but Money played a part too.
I think the best bet is for a man to make as much money as he can, and at the same time, go out as much as he can.
Confidence from other achievements does spill over, but Game is a specific skill that needs it’s own attention, imo.
December 10, 2013 at 11:52 pm
Lol – why are Indians so bad with women?
December 11, 2013 at 6:04 pm
Poor social skills. High visuospatial skills and low verbal. They are naff and uncool.
December 11, 2013 at 12:40 am
But a certain type of entitled princess flatters chodes (in my social circle) so that they think they are doing great but in actual fact they drive these girls to places, dance with them and otherwise act like eunuchs who never get laid.
Until I understood this dynamic I did envy these “nice guys” who try hard but become the servant putting girls on a pedestal.
December 11, 2013 at 10:09 am
Gamma guys BELIEVE they are in fact alpha. Its quite funny really but also incredibly sad.
December 11, 2013 at 1:13 pm
This gamma thing scares the shit out of me, what happens if you end up facing who you really are and that you can’t change that much. Can you go back in the bubble after or has that reality burst it forever?
December 11, 2013 at 1:46 pm
In my experience, Game is a mixture of things, compiled into one.
I look at it like a pyramid with the base being your confidence, self-esteem and the things you say, which mainly sorts itself out once your inner game is solid. Above that, you have your social life, your body and fashion sense, hobbies and the apex of it, your financial situation. Like a Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs but in reference to Game.
The problem is, the majority of guys tackle this in the wrong order and think they can cut corners and avoid the hardships of rejection.
If you had nothing else going for you but rock solid solid confidence and inner game. You’ll realise that everything else is simply small icings on the cake that really doesn’t matter. Otherwise you’re simply going to be an empty shell. Good looks, fashion and money will never compensate for a weak identity. [Agree with last paragraph. K.]
December 11, 2013 at 7:15 pm
This hit home in a big way. The saddest thing about the Dan phenomenon (and gammas in general) is that it is nearly impossible to convince someone that they are delusional when they believe with all of their heart that they’re secret geniuses that have everything figured out (yes: I am speaking from experience and am still fighting this within myself). Its some Inception-level bullshit to break them out of the cycle when they are 100% convinced that *you* are the one uninitiated into the true ways of the world and – thus – everything you say works in counter as reinforcement to their distorted view.
Their only chance, imo, is to be kicked in the teeth by life so hard that they’re forced to re-evaluate. Would a truly ‘brilliant’ man find himself jumping from one dead-end job to the next? Would a ‘Casanova’ find himself incel for years? The answer to both is no, and if the pain from those unfavorable conditions is enough the person might just wake up and realize that the problem is themselves.
tl;dr Gammas/Dans need a punch in the fucking mouth.
December 11, 2013 at 7:23 pm
I suppose there are a lot of average Dans. But every once in a while you get a Dan with a brain who says, “You’re all wrong!, like Einstein.
December 12, 2013 at 6:11 pm
Einstein stole theory of relativity from an Italian physicist.
Mencken questioned Einstein along with Freud and Marx, claiming all three were erudite bullshit artists basically
History has proved the latter two WERE
2 years ago the Italians supposedly disproved Einstein. The test was then called out on a technicality. The Italians, under pressure, declined to retest the theory
Gammas are BS erudite talkers. No doubt like the three men above there is legitimate intelligence, the question with Gammas and others, is hood winking vs. real men who will call them on it ( Gammas vs. Alphas/Sigmas)
The Gammas win when society cannot question them publicly
December 12, 2013 at 8:28 pm
You are delusional. Einstein is correct about relativity. Didn’t steal it from some Italian guy. Made additional contributions to physics sufficient to get him his Nobel prize that did not even mention relativity.
December 12, 2013 at 8:36 pm
December 12, 2013 at 5:04 am
Is there any blog post or place that sums up what a gamma is and how to tell if you’re one? I see K write about gammas all the time and from what he says you would assume they are the worst men on earth.. worse than omega going by K’s write ups.
December 12, 2013 at 5:26 pm
Hey Nick, can you show us an example for “minimalistic music” created by “Dans”?
December 12, 2013 at 6:20 pm
BPD is a concocted invented psychiatric scam
What you’re describing, manic depression, and I’ve thought a good deal about this, is probably SX dominant men ( enneagram – Ichazo/ Naranjo) who are managing vs overindulging sex. When they hold back and manage they are in the manic phase – the sexual instinct is transmuted (Napoleon Hill) into ” fucking the world” ( stunning constructive accomplishment) vs. “fucking pussy” ( depleting the sexual instinct
The latter leads to the “Depressive” phase. It seems many of the great men of history were manic-depressives. ( read: SX dominant)
Sinatra called himself an “18 Karat Manic Depressive”. The explanation for the greatest interpreter of popular song was not a chemical imbalance : instead the fact, as a musician once said, “I’ve never seen a guy with so much sex on the brain, “
December 12, 2013 at 9:07 pm
why you thought karate is shit? I think it is better than taekowndo or capoeira…
December 14, 2013 at 1:34 pm
They are all shit!!
Take up a real martial art were you have to compete regularly and were there is knowhere to hide you sink or swim.
Boxing, Muay Thai, BJJ, Judo
December 13, 2013 at 2:31 am
Krauser, I’m a young man, and I continuously approach and approach (i’ve done over 2000 approaches in daygame over an 8 month period) yet I have seen no lays. I have no mentors and no one to turn to for advice (the people I have asked give me advice like “be yourself”, or “focus on inner game”), but focusing on inner-game doesn’t help someone if they are not getting laid? Or am I wrong? There is so much contradictory advice on the net, so now i’m confused.
I really don’t know what to do. Should I focus on inner-game, or use a solid outer-game/method to get laid which would then fix my inner game issues? How does one work on their outer/inner game?
I would greatly appreciate your help, though I understand if you choose not to answer.
December 13, 2013 at 5:10 pm
If you have done 2,000 approaches and not got laid then for now stop approaching; you have other things holding you back which approaching cannot fix. Ruthlessly discover what these are. If you are High-Gamma you will most likely reality-weave/rage rather than face what the insurmountable evidence shows. You have a broken action/feedback/reaction cycle.
If you do it I wish you luck, it will be a nightmarish but ultimately worthwile ordeal. [I’d add that if you’ve done 2,000 sets already take heart that your work rate and self-discipline is far higher than the average man and this will serve you well. Like Bodi says the problem is likely you aren’t correctly analysing your feedback and changing your game. Probably you should do a 1-on-1. K.]
December 13, 2013 at 7:23 pm
Id greatly appreciate a few tips on how imternal issues are fixed? How do I fix a broken action/feedback/reaction cycle?
You are right about the reality weave, where I rationalize that im great with women only to get oneitis and get destroyed. Then for a few days ill feel like shit before becoming deluded.again. ive begun to write down things that happen to me in game, and advice I recieve.
December 13, 2013 at 6:28 am
Damnit, why does it have to be the name “Dan”?
December 15, 2013 at 1:58 am
I hate stubborn people. Pereferably my own fucking mom.
December 15, 2013 at 4:07 pm
What do u think of Johnny Berba Nick? I like the whole natural pickup stuff. He has loads of videos that show u dont need structure. But he doesnt really look alpha. Why does it still work? [It doesn’t work. It’s not natural and he’s not getting laid. It should be obvious from watching. It’s painful and cringeworthy to watch. K.]
December 15, 2013 at 10:52 pm
For something that doesn’t work he’s making a lot of money of it with his bootcamps and coaching. In London I know he has fans. What makes you think he’s not getting laid? He has the most infield pickups on Youtube. Also he doesn’t use the lines. I didn’t see any more than just getting numbers though. Do you know him? [There is so much wrong with the questions you ask. His videos are shit. He builds no attraction. He rips off other people’s method to call it his own. He wildly overexaggerates his claims. I’ve seen photos of his girlfriend, the only fatty in Lithuania. I don’t object to him doing daygame to get himself laid. I do object to him lying to take money out of the pockets of men as guillible as yourself. He’s a joke character. K.]
February 15, 2014 at 1:02 am
This is one of the funniest posts I’ve read in a while. Thanks for the LAUGH k. It’s full of Dans. LOL gave me a good chuckle. Although unfortunate for many of those that are forever lost….
July 13, 2014 at 7:31 pm
“One of the key traits of a Gamma is he has a hard time looking at himself as he really is.”
Surely, that is not quite right, because is there anyone at all that can easily “look at himself as he really is”?
Rather, a scrupulous attention to the feedback from ones environment, indirectly giving a picture of oneself as one really is, is the key?