When you’re a consumer of the internet, it’s quite easy to avoid all the bell-ends and imbeciles. Just don’t argue in comment sections and choose your forums carefully. However, the moment you start running a blog or selling products that changes and you’re immediately subject to a stream of emails from haters, chancers, cheapskates and buffoons. Allow me to share some of them that Steve, Tom and I have had in the past week or so.

1. The barely-literate spazz who wants freebies

“Bud tried many puas but no value. They just want to its ell there products which never work How does one go abt msgin a gal on fb do u know how to get a sure shot reply bud. Would appreciate your help truly. Bxxxx”

Reason he’s not getting laid: Not intelligent enough to make coherent sentences. Insufficient social acuity to know that (1) text speak makes you look retarded and (2) blowing someone off and then immediately asking them for free advice is rude and betrays the wrong kind of entitlement.
Rating: Incel

2. The rambling oddball

“Hey, I was able to figure out how to download the files from the site. It was strange because I downloaded those files originally and then they all disappeared. And so when I learned they were shutting you down I couldn’t at first download them again. So far I got them all. I am listening to your podcast on failures. By the way, I was in Moscow last May. You mentioned some scenarios were woman reacted differently to LMR. I have been studying female psychology for a number of years since my divorce and that is how I came across the pick up community. We never met. I attended a Daygame here in Chicago with Yad and Andy. It was the first time I did this sort of thing. I am divorce and fifty year old man. I enjoy watching your training tapes and I appreciated your commitment as a trail blazer. Anyway, I will send you something (separate email) I found during my research and personal path to my own self-development. You only have to read pages 25 and 26. The six dirty tricks women play. After you read it I am sure you will get it immediately. Shit tests and how to respond to them appropriately. I’ve used this more than anything in verbal game. Never came across the Shaming Feminist as you mentioned in the podcast but now you can understand female Psyche Attacks! And more importantly how to react to them. Sincerely, Wxxx”

Reason he’s not getting laid: He’s an over-sharer and theory junkie, harbouring some anger towards women and inclined to see seduction as a battle. I also suspect he’s a bit of a clumsy manipulator from how he’s dangling the bait of his research piece. If we’d replied, I’m sure his next mail would be 10x longer, unloading his pet theories.
Rating: One lay per year with post-wall chubby.

3. The freeloader who consumes product then demands refund

“hi there, I’m emailing you to request a full refund for my purchase of your video product that i made on August 4th.
I was very dissapointed in the product because the content it contained was not at all what i expected from a product with that name and I felt misled.
Please issue my refund asap. Thanks. Exxx”

So here is my friend’s eminently reasonable reply:

“Hello Exxx,
I’m sorry, but I am not happy to issue a refund.
The sales page gives a full and accurate description of the product and what it contains and is in NO way misleading. There is a full product description, plus I have even issued a sneak preview of what the product contains.
I’ve had nothing but positive feedback on the product thus far.
You’ve had the product 3 weeks and have had a chance to digest all the content, it is grossly unfair to demand a refund after having received the full benefit of watching it.”

Reason he’s not getting laid: He wants something for nothing and has weak moral character. He has watched a product, gestated on it, then expected his money back. He is now disputing the transaction on PayPal to claim her never recieved the product. Zero integrity, which girls sniff a mile away.
Rating: Probably does okay in Rotheram “social circle” game.

4. The Indian/Malaysian incel

Quite literally every day I have at least one comment in my moderation queue from someone called Akmar or Devak where he’s clicked on a girl photo (obviously a modelling shoot) and said “Hi. You’re beautiful. I need sex chat. Add me to skype: [skype name]”
Most recent one: Surykant has commented “I love you” on the girl from my How To Do Facebook Sex Chat. That poor anonymous girl gets the brunt of them.

Reason he’s not getting laid: Spending too much time looking at women on the internet instead of meeting them in the real world. Doesn’t realise that undying devotion to a woman you’ve never met screams neediness. No idea of the SMP tiers, that a smoking hot Russian model will never fuck an Indian basement dweller.
Rating: Waiting for arranged marriage to low-tier village girl.

5. The demands-free-consultation weirdo

“Hi how are you? I watched your video product and ive got a hot Brazilian girl that asked me if im free tomorrow night (she’s got a BF!) what i didn’t understand from your product was, 1) do you build rapport in the first venue only? or do you continue to build rapport in the second venue as well? 2) does seduction happen in only the second venue? 3) can I kiss the girl in the first venue or should I wait till we’ve established rapport and gone into seduction in the second venue? Im really confused because up until now, everything has been step 1, step 2, etc. i.e attraction, rapport, seduction, but in the product do you imply that all 3 themes should be inter-twined from the get-go by fractionation? please reply i have a date this evening :))”

Reason he’s not getting laid: He’s another something-for-nothing guy, though not nearly as bad as the refund guy. He doesn’t seem to realise that people he’s never met are under no obligation to take their own time to help him especially with a tight deadline. I also smell a tendency to treat seduction as a computer program rather than a human activity.
Rating: That Brazilian isn’t hot.

6. The offended white knight freeloader

“Hi,
I bought your video product earlier today. I’m sorely disappointed with it. I mean telling girls they’re animals when you meet them, really.. a 30 year old+ man doing this is just creepy. I’ve even shown it to two female friends, one response was, “what would you tell the family about how we met.. that he thought I was a Giraffe”, the other “I’m embarassed for him”. What I don’t understand, is why you don’t you just tell the girl you noticed her, introduce yourself and ask her name, then ask what she’s doing now (get logistics), walk-with, positive assumptions and riff off that. Which is what rsd and charisma arts have been teaching since 2005.
Please refund my purchase, alternatively I can initiate a chargeback through my credit card company or PayPal if its easier. Jxxx”

Reason he’s not getting laid: He’s firmly plugged-in, taking dating advice from women and extremely sensitive to feminine shaming language. He also has no concept of flirting. If he did get a girl into bed, he’d fail at he last hurdle when discovering he doesn’t have a dick.
Rating: Long-term LJBF with a selection of women

If you’re a normal person you needn’t worry about contacting me. These emails are just a sample from the lunatic fringe. Generally speaking, it’s easy to diagnose a man’s problems with women just by watching how he interacts with men, or normal strangers. It’s even possible from an email. By far the most common reasons are (1) wants to be spoonfed and (2) has no social acuity.