I bang my first 22 year old Serbian dancer

August 15, 2013

Serbia has been giving me serious blue balls of late. I roll up solo on a Friday evening dragging a suitcase and bad attitude. I love the country but I’m worn out. It’s not until Tom Torero flies in from Istanbul the next day that I rouse myself to do some sets. Over the next three days we are restricted to 7pm-11pm because of weather and footfall but we can still number farm the scorching-hot streets per the Short Foreign Gaming Holiday textbook. I collect something like 15 good numbers and the filtering process begins.

One tall girl goes past and I have the familiar DNA-pull but I think “no way, she’s too hot”. Yes readers I still get that feeling. It’s not She’s-so-hot-I’m-not-worthy jitters but more like She’s-so-hot-it’ll-be-tough. I go in, she hooks, I bounce her for a coffee. I lean back and rattle off some light DHVs while letting my eyes drift away and probing her with rapport questions. It goes well. She’s a dancer and student, typical greyhound high esteem and +100 IQ. For half an hour I’m thinking it’ll be surprisingly plain sailing and then abruptly she gets up, makes apologies and leaves. Strange.

Looking back I think she recognised someone and feared social pressure. Whatever. Text game doesn’t really hit and I don’t see her again.

and my height in flats

and my height in flats

Tom gets laid on his 2nd and 3rd nights here. I’ll leave the stories for him to tell but from my end I can just feel the competitive urges bubbling away. A week passes and now it’s the next Thursday. My phone is full of good numbers, good text exchanges and I’ve been on a few dates with very attractive women…. but no sex and only two non-commital makeouts. I’m getting jitters. I’ve literally never failed to get laid in Serbia in my previous four trips. The quality is outrageous mixing the best of Slavic long legs / high cheekbones with the best of Turk black hair and fiery eyes. It doesn’t seem right that I’ve got so many hot girls into me and zero sex.

Thursday night is the worst. At 7pm I get a cute little blonde on a second date. I’ve got a side-project to fuck lookalikes of all my favourite mid-90s porn actresses from Private magazine (that’s what I grew up on as a late teenager). I’ve already had Tania Russof, Aliza, Joy, Tabatha Cash, Myrka and Julia Channel. This blonde is a near-double of Gabriella Bond. Tom had sat our student on the next table on the first date and given him a commentary on my date game and the same thing happens this time. Then I bounce her to a park bench and as it gets dark we make out. She’s straddling me grinding my dick and letting me finger her but no sex. Harrumph!

Better than 007

Better than 007

At 10pm I have a first date with a cute skinny brunette. I bounce her to the same park bench and the same grinding, fingering and wanking off ensues with the same lack of sex. It’s now midnight and I walk home alone with blue balls so bad it literally hurts. Tom is sleeping the “I already got laid twice” sleep. Bastard.

Tom heads off on Friday and I’m starting to move towards thinking I should just farm a few more high quality numbers and try to lock them down with a coffee date. Saturday night comes with a second date of the brunette. This time she’s naked on my bed but still won’t fuck. I walk her to the bus stop at midnight then home. Defeated. I will not be getting laid in Serbia.

So I review my phone. Are there any leads? Aha, that tall dancer bird I idated is at a birthday party today. She’s back in contact with me:

Me 23:05 – A good birthday party then 🙂

Her 23:06 – Party is over we are now haveing the afterparty 🙂

Me 23:25 – I think you’ll be sleeping all through Sunday

Her 23:29 – I’m working tomorrow 🙂 what are u doing

Me 23:30 – Last day so just relaxing. When do you finish?

This is where a misunderstanding really helps. Sometimes you get lucky. I’m asking her when she finishes tomorrow so I can set up a coffee date. Wires are crossed and she thinks I’m asking her about tonight.

Her 23:31 – I don’t know, about an hour, two

Me 23:34 – If you’re still in party mood afterwards, let me know 🙂

Her 23:35 – Wana meet me 2night?

Me 23:36 – Sure. I’m staying up late and I have some alcohol!

Her 23:37 – Hahaha. Where?

Me 23:39 – Hotel Moskova and we can go to the park nearby. What time can you get there?

Her 23:50[from a different phone] in 5 min. My mobile doesn’t work

Me 23:52 – Ok. See you outside.

I got lucky, no doubt about it. She obviously fancied me from the idate but as I later found out she’d had a couple of dates with a local guy in the interim but disqualified him on “lack of chemistry”. Now she’s been drinking with her girls at a party, talking about boys, and getting horny. She hadn’t been laid in six months. Astute readers will have noticed my 23:34 is a covert booty call and her 23:35 is the acceptance of sex. It was now mine to fuck up.

You'll do

You’ll do

I hurriedly dress and run down to the Hotel Moskova. She rolls up in high heels and impeccable dress. I double take at how hot she is. Decision time…. do I sit her down for a coffee or do I bounce immediately. I figure the walking momentum is already there so I just walk her to my apartment five minutes away. She naturally refuses to come up so I just pop in to get beers then sit her down on the same park bench as my previous two blue balls episodes.

What follows are high speed nuclear shit tests, including:

  • “Those countries you told me you visited. Czech, Serbia, Russia. They are full of easy women. That’s why you go isn’t it?” (I call this the “Latvanian Whore” test – every girl thinks every other girl in her region is a raging slut)
  • “I didn’t like your texts. Always talking about eating beef steak. I thought you are a moron.”

I can’t remember them all but it’s a fast barrage. I just stay unreactive and let her burn out. It’s obvious she’s just having a final brain-spazz to derail the train. To seal the deal I drop some intellectual mastery on her because she’s seen Game Of Thrones and Lord Of The Rings so I can pull out my old Cervantes routine. That shuts her the fuck up and I can see the final light turn green. It really is that obvious. She’s now realised I’m both tingly bad boy and TMIMITW. She softly rebuffs two kiss close attempts and then goes for it. I break both kisses first and lean back so she’ll chase me.

Half an hour into the date she’s softly stroking my shoulders. That’s the fuck me signal.

“Let’s get another beer from my house. Or would you prefer wine?”

She says wine and I walk her up into my lounge. From there I just chill, chat for five minutes then let her jump me. The sex is phenomenal as she unleashes six months of horniness onto me. I’m lying on my back watching her rodeo my dick thinking it shouldn’t be so easy to get such a top tier girl. She’s easily one of my five hottest lifetime lays. All I had to do was catch her at the right time and let her talk herself into fucking me. For my part I empty a week’s worth of blue balls onto her face.


  1. brilliant. only one comment. in this post you say:

    “”She’s easily one of my five hottest lifetime lays.”

    but in twitter you said:

    “I banged 3 girls in the last 3 days. 2 new, one repeat. Got a 4th coming on Thursday (repeat). My main emotion is…. indifference. Feels ok”

    can it be both?

  2. Damn. Impressive.

    By the time the video starts, you can tell she already wants it bad — relaxed/horny body language, touching her own shoulder, playing with her own hair. It’s like she’s teasing herself to make it even better when it finally happens.

    This is inspiring for fellow bald/balding guys like myself. Do women ever shit test you about that? Are you not self-conscious about it anymore?

  3. What follows are high speed nuclear shit tests, including:
    ◾“Those countries you told me you visited. Czech, Serbia, Russia. They are full of easy women. “That’s why you go isn’t it?” (I call this the “Latvanian Whore” test – every girl thinks every other girl in her region is a raging slut)
    ◾“I didn’t like your texts. Always talking about eating beef steak. I thought you are a moron.””

    You stayed totally unreactive & just ignored the comments ? Eye roll maybe ? I’m a ‘D’ student on this shit test stuff so elaborate if ya get the chance. I think it was a key moment there where you dodged some bullets

    I also liked how you shrugged off her initial unwillingness to go inside and just went inside and got a few and then tried later. Classic 2 steps forward, one step back etc.

    Highly instructional

  4. “For my part I empty a week’s worth of blue balls onto her face.”

    Thereby proving how much you value your seed.

    • Earl is my favorite manosphere troll. I bet the last time this dude hasn’t gotten laid in at least ten years. I’d also bet a small fortune this dude caught the shitty side of a bad marriage.

  5. Damn, I really shouldn’t be reading these while I’m still in London.

  6. She was right out of the top drawer!

    I imagine while you’re blowing your load over these 22 year old babes you think back to that fork in the road when you decided to take a bootcamp for the first time…. could you of imagined you’d get chicks of this quality??

  7. Let’s get another beer from my house. Or would you prefer wine?

    Always give options so it feels like she’s the one doing the choosing. Nice.

  8. Nicely played

    I can’t tell you how impressive it is to get real honesty in these posts

    “I have the familiar DNA-pull but I think “no way, she’s too hot”. Yes readers I still get that feeling”

    I can remember back in mid-2012 here on your blog, it seemed you were transitioning towards “growing up” and getting out of the rat race of endlessly picking up women. A “low approach/maturity” phase you called it. This was around the time you were doing the Cervantes blog.

    Early 2013 you said “Not quite ready to hang it up” You went back out in full force approaching:


    “in late 2011 as I went through a cycle of game-revulsion. I changed from the high-approach/high-adventure phase to a low-approach/maturity phase. At the time I thought it was a permanent shift, now I’m not so sure.”

    Looking back from now – Perhaps that whole time period in your life was a subtle Avoidance Weasel at play? A way to avoid the Game by thinking you’ve mastered it, when really you would have missed your new plateau this year.

    In 13 you’ve said you are pulling the hottest broads ever while doing the least amount of approaches. The girl in this post, a Top 5

  9. dude, your playing to the camera… just saying.

    Props to you though

  10. Heh, didn’t know Stana Katic (aka Kate Beckett on Castle) is Serbian.

    Excellent report as always K.

  11. Amazing stuff King Krauser. Your an inspiration and the real deal.

    I wish Roosh and the other “big names” would provide evidence that theyre successful with girls like photos and videos.

    Otherwise its like a fat man blogging about fitness lol

    • if they did someone would just say, they paid them for it, and it’s fake. Only way to know is to put in the work and see for yourself.

  12. I’ve also noted the beef steak fixation in your texts – care to elucidate?

    IMO this is the one steak marinade to rule them all – keep it secret, keep it safe.


    Nick probably won’t try it because he’s from Newcastle and up there they like to dip their steaks in batter before deep frying them, while plotting how to murder Joe Kinnear before he gets them relegated.

  13. No panda. Very disapointing.

  14. One point to share. I’m 10 years older than Krauser, good shape, learning and refning my game. I just banged a 27 year old 7, 34C big tits girl I met and gamed on OK Cupid using the techniques and structure K lays out in various sections here. Awesome.

    All the things he points out the shit-testing, the frame control, the man/woman positioning—it took some practice and outreach but the pay-off was awesome.

    The hardest part is sticking to it. There are situations where girls flake, it leads no where, they want attention, the attraction spikes in text-game then fizzles out. But stick with it, adjust the tactics and practice combining different elements.

    • nice work walawala!

      shit test frame control is SO IMPORTANT, it is one of the top three most important things to learn about game. that so few bloggers talk about it is very concerning.

    • Walawala, congrats — well done.
      Question for you:
      When you say “The hardest part is sticking to it”,
      are you saying ‘Don’t give up hope on a particular girl who requires perseverance.’
      or are you saying ‘Keep gaming new women despite the disappointment & frustrations of dead-end outcomes from women who had seemed like a promising probability’?
      [You’re in Asia right?]

  15. I’m in Asia. Yes, keep gaming new women despite being flaked out etc.

    I now learn something from every interaction.

    One example which I thought of only after. I conducted a seminar for my work.

    There were two smoking girls in it, both effectively my clients. After my workshop, one stayed behind after everyone had left and started asking me about “Can you recommend any reading materials about this?”—meaning my seminar.

    She was hot, slim, smoking body…clearly I had DHV’d her.

    But I balked a bit thinking it was my client so I didn’t game her.

    It was only after she’d left I realized…oh….she didn’t really want reading materials she wanted my card or for me to game her.


    In some cases, I game girls and then leave them for a while to return later to pick it up. Krauser calls this “long game”.

    The other learning is not to get too attached to any outcome. To calibrate, to read signs to understand who’s with whom at a party etc.

    I’ve done quite well. Last year I banged 12 girls, half were under 30.

    This year is a bit slower and it’s because my inner game has taken a few hits, something I need to examine..

  16. NOTE: this is not a troll post, it’s a serious question and a sticking point I’m currently at.

    K, got a question for you slightly off topic. Not sure where else to contact you other than here. Based on many past blog posts, you seem to boil everything down to value. You always mention that guys who try to bang “for free” without giving any value and just sucking all the girls value out are headed nowhere and will hardly ever get laid. I agree. Nothing is free in this world. You need to have value to fuck.

    My question to you is, exactly what value do you give all these women you are banging? How is there any value in a pump and dump ( or in nicer terms, a casual fuck )? Since your just a normal looking guy, your value doesn’t exactly stem purely from your aesthetic value or the fact you can fuck her. Sure your very confident and perhaps have interesting things to talk about, but what else? Do you ever feel you put up a false advertisment that never gets fulfilled?( IE: I’m an interesting, confident well off guy and if you fuck me a few times you might have a shot at being my woman. )

    My sticking point is that I wonder what exact value I’m giving to the girl since all I’m doing is banging a few times and then leaving. I feel I’ve taken all she has and given hardly anything in return. Perhaps you can help reframe my thinking. Thanks K.

    • I wish there was an edit key. I’d also like to say this is why many people find the PUA/Mens community “manipulative” and “against women” since nobody ever really explains what value we offer to women other than fucking them.

      • If you’re a strong, confident man that is giving value in itself, just like a hot beautiful women gives you value just by looking good, the problem is most guys are fucking losers. Also you must not realize women enjoy sex more than men so fucking her brains out good is giving a lot of value.

      • It’s pretty simple. The value is the experience you give. If she likes being around you, that’s value.

  17. hilarious last sentence!!!

  18. I hope the girls never find the videos, or Krauser may need his boxing skills for real…. 😉

  19. This guy is full of shit. He writes in North American terms, such as “no chemistry”. Terms like “chemistry” are only used in North American culture, not in European culture, but he applies those terms to Serbian women? He obviously doesn’t know this, since he’s not from Europe, like me, and he’s likely never been there. It’s easy to spot, he’s just full of shit. Also, even though some European women will let you cum on their face, after having sex with them several times, there is no European chick who will let you cum on her face the first time you fuck her. That’s a North American thing. I succeed in doing that here in Canada, but back in Europe I have never, EVER, succeeded in doing that. This guy is SO-FULL-OF-SHIT it’s sickening. [This is what denial looks like. K.]

  20. I think people shouldn write about stuff they know nothing about and your assumption about a “mix of Slavic and Turkish” shows how ignorant you are. Darker hair that some South Slavs, including Serbs, have in a certain degree comes with mixing with Old Balkan population. Italians, Greeks, Thracians, Dacians, Illyrians, Celts… There have been genetic studies that proove this and if you wanna sound smart and make conclusions about genetics of certain peoole it would be a good idea to do a little research first.

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