I’m a horrible bastard

January 16, 2011
krauserpua

This isn’t advice. It’s 5am, I’m in Lithuania, and I’m drunk. Highlights of the day were an instant date with a 19yr old virgin who’s only had one kiss (not one guy, one actual kiss) in her life. She looks like a goer. Also made out with two girls in Salentos and came within a whisker of a 30 second SNL in the toilets (I opened, kissed immediately and told the girl I want to fuck her in the toilets now. She said ok, and we were walking there when the bitch cockblock friend dragged her back).

So, I’m drunk. In a funny mood. My natural arsehole tendencies come out. I’m not in any way suggesting guys should act like I do here. Just giving you a window into what I do. One of my girls opens me on facebook…..

Her – what are you doing awake in the middle of the night?
Me – trying to sleep    suck my cock bitch
Her – drunk again?
Me – yes
Her – easy to see
Me – so that’s a no?
Her – mm come to [her country] first
Me – too far    I’m gonna sleep in a minute    send me a picture of you naked    is it really so much to ask?    I mean,    I’ve seen you naked a million times    fucked you in the ass    cum on your face, in your mouth    and now you are SHY about a photo? [all true]
Her – don’t you have plenty of girls there in Lithuania?
Me – Lots    but if you send a good photo, I promise not to fuck any tomorrow
Her – you said you didn’t want to talk to me. because I’m too far etc. and now I should send you a photo while you don’t really care
Me – basically    yes
Her – you’ll think about that tomorrow when you are sober
Me – perhaps    but for now    photo please
Her – stop it.
Me – I’m a horrible bastard. You know this
Her – yeah I’ve noticed
Me – I’d like a photo from behind    of you feeling yourself    maybe pretending to suck my cock    I dunno    Use your imagination
Her – you know I can’t do that for someone who is just playing with me.
Me – ok    I have to sleep now    Have a good evening
Her – have a good night
Me – 😉
Her – you’re killing me you know
Me – I’m sorry
Her – :p
Me – I don’t want to be a bastard. But I am.    And I actually enjoy it    Sorry
Her – please stop being a bastard with me    I can’t really handle it for now

You can see why I’m putting some work into straightening out my inner game. There’s that nagging pain in my head. Skeletor thinks its my conscience. I’ve got to either deal with it or kill it.

5 Comments

  1. You can see why I’m putting some work into straightening out my inner game. There’s that nagging pain in my head. Skeletor thinks its my conscience. I’ve got to either deal with it or kill it.

    Reminds me of:
    “he has systematically engaged in a campaign to squash every last ounce of humanity out of his soul”

    Many great men have regarded murdering their own conscience as the first step on their path to greatness. Don’t let it bother you.

  2. Not saying it’s a solution to the problem, but personally I’ve resorted to using ‘soz’ over ‘sorry’, ‘I’m sorry’, ‘I apologise’, and variations thereof whenever speaking to someone who is not my parents, upper level management, etc.

    It also has the added benefit of sounding utterly ridiculous if said in person.

  3. Kill it. i couldnt imagine Krauser being nice to women. the universe would implode.

  4. “but if you send a good photo, I promise not to fuck any tomorrow”

    excellent line.

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