The r-selected international playboy

June 13, 2014

I know I’m labouring the point but it’s important to repeatedly stress the benefits of leaping from the K-selection ladder to the R-selection stratosphere. They are two different worlds with completely different rules. There are a couple of good bloggers who live the international man of mystery lifestyle. I like what they are doing. They’ve unplugged and are giving detailed advice on how to follow in their footsteps. Sometimes their material is downright inspirational.

artist's impression

artist’s impression

But I think it confused r/K somewhat. What they recommend is different to what I do. So allow me to split some hairs and explain the difference*

I’ve spent one month in a pleasant FSU city, all of it in the Old Town. That’s a small place where you constantly run into the same people over and over. I’m constantly bumping into girls I know while another girl is on my arm. Let me list them chronologically**:

  1. Jelena is a long-term rotation girl who I bang every time I visit, since mid-2012. She doesn’t have a boyfriend and is focused on her new career, so I’m the sex guy she comes to for a rogering that won’t otherwise upset her life pattern. First night I arrived in town she came round and I took her anal virginity. A week later I fingered her in a cafe.
  2. Anya is a Russian I closed in Estonia last November. She flew down the first weekend of my trip for a three day visit. She’s back home now, pestering me for the next trip.
  3. Jovanna is a folk singer I closed December 2012 and has been something of a primadonna since. On a whim I messaged her when I arrived and she was in town so we had coffee and made out. A week later she’s back in town so we fuck. I’m now her sex guy when she’s in town.
  4. Milicia is a young student who I opened in my first week. She didn’t reply to my feeler text until I’m walking through a park with Anya and bump into her sitting on a bench with her boyfriend. Now she messages me, we have a date a couple of days later, and a booty call one day later. She’s now a fuck buddy.
  5. Bojana is a young girl I opened last year on a residential with Tom. Occasional FB chat because she likes me but has a boyfriend of four years. I get her on a date and bang her within an hour. She’s since bumped into me when I’m with Natalija and Vedrana. She doesn’t care, still wants to see me.
  6. Dragana is a thirty-year old girl who has barely had sex. I open her this trip, escalate hard on the date, and booty call her next date for the close. I told her I’m a player and she’s still pestering me for casual sex.
  7. Natalija is a 19 year old fashion model with a long-distance boyfriend she met when she was 16 and her only prior sexual partner. I banged her on the second date and now she’s a fuck buddy. Last time I fucked her she said “you should give my boyfriend sex lessons”
  8. Radmila is a 26 year old girl who dated me three days before going on a one-month holiday with her boyfriend. She said she’d had sex a couple of days before our date but I still took her home that night. She’s asking if I’ll still be here when she gets back.
  9. Vedrana is a 22 year old virgin I met on the same 2013 residential with Tom. She was scared but let me take her virginity last week. Before that happened, she bumped into me while I was with Anya.
  10. Marija is an 18 year old who I had on my bed sucking my cock on the second date. Three hours before the booty call sex date she messaged me “I can’t see you for a while, my boyfriend found out”. We are still messaging, waiting for it to blow over.
"Do you have an hour spare later today?"

“Do you have an hour spare later today?”

I have a tendency to preen on this blog but note some key points.

  • Four of these girls had boyfriends and step out on them to fuck me. A fifth is highly likely. They all talk like it’s matter-of-fact and no big deal.
  • Three of these girls “caught” me with other girls and didn’t complain. Twice it was before the sex and they came to me anyway. One of those was a virgin.
  • All of these girls are using me as their “good sex guy” and don’t make any demands on my time other than the sex.
  • I’ve been here one month. I haven’t been clubbing, I don’t have any local friends or “connects”.

This is completely different to the K-selected idea of an MLTR. I don’t have to tell lies to any of them. I make it clear I’m a player and then don’t rub their noses in the details. There are no dinner dates, walks around the park and except for Anya I never hold their hands in public. I’m not installing these girls into apartments like mistresses, buying them iPads, or establishing a position in their social circles. I’ve not met a single friend or family member of any of them. The entire relationship is a one-on-one discreet secret. We share affection and connection – we have true moments of the Love Bubble, it’s not “empty sex” – but it’s not a boyfriend/girlfriend thing.

It’s okay to have K-selected MLTRS, it’s just that for my personality type it’s such a……. ball ache. If you can communicate from the very first seconds of the street stop that you’re the Lover then that’s the track you’ll stay on the whole time. Girls have a severe disconnect between Lovers and Providers. Don’t mix the signals. Project R-selection and then you can cut through all of the bullshit that surrounds a K-selection relationship.

Just imagine…. no more time dicking around learning the local language, no social circle obligations taking you away from CounterStrike, no stupid salsa nights, and no looking over your shoulder in case one girl busts you on a date with another.

My priority, yesterday

My priority, yesterday

So decide what you want. If you want a long-term boyfriend-girlfriend / sponsor-moll / daddy-girl relationship then go the K-route and do not feel ashamed of it. That route give a certain experience that can be very fullfilling, especially if you’re a man who prioritises affection needs. If the lifestyle I just outlined is more your thing then you must go the r-selection route.

To learn how to meet girls on the r-selection path, consider my textbook Daygame Mastery

* and if I’ve misconstrued your message, feel free to correct me in the comments.

** names changed, obviously.


The Daygame Monomyth

June 13, 2014

Writing shortly after the carnage of World War Two ceased, Joseph Campbell released The Hero With A Thousand Faces. He contended that there is a fundamental narrative that is told and retold throughout the great stories of history. Beginning with Bart Homer and stretching forwards to airport bookstore paperbacks and Kung Fu Panda, there is one story – the “monomyth” – rooted deep in the human need for storytelling.

A hero ventures forth from the world of common day into a region of supernatural wonder: fabulous forces are there encountered and a decisive victory is won: the hero comes back from this mysterious adventure with the power to bestow boons on his fellow man

That sounds kinda familiar……

The monomyth has been hard-coded into screen-writing advice given to Hollywood scriptwriters – have you ever noticed how every big movie seems to follow the same structure? They call it the Eight Point Story Arc but it’s just a stripped-down monomyth. Some Hollywood writers have even self-consciously structured their movie around Campbell’s model. Consider this comparison (source article here, I recommend you read his full discussion):

Monomyth 1

Monomyth 2

Monomyth 3

I contend that, due to some combination of evolution and cultural tradition, we naturally try to insert ourselves into a personalised monomyth. Read this next section and consider the typical “player’s journey” story, be it this blog or of course Neil Strauss’s famous work of fiction biography.

In a monomyth, the hero player begins in the ordinary blue pill world, and receives a call reads Roissy to enter an unknown world of strange powers game and events hot girls. The hero chode who accepts the call to enter this strange world start cold approaching must face tasks and trials rejection, either alone or with assistance an approach coach. In the most intense versions of the narrative (Tom Torero / Nick Krauser), the hero must survive a severe challenge, often with help. If the hero survives, he may achieve a great gift or “boon” intermediate game. The hero must then decide whether to return to the ordinary world with this boon start writing a blog or coaching. If the hero does decide to return, he or she often faces challenges on the return journey haters. If the hero returns successfully, the boon or gift may be used to improve the world fund a location-independent income from which to euro-jaunt forever.

There’s a reason we insert ourselves into the monomyth. We all like to self-aggrandise and mythologise our own journeys. Not only does it feel good but – more importantly – it cloaks a timid and highly unpredictable challenge with an air of inevitability. When watching movies we see the hero get into desperate straits and feel the dramatic tension but we know he’ll get out of it. Half of the excitement is waiting to find out what ingenious wheeze he’ll use to solve the problem.

The monomyth is a great meta-level inner game hack. By inserting ourselves into a grand narrative, the result of which is pre-determined, we calm all those “can I really make it?” voices that may otherwise cause us to give up.

Embrace the monomyth. Create your own. Let the power of mythology push you through the hard times and into the Final Act of….. younger, hotter, tighter.

Game is the fountain of eternal youth

May 31, 2014

Indulge me for a moment while I preen.

I’ve been out on a euro-jaunt with Bodi and Jabba (and Tom for the first week) since May 10th. In that time I’ve banged seven girls aged 22, 29, 24, 20, 20, 30 and 19 while I’ve also had my dick in the mouth of a 23 and 18 year old. I’m feeling pretty damn good about myself and it really brought something into perspective.

“you are only as old as the woman your feel” Groucho Marx

Game is allowing me to relive my youth. When I was 24 years old I met a 23 year old Japanese girl who became my wife. As I aged so did she and it was a very pleasant time in my life. Then, as regular readers are well aware, she left me and I was suddenly 34 years old and single. I really believed my youth was over. I’d had my time in the sun and now I was entering middle age. Perhaps even a mid-life crisis would beckon and I’d take up scuba-diving or cross fit or something.

Suddenly seemed rather fascinating...

Suddenly seemed rather fascinating…

Oh no! How things were to change….

There’s no such thing as a mid-life crisis for men. As Rollo very precisely explains, “mid-life crisis” is a feminine shaming term for the melancholy and restlessness a man feels when his wife is getting old. Put a nubile 20 year old girl in his bed and he’ll feel the fresh air of youth all over again.

Two days ago on a first date with an 18 year old, she asked my age. As usual I asked her to guess. She guessed 25 (I’m 39). Now that’s an extreme example but girls regularly comment that I’m young at heart, both looking and acting far more youthful than my age. I asked her what she thought about the 21 year age gap – “If you were from this country perhaps I wouldn’t talk to you, I’d expect you to have a family and be boring. But…. I don’t know. You’re English, it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t seem strange. It’s normal to date an older man I think.”

An alternate strategy, yesteryear

An alternate strategy, yesteryear

Since time immemorial people have searched for the fountain of everlasting youth. Countess Bathory bathed in the blood of virgins in her seventeenth century castle. The Crusaders fought their way East chasing the Holy Grail. Whole legends detail the quest for youth. Humans don’t just fear mortality, they fear getting old.

Instinctively we are repelled by people who get old before their time. At university I had a friend called Mark. We used to call him “trainee middle-aged” because he seemed determined to lock himself down to the accounting job / wife / surburban home as quickly as possible. He couldn’t wait to turn into his dad and did so around age 23. He skipped most of his youth. Madness. James Dean he wasn’t.

One pernicuous effect of the Blue Pill is it functions like early-onset Alzheimers. A fresh-faced new graduate will stroll into London with a head full of dreams and a life of opportunity stretching ahead. Within two years he’ll have a wardrobe of blue shirts and M&S suits, a credit card balance and a career-oriented girlfriend. Another couple of years and they’ve moved in together and go to Ikea on weekends. That stuff ages you.

Game is the real fountain of youth. Done correctly you stay forever young in mind and spirit. Twenty years after fucking your 20yr old university co-eds you get to fuck them all over again. It’s like a time machine.

Yes, Daygame Mastery is written by H.G. Wells.

For the gold standard in daygame instruction, try my new book Daygame Mastery.

This is what polarity looks like

May 26, 2014

I talk a lot in Daygame Mastery about the need to establish male-female polarity from the beginning of the interaction. It’s important to live your life in a masculine manner so that your vibe is manly. When you stop the girl, do so decisively and with masculine dominance. You never let the polarity slip. So how does polarity look once you’re banging a girl and keeping her around?

Allow me to show, rather than tell…

Things to note for those insufficiently observant to just see:

  • I have a languid manner with slow low voice and a poker face
  • I’m the tree, she’s the squirrel running around me
  • I’m comfortable leading her, and she likes following
  • She defers to me and qualifies
  • I feed her soft dominance too, giving her smiles and laughs

Polarity isn’t a struggle, it’s a pleasant dance. It fills me with contentedness, and of course look how happy she is. This is what stupid Anglo feminists are missing out on…. the joy of being a masculine man’s woman.

The daygame carnival

May 22, 2014

Daygame has become a cult. I’m as much to blame for it as anyone else and it’s not a particularly bad thing. It’s in the Constitution that every man has the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of pussy. So while I occasionally bristle when I see no-hoper chodes queering Oxford Street with crappy Yad-stops, I do acknowledge that these men have as much right to hunt girls as I do. Good luck to them.

I just wish they’d be more…. finessed about it.

I suspect that 83% of all daygame stops follow exactly this pattern (half of them with an Indian accent):

  • Excuse me, canIjustsaysomethingreallyquickly. IliterallyjustsawyouandIwantedtosay…
  • You look nice
  • You look French. It’syouhairniceeyesandsillyshoes
  • *pause*

When the first-gen daygamers were figuring out the system, the front stop was merely a tool. It wasn’t the One True Way, it wasn’t The Perfect Approach. It was simply a useful party trick to stop a fast-walking girl on a crowded shopping street. We taught it in bootcamps because it’s easy to explain and has wide applicability.

That’s all.

What you think girls see

What you think girls see

Actual real live daygamers who get laid open from the front, the side, by calling “hey you” from a distance, obliquely at a bus stop, across a display table in a book store, in a coffee shop queue…. whatever. The London Daygame Model principles apply no matter what the mechanics of the first two seconds.

Unfortunately what has percolated into noob consciousness is a contrived front stop where every girl is French. This is missing the whole point. Daygame is spontaneous, authentic and based on what that girl makes you feel right there and then. It’s written into Nitro, go have a look. Rote-learning the canned Nice-French-Shoes opener is bastardising the whole thing. It’s like reducing Mystery Method down to a furry hat and Who-Lies-More.

I had the misfortune to hit a nice FSU location this weekend just after a bootcamp and while a few squareheads had jetted in for a Euro-jaunt. So the main promenade was like a carnival of strange men front-stopping everything. The poor girls couldn’t get from one end of the street to the other without five men telling them they look French.

What girls actually see

What girls actually see

And surprise surprise, the girls are defensive. That street now has a reputation for “weird sex tourists hassling girls” as my date last night told me. Fortunately she didn’t connect me to them.

So stop telling girls they look French. Stop standing with your legs splayed like a pyramid. Stop folding your arms precisely twenty seconds into the interaction. You’ve all got the right to try to get laid. More power to you. I write this blog and my books precisely to help you in your quest. But c’mon, use at least a little social intelligence. Daygame is a tool. It’s not a hobby, a fetish, or a club.

To learn daygame without acting like a retard, read Daygame Mastery

2 easy kiss-close gambits

May 17, 2014

Oh my god…. I can’t believe it! Nick has written a directly-practical post without any mental masturbation……

Imagine you’re walking out of Venue Two on your first date. You’ve already regaled your girl with funny stories and interesting takes on historical events so she’s been giggling. Her hand went soft when you inspected her nail polish and now as you walk down the street perhaps she’s “accidently” bumping into you. It sounds like the kiss is on, but she hasn’t quite put herself into position.

Perhaps the venue seating arrangements screwed you. Your favourite booth in the corner was taken so you ended up sitting opposite each other in rickety chairs with a coffee table between you. You tried pulling her in a little and she didn’t seem to take the hint. Hmmmmmm. What to do? You have to make your move before the window closes and you stall out. Time for a gambit.

Pick a visible feature on the street about twenty metres away. A lampost, a letter box, a shop front. Whatever. Then as you’re comfortably walking side by side, point at it.

Venue 2.5

Venue 2.5

You: Can you see that letter box over there?
Her: Where?
You: There, the red one.
Her: Yes
You: When we get there, I’m going to kiss you.

Her reaction doesn’t matter. Maybe she giggles and goes red. Maybe she goes silent. Maybe she pushes back with “no you won’t”. None of that matters. You are Making Your Move so you must follow through. It doesn’t matter if you actually get the kiss, it matters that you were ballsy and calm about going for it.

Don’t rush. Perhaps deliberately go silent as you walk, letting her head spin with anticipation. Don’t babble. If she seemed playfully receptive then make a joke out of taking your sweet time. Fasten your shoelace, check out a shop window – so she knows you’re deliberately dragging out the moment.

And once you arrive at the letter box, turn her to face you, tilt up her chin with your fingertip, and kiss her.



I’ve spent a lot of time honing my girl-doesn’t-speak-English first dates. It’s really not as tough as it sounds so long as you have wi-fi and GoogleTranslate app on your phone. So imagine you’re sitting back in a lounge chair in the dark upstairs room of a cafe. She’s on the seat next to you. She seems to like you and the physical escalation has been all amber or green lights, but the verbal escalation is clumsy.

You’ve already written “I like your eyes. Big and crazy, like a raccoon” which got a giggle. What now? You’re in seperate seats with big arm-rests. Even if she wanted to, she can’t put herself into position for the kiss. But she’s perched on the edge of her seat while you lounge in yours. When you leaned in to tell a story she never retreated to maintain distance. Ok, it’s probably on. How to bridge the gap?

Hold up your finger in the “wait a minute, I want to say something” manner and then type into your phone:

“I’m going to kiss you in thirty seconds”

Look playfully serious, like you are choosing your words carefully. Be patient. Then hit Translate and hand her the phone. She’ll likely give a deer-in-headlights look. Hold your frame. Look peaceably at her and don’t fidget or fill the gap. She’ll start typing. Something like:

“I hesitate”

Take the phone back, and with a thoughtful expression type:

“20 seconds”

Let her stew. Don’t say anything. Be calm, like the oak tree. Then type “10 seconds” and show her that.

Finally, sit up on your chair and take her hands. Put them over your shoulders and pull her in for the kiss.

Might as well agree logistics while you're at it

Might as well agree logistics while you’re at it

These two gambits are easy and yet appear super-ballsy. She gets to experience your sense of purpose and direction, while also getting precious delicious moments of anticipation.

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