My sticking point is……
May 2, 2012 19 Comments
There’s alot of guys out there who are hitting the streets on a regular basis, opening sets, running the model and…… not getting laid. Oh dear.
Daygame is not a hobby. If you’re approaching it with the same attitude you’d take to aircraft modelling, video games, stamp collecting or whatever then you are hamstringing yourself. I understand why people do it this way. It’s new, it’s exciting and you have approach anxiety so you have to make a game of it to reduce the ego strain. I get that. Fine. But at some point you have to move past it.
One of the biggest problems you have to work past in daygame is coming across as lightweight, as a pushover man. In bar game you can prop yourself up at a bar and laugh with all your friends, taking as much time as you wish to build vibe and draw IOIs. In street game you have to approach the girl out of nothing. It’s so easy to make the following mistakes:
- Throw loads of fake positive energy at her, responding “awesome!” to every utterance to fall out of her mouth
- Keep complimenting her past the original opening statement
- Telegraph a lack of confidence in having killed her momentum through filling all the silences and imploring her with your eyes.
I often see guys running up and down Oxford Street like buzzing beta bees. A strong gust of wind would knock them off their feet. They are too excitable, too boyish, too lightweight. If you are one of these guys…. sort it out.
A common misconception in Game is that you’re not getting laid because you have a “sticking point” somewhere in your model. Your model is an end-to-end tactical plan in which you shuttle the girl from stage to stage. It’s all tactics and techniques. So if you are struggling to reach hook point you work on that. If you are getting flakey numbers you need an anti-flake technique. Your success is determined by what you do in set and thus if you just keep approaching, you’ll fix it.
No. No. No.
You aren’t getting laid because you aren’t man enough for the quality of girls you are approaching.
There will be sets where you are merely fucking up your in-set process and thus you can iron out the flaws but these are a tiny minority. Mostly your sets fail because either (i) the girl isn’t available (a high proportion of them) or (ii) she’s not into you. When a girl is available and into you the set will be extremely easy. She’ll cooperate with you to remove all the obstacles between your cock and her fanny. That’s why guys who are good with women seem so smooth and effortless.
High value women do not sleep with low value men.
It’s easy to forget this. Most of the guys you see bragging on internet forums about getting laid are not providing photos. If they did you’d be rather unimpressed. Many of the guys producing flashy moves in the street or in the bar do not actually bang the girls. Even the big names – they aren’t getting laid as much or as with as high quality as they’d like you to believe. Certainly the ones I’ve met aren’t.
Believing the hype encourages you to believe a central misdirection in Game that what you do in set is important.
Yes, competent execution of the model is important but it is nowhere near as important as being a high value man. My personal metaphor is of a sports car. Imagine you want to win Le Mans 24 Hour. So you take your car onto the racetrack several times a week and hone your driving skills. You spend your evenings on race simulators and make some trips to the Le Mans circuit to drive the real track and research the brake distances and racing lines. After a while you’ll be a great driver and know exactly how to drive the track in an optimal manner.
Then you show up one June weekend for the race. With your Ford Focus. And wonder what sticking point stopped you winning the race.
There’s alot of pussy hounds on the streets relentlessly approaching girls. Some of them, especially the ones who “get it” and don’t act like overexcitable hobbyists, develop finely-honed skills and expert calibration. They get laid. But they don’t get laid as much as they could because they are still lightweight one-dimensional men. So every lay is a grind, a limp payoff for hours and hours of drudgework. Usually with the bottom end of the quality pool that they approached.
If you want to up your success, take a break from approaching. Figure out how to be more of a man.