The fundamental basis of attraction

April 13, 2011
krauserpua

I’ve finally figured it out. What is the underlying principle from which all attraction springs? When you do something in a set and a girl responds well, what was your behaviour an expression of? What is the single most basic ingredient from which the entire superstructure of successful game rests?

It’s not value

It’s not character

It’s not survival and replication

The fundamental basis of all attraction is the ability to create order out of chaos.

That’s gonna need unpacking.

Nature has a plan. We have evolved into fixed gender roles so that mutually dependent men and women can specialise in skill sets and attributes that combine to create a strong family unit. At a high level of aggregation this is the exchange between a man’s means to provide (caring) and a woman’s gratitude for provision (caring). From this base an entire superstructure was built and we called it civilisation. Feminism and communism have since been wrecking it – the former by undermining the male role and the latter by undermining the family as the basic unit of society. This has created extreme disorder and disfunction.

Humans are designed with an innate desire for pleasure and will move towards it. However pleasure is hedonistic and does not bring satisfaction. Witness your typical witless drug-taker or sex addict. Satisfaction, the grounded feeling in your gut and the tranqility in your mind, comes from removing disorder in your life. This is beyond sexual attraction. Consider the following actions and the satisfaction they create:

  • Cleaning your room
  • Sorting your dvd collection into alphabetical order
  • Finalising your holiday itinerary
  • A well cut suit with shirt tucked and tie straight
  • Crossing the last item off your shopping list

The world is a disorderly place with multiple competing plants, animals and germs. It is the human capacity to impose it’s own order (i.e. own reality) and make the world bend to his will that gives us the platform to survive and replicate. When a woman attaches herself to a man with a strong reality it is increasing her chances for survival and replication. Dissatisfaction is signalled through disorder. Have you ever walked through a council estate and seen gardens with unkempt hedges and shopping trolleys and mattresses piled up? Have you noticed how people who flit from job to job, town to town, and lack stability are also usually disatisfied? Have you noticed how fat unkempt slobs are also full of neurosis?

Disorder is unattractive. The symptoms of disorder kill attraction.

So how does this relate to pick-up?

Nature evolved women to chase their tails until given direction from men. The natural state of affairs is that men lead and women follow. There is no evolution or development on the female side of our species – they simply reproduce mediocrity every generation because that is sufficient to be fertile. No risks are taken either in their biology or in their behaviour. Human advancement falls to men, whether we like it or not. It is up to men to create order.

Everything you project during your interactions with men and women must convey the ability to create order out of disorder. Examples:

  • Unreactivity to shit tests shows a solid reality grounded in order, not a fumbling fleeting weak-kneed character
  • Leading a girl shows you have a plan and will order her life
  • Strong open body language conveys power and relaxation, signs that a man is comfortable in having imposed himself on the situation
  • Intellectual mastery shows the mental tools to understand the world around you, identify the important areas, and organise them the way you want them to be
  • Escalation is taking the girl along the human courtship ritual, an ordered sequence of events
  • Having your shit together in life through your appearance, grooming, job and schedule are surface markers of an orderly existence she can slot into
  • Repelling AMOGs shows your reality is stronger than theirs and thus you are the king in this social order

We currently live in a world of weak men and disorderly women. Men have ruined their ability to create order and thus women screen for societally-bestowed surface markers of order-creation, such as wealth and social status. Women have ruined their submissive nature and allowed free regin to their hedonistic bullshit and thus men screen for the last-gasp surface marker of order – balanced physical appearance. Modern dating advice is based on operating within these disfunctions rather than smashing through them.

* hat-tip to the Principles of Social Competence for putting the last piece in place to boil this down to one element. It’s a great book.

60 Comments

  1. Goddamn Krauser, now this is a new angle on “Game” I never considered. Yet it makes perfect sense.

    Well done.

  2. GOLD.

    The last paragraph especially. I’ll do a post on this with a quote and a link-back.

    “Have you ever walked through a council estate and seen gardens with unkempt hedges and shopping trolleys and mattresses piled up?”

    Yes, Liverpool is the fly-tipping capital of the UK.

    “Have you noticed how people who flit from job to job, town to town, and lack stability are also usually disatisfied?”

    I feel like you’re calling me out personally there Krauser. I’m trying to put down some roots. Ha ha ha!

    “Have you noticed how fat unkempt slobs are also full of neurosis?”

    See it all the time.

  3. A reactionary theory of game?

    [explain the relevance or I’m treating it as spam. K.]

  4. “What is the underlying principle from which all attraction springs?”

    Order is the essence of a leader’s power (an “Alpha” if you prefer). While women are attracted to markers of status and strength, they succumb to order.

    “Game” teaches Alpha mimickery. Order, strength and influence are what a true leader has learned to master and exploit in ALL areas of life. Status, women, money, obedience and respect all come as a result thereof.

  5. Damn, man. This is some good stuff.

    Lots to ponder about this in regard to my own life…

  6. Truly fantastic.

    I feel like I have just taken the red pill.

  7. Really good and very smart. It pays to have a dominant reality.

  8. Good stuff. I’ve been waiting for the next level of game, the 200 level of classes, and I think you hit it on the head.

    I’d add, as a corollary, the level of alpha required to establish order increases as level of general disorder increases. So…
    1. in orderly Japan, you don’t need a lot of alpha; and
    2. black women require more “primal” alpha from black men than white women do from their men as black communities are more disorderly than white communities.

  9. Legit, as usual, Krauser.

    All systems experience disorder–chaos or entropy. This is bad, because it results in the whole universe being an undifferentiated mass of blandness.

    In biological systems, self-unfolding order is referred to as negentropy–spontaneous production of order, or the exportation of disorder. This is a powerful, powerful model for game, for it leads to massive state control. This is the essence of masculinity–being an immovable object in the face of all forces. This is the force of the planets moving unwarried in their orbits. Negentropy = game. This is the shit, amigo.

    From wikipedia: negentropy is the force that seeks to achieve effective organizational behavior and lead to a steady predictable state.

    I’ll have to pick up that book you recommended.

  10. So as the great Pimpin Ken one said hoes need guidance, because without it there useless.

  11. Not really mate. Your suggestion is too abstract to be plausible. No offense, but you’re not a theorist.

    I am theorist. And here’s my theory. The basis of attraction can be boiled down to 6 archetypes
    (3 male, 3 female).

    Dom – Disciple, (Dom, the man leads, Disciple, the woman follows)
    Sugar Dad- Mother Hen, (Sugar Dad, the man provides resources, Mother Hen, the woman commits time)
    Cad – Siren (Cad, the man is socially exciting, cocky-funny, Siren, the woman is sexy and hot)

    The Cad-Siren archetypes are the most significant ones for raw attraction, and you can boil those down to:

    Cad: Exciting
    Siren: Hot/Beautiful

    So in a nutshell, woman want excitement, men want beauty.

    • Marc, your break down is childish. The Principles of Social Competence blows away your crappy theory. No contest at all.

      Women want excitement? That’s stupidest theory I’ve ever heard. You can find fail theories like that in Cosmo. lol

      • The archetypes I name are backed by pretty solid science you know. Google, check your sources, the answers are out there. Check this thread:

        http://www.overcomingbias.com/2010/07/cads-dads-doms.html

        Cited:

        “The proper dichotomy is not “virile vs. wimpy” as has been supposed, but “exciting vs. drab,” ”

        I feel Krauser’s theory might fit into the first set of archetypes; Dom-Discipline (man, leading, creating order, woman following). So his theory could be solid so far as it goes, but I just don’t think its the whole story. I don’t see the other types of archetypes as dysfunctional, just different.

      • That’s not solid science. That’s called wishful thinking.

        So many kids throw around the term “science” like they just found a new toy. That’s NOT how science works. Sorry to burst your bubble.

  12. Very interesting post – but how would you relate these ideas to the concept that woman like some drama in their relationships with men. I find with some women if you don’t stir the pot a bit, create some uncertainty and generally do similar things they will get bored and lose interest. These would appear to be actions that create more chaos yet still have a strong appeal for women. How does this fit with your post about women wanting order?

    • “How does this fit with your post about women wanting order?”

      Drama is a test that men must pass.

      If a woman creates drama and you establish order you pass the test. If a woman creates drama and it leads to disorder you fail the test.

      [this man has nailed it. K]

    • The reason those women lost interest is because YOU bored them. Women don’t want drama. They want to be social just like everyone else does. To imply that you have to be stupid and create some imaginary drama is something a chick watching a soap opera would recommend. You are really just trying to make up for your own disorderly shortcoming in not being able to lead a woman toward order.

  13. i love the deep thinking and theorizing, but i feel like this theory is missing something. i feel it is too logical, and missing certain elements of fantasy, danger, thrills, excitement, etc.

    without specifically comparing it to my evolving theories on female attraction to men, let me just put down what i have learned so far:

    1. we know that women are sexually attracted to powerful men.

    but what does that mean, “powerful”?

    2. in my theory, a powerful man — and thus an alpha man — is a man who lives in his own world, by his own rules, and who does whatever the fuck he wants to do. that man could be a very socially “successful” man like a CEO or a rock star, or a social outcast like a renegade — or even the gardener, in a way. the rugged gardener could be alpha.

    so if a man lives in his own world, then what does that mean?

    3. it means that he has mastered his world, crafted and carved out his own reality — which fits with your chaos to order theory. sort of. more than that, though, i think there is a deeper emotional component: that that man is not afraid. that man is psychologically in charge of his environment, and has no deep anxiety or fear.

    and?

    4. women are full of anxiety and fear. they experience every damn emotion all the time, and soak up their environment and notice and observe and live their lives through an emotional lens. so if and when a girl comes across a man who does not live in fear, who has mastery, and who is rock solid hard — a man whose core being is hard and tough and strong and unbeatable — what we attempt to describe when we say a man is “confident” — when she meets this man, she is irresistibly drawn to him because he is the opposite of her.

    we can say that he can provide protection, or safety, or create order for her children, or whatever, but that’s not enough. that doesn’t go deep enough.

    why not?

    5. because that core toughness can be just a fling. she can be drawn to that masculine energy — the intoxicating feeling of being all powerful — for just one night, or one weekend, or whatever. to submit to a very powerful man — a real alpha man who is not afraid — is an intoxicating feeling of escape, of fantasy, of submitting to something much larger than yourself.

    does this explain why women are attracted to serial killers?

    6. yes it does. serial killers and vampires do nothing to create order — the opposite. they create drama, they instill fear and danger, but that is what is so attractive about them. their awesome masculine power to fuck with their environment.

    anything else?

    7. yeah. the essence of the feminine is soft and delicate. so the delicate seeks out the hard and invincible. a CEO can be hard and invincible. so can a vampire. or a serial killer. or a rock star. or a renegade biker. or a genius, misunderstood, brooding artist. all these masculine archetypes have one thing in common — mastery over a world they have created, and NO FEAR.

    creating order is just a small part of that.

    8. and, for a woman, delicate and soft, being in close contact with a real man who is hard and invincible — there is a strong potential for danger there, because he is in fact so powerful. that is why when a girl feels that a man is dangerous, she feels she is tapping into the core masculine energy, so she gets turned on.

    again, how does a dangerous man create order? in some ways yes, but in some ways he can create disorder. maybe a larger disorder for the world, but order for himself. again, think of the serial killer.

    so key takeaways:

    create your own world
    master your world
    no fear — cultivate a hard inner core — meaning, ignore your emotions
    cultivate a sense of power and even danger about yourself — this is also where the “be unpredictable” comes from

    YOU ARE A FORCE OF NATURE
    NO ONE CAN TAME YOU

    and that is the ultimate aphrodisiac for a girl
    encountering a force of nature
    which she of course will want to attempt to tame
    with her pussy

    i recently saw twilight for the first time, and was impressed by how edward cullen ticked off every one of the major alpha traits.

    [My last sentence is important. The drama and excitement mentioned in comments is about slotting into dysfunctional patterns to enable dysfunctional traits. Such as the bad-boy/hottie dynamic. I’m talking about an orderly man dealing with a functional woman (who may require training for her role). All my relationships for 15 years were lacking in petty drama and no weaker because of it because I brought order and held strong hand. I’m not talking about getting stupid sluts drunk and clacking them for a pump and dump. K.]

    • Rivelino brought some really good points for this post. The order out of chaos and the need to seem in control of the situation, all really good stuff.

    • “Too logical”? Huh? That’s like saying your car runs too well, so it’s not a good car. Makes no sense.

      “fantasy, danger, thrills, excitement”– these things do NOT cause attraction. They are novelty items like watching a car crash. It’s interesting but not attractive. Danger isn’t attractive. People aren’t drawn to danger. The only people who put their lives in jeopardy are dysfunctional guys with hundreds of tattoos. Fantasy is a reaction to have a very disorderly life. The guys who fantasize the most are the guys who can’t get laid in real life. Excitement isn’t a necessity. Being in love is exciting. But it’s not because you’re being chased by 200 bad guys. All your terms are short-sighted and represent a disorderly view of the world. They certainly don’t attract women. You’re confusing the orderly parts with the disorderly trappings. This is like looking at an orderly leaf under a microscope and mistaking its beauty for the serial killer responsible for putting it under the microscope. You’re confusing the pretense of order the substance of order.

      once again, you’ve failed to see that most guys are emasculated. That is not an orderly state for a man to be in. Vamps/serial killers represent order in the sense that they TAKE a woman. In other words, they have balls. This is orderly. To have a purpose and to go after it is the most orderly thing possible. Men today don’t have that, that’s why women don’t fantasize about regular guys. They represent everything that is wrong with men.

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  16. Well written, thought provoking and with some great moments. But totally wrong.

    [Helpful. K.]

  17. just mental masturbation
    be an Alfa , all other stuff – don’t care – stop writing so much philosophy.
    its not that complicated – don’t over-complicate.

    קרן

  18. Dont’ only respond to the crappy comments, you’re trying to amog them.

    Its a really good article, i’ll read the book.

    How do you fit humor in this though, seems that most humor is about upsetting a person’s expectations. And deviating from expectations = disorder no?

  19. Those who see this post as overcomplicated are projecting–it’s the simplest thing in the world. Creating order is the only way that nature builds complexity and beauty in ecosystems, and it’s those at the top of the chain that create the most order.

    If you think that female’s need for drama contradicts this idea, you don’t understand negentropy. Order (in the alpha’s mind and heart) can be created by exporting disorder (creating drama in the relationship.)

    Sometimes creativity is destructive. Sometimes small amounts of disorder are used to create order. Picasso had to destroy many containers of paint to create masterpieces.

    On the whole, it makes utmost sense in long-term relationships to create order, to lead, to move away from drama. Lack of drama doesn’t mean lack of passion.

    What I see here in the negative commenters is a lack of vision.

    [Bingo. K]

  20. ‘does this explain why women are attracted to serial killers?
    6. yes it does. serial killers and vampires do nothing to create order — the opposite. they create drama, they instill fear and danger, but that is what is so attractive about them. their awesome masculine power to fuck with their environment.’

    @Rivelino –

    I didn’t realize the secret of game was to become a serial killer..;)
    But do serial killers and vampires not create ‘order’ in their world? Do they not control the reality of their world? There are many ways man or beast can create order.

    I think you may be confusing what order has to be, one’s ‘order’, or ‘ control of reality’ will be implicitly different depending on who is most powerful and what the environment is. As you mentioned, power can come in different forms.

    As @OhioStater said, ‘If a woman creates drama and you establish order you pass the test. If a woman creates drama and it leads to disorder you fail the test.’

    Absolutely. Whether or not this is the best ‘order’ will only last until something more powerful challenges it. Order in itself doesn’t have to be predictable or boring, it becomes that way because it is tested and fails to adapt, hence the disorder.

    Negatively, drama can be the birth/evolution of disorder and the death of order.

    OR

    Positively, drama can be the further evolution of order and abortion of disorder.

    Adapt!

    • “serial killers” and “vampires” represent what you are NOT: a REAL MAN.

      If you knew anything about female sexuality, you’d know that most women today fantasize about rape or being controlled/dominated in some way. This is what these 2 types represent. They are dominant. The men today are not. Guys who are dominant are essentially the guys who lead relationships. This is orderly.

      Girls don’t like serial killers and vampires because they murder. They like them because they represent guys with spines who will not defer and cater to childish whims like 99% of the men out there today.

      Girls are taught to like passive guys by the feminist media. But in reality, the no one is looking, their instincts and design take over. Their natural position is a submissive one, even if they’re taught to be just the opposite. That’s why women claim they like passive nice guys, but they actually fantasize about dominant guys because that’s orderly. Guys who are passive are a product of culture not nature. Guys are naturally aggressive. But our feminist culture has taught them that being passive = masculine.

  21. Interesting post as always but I disagree. Order is too abstract of an idea to be the fundamental of attraction. Rather I think its strength of will.

    If you see a pretty girl and you are afraid and thus dont talk to her, the most direct reason why you do not is because you lack strength of will, not because you are in a state of disorder. Order is a quality that comes after strength of will. With strength of will comes everything else, e.g. confidence, strong body language, playfullness, cocky and funny, etc.

  22. What women seek is not ‘order’ but strength.

    Arranging my dvd’s alphabetically does not get me laid. We all know of the nice-guy accountant with immense order in his life (including alphabetically arranged dvds) but no pussy. And we know of guys whose lives/homes/finances are a mess, but they get laid all the time.

    Here’s why :
    If my dvd’s are alphabetically arranged but I am wussy about it, women will find alphabetically arranged dvd’s wussy. But if my dvds are randomly arranged and I reframe it as a good thing because it allows me to listen to music that I don’t usually hear, women will find randomness sexy.

    Women want to fuck the man with the stronger reality. Period.

    *Btw, if you’ve read about chaos theory and how there is a method to the madness in chaos, you will realize that there is ‘order’ in chaos too. And so those randomly arranged dvd’s are actually quite ‘ordered’ at a different level.

    [The DVD example is just about how you feel when you remove disorder from your life, how bringing order is satisfying. It’s not the “dvd comfort routine” to bang a girl. Disordered guys who get girls are doing it in spite of those elements of disorder, not because of them. There’s other order in their lives that overcomes it. K]

    • This is completely stupid. This is like saying that guys posing with their bicep flexed actually turn women on. Have you ever even talked to a woman before?

  23. Wrote a gr8 long comment and then closed the window accidentally. Doh.

    Executive summary: This is mental masturbation. Pickup is not particle physics. KISS.

    I learn more from 10 consecutive cold approaches and post video analysis than I do from hours of studying theoretical underpinnings to game. The only theory you need to understand is evo psych/sexuality as the basis of alpha mimicry/transformation. Everything else is fluff imho.

    [That’s like saying new boxers only need to spar rather than learn about principles of power and body mechanics. It’s true that sparring is vital and should eventually be where you spend 70% of your gym time, but it’s not enough. You’ll end up full of bad habits and inefficient output. K]

  24. This is all in the Mystery Method.

    • Not really. Mystery method is the exact opposite.

      [That’s my buddy Bhodi pretending to be my buddy Jambone to troll the thread by taking the piss out of one of JJ’s favourite phrases. An in-joke. K]

  25. No offence but this is akin to mr accountand (who does nothing if not create order out of chaos) who irons his underpants getting all the pussy. Which we know is false. And how does this explain the artist/poet guy who hasn’t got a pot to piss in but still gets the all the fanny.

    Think the drop out guy in the film Casino who who sharon stone cannot keep away from. He has his shit together.

    You good krauser but your not that good – this smells a bit of your projection to be honest.

    And another thing – you have some natural talent but you need to learn to objectify women more. Its obvious in a lot of your pick up scenrio and facebook commentary. Its really holding you back. Ps my headcount is well over 100.

    [Thank you anonymous internet guy, and I just love fictional examples – K.]

  26. Even in this comment thread Krauser has managed to keep producing order and hold his strength of reality. Perfect example of the theory in action. Most of the negative comments have been reactionary, poorly thought out, and clear indicators that the source material was never comprehended in the first place. Keep trying douche bags.

    Stop confusing point blank reality with the more overarching sub-reality spoken of

    Ex: To take a girls hand and spin her around is not disorder (despite the human inability to exist comfortably in a spinning environment). Its a calculated move designed by its engineer (the man) to lead a girl to sex by first bringing her into his reality (order).

    Can i call that order from chaos bla bla bla?…sure. But thats muddying up the point by taking two versions of the same thing into account. Focus on the implied version of order and less the point blank version.

    [This – K.]

  27. Your welcome. But this remains an example of typical older guy projection. You can do what you like this but – sincerely – your ego is holding you back.

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  29. this is a comment to CJ :
    how come you always reply on other people comments, and never post you own opinion ?
    I like reading the opinions, while you my deer CJ just bash them.

    • What are you talking about? My opinion is contained in all of my comments. How could I comment in the first place if I didn’t have an opinion? You sound like a chick trying to bash me just because you’re upset over how I made you feel.

      • see, now you are escaping from the answer. I have no problem with your comments – on the contrary I solute you for your humor and Cynicism. keep it up.

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  32. Ill second that to cj the faggy sicophant. Your like richard the hamster hammond to krausers clarkson.

  33. Actually i would say its all about value. All of these add value for guys:

    Confidence.
    Facial looks
    Body condition
    Wit
    Clothes/style
    Money

    Obviously older guys are going to have a differant variation of the above to the younger guys. Projection happens when you try to alter your own perception of principles to fit your reality.

    I find myself slipping into this myself. I was very good looking when i was younger but at 35 these looks are starting to fade. I can no longer rely on them alone, but of ckurse they do help. Convserely my own status amd wealth and confidence has risen as the physical declines.

    Its human a human coping mechanism to changes ones opions and vales as life circumstances change – all tge more for things that are inevitable and we cannot halt. Age is a very good example of this.

    This is further illustrated when i was younger and had jack. As far as i was concerned wealth and status had nothing at all to do with success with women – I proved this regularly when out and about competing with hedge fund managers/securities traders etc, even in gold digger rich environments like upmarket bars in the City.

    So my point is – ALL of the attributes stated above can – and do – bring value in varying degrees and to varying degrees. To state “creating order out of chaos” – essentially having your shit together – as the most powerful thing is foolish – just as foolish as saying warren buffets wealth entitles him to a hareem or a that mr four times a week gym head always gets the girl. Where there’s projection theres normally supplication.

  34. Hello Krauser

    I found this principle (“ability to created order created attraction”) described in more detail in a free eBook I read today:

    http://manhood101.com/ebook.html

    [did you not see the blindingly obvious link to precisely this book in my post? K.]

  35. OhioStater says:
    April 13, 2011 at 10:28 pm
    “…black women require more “primal” alpha from black men than white women do from their men as black communities are more disorderly than white communities.”

    Ohio, very true.
    reminded me of an episode of the Sopranos, where tony, leader in his world, tries to be friends with some wall street guys. he comes across as a fool.

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